Are you still TTC?

[StormCiara]

Just wondering where other people are at right now...

We've been ttc for a couple of months, had strong symptoms and late period this month. Would have been delighted with a second - DS is just two.

But I'm really questioning whether to give it a rest this month given the state of play with out healthcare system. What's everyone else doing, if anything, and what's your thinking?

Well I couldn't speak for everyone, there'll be women with fertility problems that just can't bring themselves to stop - and I'm not sure I would in that situation.
But if you've not been trying long / trying for a second and didn't have any trouble getting pregnant the first time, basically not under any fertility limitations, yes I'd stop for now.

Thanks. Yeah I'm sure if you're doing it under pressure - like if you have a condition which means you need to get on with it urgently - you'd not want to miss a cycle.

I am 14 weeks pregnant and a lot of the maternity care is having to be cancelled because of CV. I’m isolated at home for 12 weeks and feeling very stressed about it all.

If I were you, I would stop for a couple of months.

I've been ttc for 2.5 years and have experienced recurrent miscarriage, 3 in the last 12 months. Despite my age (36) and history, we're pausing ttc for now. We were in the middle of private investigations which are on hold for the foreseeable future. It's shit but the right decision for us now. We don't know enough about the virus, plus the pressure on the NHS at the moment, it feels right to pause. I will need additional tests and scans in future pregnancies, which the NHS isn't currently able to offer.

I've been the for 5 months and have paused. Hopefully will give it to September to see how things calm down and then reassess...everything seems too turbulent just now - especially when they say it's only going to get worse!

We've put it on hold. Tbh, it's made us question whether it's something we want to go ahead with at all.

We've put it on hold. It would be our second and I'm high risk. Going to reassess June time. If this continues as I think it may we have said we maybe won't. I'm 35 next year and this age was mentioned by my consultant last time as a contributing risk factor to what's happened previously in two pregnancies. It would be really sad but I'm not optimistic or mentally secure enough to consider it right now, although I'm so broody.

We were going to start trying for a second this month but aren't. I'm a bit sad about it - DS (20 months) took two years and three miscarriages so I'm worried that the longer we wait the more likely it is that a second will never happen - but I think it's very much the right decision.

I’m really sorry @VenusStarr

@LeaveTheBottle I know what you mean. Would this be your first? I was so so desperate for DS I put aside all the ‘what kind of world is this’ feelings and just went with the love. This time around, right now, it’s not so clear cut.

@LisaSimpsonsbff yeah we’re heading towards a much bigger age gap than I ever expected if we stop (had a relationship wobble which slowed us down last year).

@DieCryHate it’s such a tough decision.

It wasn’t plain sailing for me first go round either-had a medically complex mc at 12 weeks and was very ill-I think a healthy pregnancy would probably be ok right now by if anything went wrong...

My NDN is an NHS midwife. She said she’s praying that people stop trying to conceive at the moment which will be really hard for a lot of people, but currently she has 2 labour wards, 1 for non-corona symptoms, the other for corona symptoms, they don’t have the PPE, staff are going off sick or self isolating and they’ve had to cut back hugely into ante-natal care. Plus they have no idea how covid-19 might affect a foetus.

OP, no I actually have a 13 year old, but became insanely broody over the past couple of years. We were already wondering if we wanted to start all over again and also worried about where the world is going etc.

I think the latest has really pushed us back into the 'quit while you're ahead' camp, but we'll see where we are after the summer.

I'm pregnant but this doesn't feel like a good time to have a baby.

My midwife said they are expecting a baby boom from people being at home so much.

We’ve been trying for nearly 18 months for no 2 and honestly the thought of pausing is so hard - but we’re both frontline workers, we’re both carrying on exposing to the virus and although it’s unlikely we’d get pregnant naturally at this stage if I did I’d be effectively taking myself out of the workforce and putting more pressure on and I’m not sure I can do that.
I need to lose some weight anyway so I’m tempted to use the next 3-6 months to focus on that and then pick it up when all this is over

@StormCiara that's how we feel. If we had that mythical crystal ball and could be assured of a problem free pregnancy and birth we probably would. I'm sorry you've experienced similar, it really does affect your outlook doesn't it? We also have a little boy. He fills me with so much joy so I feel very blessed but also don't want these toddler years to end, he starts school next year.

I'm hoping early summer we've got far enough that TTC isn't a stupid idea.

@Pulpfiction1 ha, well going by this thread it looks like the other way around-I was going to say at least you might get a clear run at the labor ward come December! It’s not just Corona-this will put a lot of people into massive financial instability.

Nope...

I was pregnant before all this started so unfortunately for me labour wards will be normal capacity with less staff and home birth is not an option for me. Feeling very anxious about the whole thing and honesty I wouldn't ttc now given the choice.

I was undecided about whether to start TTC before all of this kicked off. I'm 35 and very aware that time isn't on my side. To be honest, I think the last week has cemented it for me that I don't want kids at all.

I clicked on this because I was going to ask in private childfree groups if anyone thinks this will make anyone consider what they’re forcing more consumers into, or not at all. I know a few impregnated women whose latest kids will be born into {gestures} this , with economic collapse, mass deaths, and catastrophic climate change in their future, all of which will be made worse by the hundreds of thousands more humans produced every single day. Will that knowledge ever override the ‘but it’s what you do/I want a baby’ feelings of the majority?

I really wouldn’t at the moment. I had my DS last April in the middle of a bit of a baby boom as he was born 9 months after England reached the World Cup semi finals.

The maternity services were visibly stretched to breaking point then, I was left on my own during practically all of my active labour, and I gave birth in one of the largest specialist maternity hospitals in the country.
And that situation is nothing compared to the pressure the NHS is currently under.