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Being mixed race an living in poole

38 replies

Dunker31 · 14/03/2020 19:55

Hi,
Looking for advice thinking of moving to Poole in the summer for a better way of life for my children to grow up in however I’m a bit concerned as I know the community is mainly white british I have a mixed race daughter who is due to start secondary school in September and I was just looking for any advice regarding how it would be for her if there is a lot of racism or if the area is a bit multicultural.
Any advice would be great

OP posts:
Regain4men · 14/03/2020 22:59

Its not multicultural.

Greenmarmalade · 14/03/2020 23:04

Racist. We lived in Bournemouth and I taught in Christchurch. Even some of the teachers were racist!

Bournemouth is multicultural but it’s a transient student population. It’s not welcoming, there’s no sense of community and no arts scene.

Greenmarmalade · 14/03/2020 23:05

We moved away because our children are mixed race, and because I didn’t want to live in such an unfriendly place.

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vhs95 · 15/03/2020 07:37

I can't comment on Poole specifically but the surrounding Dorset area is predominately white British and when we go to stay on the Isle of Purbeck you could be living back in the 1950s. Are you able to spend some time in Poole before you have to commit? Good luck.

StewPots · 15/03/2020 07:59

I live in Devon in a smallish town and I have to say that here, although predominantly white, there is a mixture of races - there's a few Asian and mixed race children who attend my DC CofE school for example.

It doesn't feel inherently racist here - we do have a very small multicultural community and they are well supported if anyone is racist towards them. A lady who has mixed race children with her locally born white husband has a restaurant, and some fucking moron had tagged it with a bit of racist graffiti.
This lady and her family are very well liked in our town, and the outrage from the community - all ages and races - on local social media pages was very clear, that this is not to be tolerated here.
I was proud of our little community for calling it out although sadly no CCTV to catch the idiot.

I think it depends on the attitude and the demographic. Possibly if you're worried I would look at coming towards one of the larger towns or a city like Exeter, instead of a more insular place. But as I don't live in Dorset I can't comment on what it's really like there, just give you my outlook on where I am in South Devon.

LolaDarkdestroyer · 15/03/2020 09:56

You wouldn't be giving them a better way of life though as it is lively in summer but deprived in the other months. People have these "dreams" that living by the sea is a better way of life but in reality it isn't.
Places like that unless you're born and bred there can be very unfriendly. Why don't you go semi/rural somewhere?

Dunker31 · 15/03/2020 10:52

Thanks for all your replies I used to love in Palestine poole when my eldest child was a baby and had to move back to London due to commitments and I found it a lovely place to live but obv things have slightly changed now I have a mixed race child which is causing me a bit of concern as I want somewhere a bit quieter than London with lower crime with still a bit multicultural where they can go out and feel safe

OP posts:
neddle · 15/03/2020 11:04

Wow!
Some strong opinions here - how many of you have actually visited Poole?
I’ve lived in Poole for 20 years and it’s not unfriendly, racist or deprived.

Katjolo · 15/03/2020 19:46

Not multicultural or diverse. Nice beaches though!

MuddledUpAgain · 15/03/2020 19:52

I live in Poole (and grew up here as well) and I'm a teacher. I teach children of all skin colours and nothing is said at all about it by them.

It's not the most diverse place but is more diverse now than when I was growing up. I have heard any racist comments whilst out and about.

Lynda07 · 15/03/2020 19:53

Could you not move to the outskirts of London? I live somewhere that is lovely with a low crime rate and a good mixture of races and culture.

MrsJoshNavidi · 15/03/2020 20:02

Just out of interest - why Poole?

firesong · 15/03/2020 20:04

I found Poole less racist than Middlesex / Greater London area. There are fewer people of mixed race, yes.

Dunker31 · 15/03/2020 20:48

Lynda07 I am open minded to areas am just looking for somewhere less busy less trouble and more calmer environment

OP posts:
Dunker31 · 15/03/2020 20:49

Mrsjoshnavidi I used to live in Poole many years ago and my youngest child was born there I have been going to Dorset for holidays since I was born

OP posts:
FiveGoMadInDorset · 15/03/2020 20:52

I live on the Iale of Purbeck and we have sedintmey made it to the 80's now, joking apart that is such a misrepresentation of the area

FiveGoMadInDorset · 15/03/2020 20:52

Definitely even

AdoptedBumpkin · 15/03/2020 20:54

Surprised by this. I've heard some good things about Dorset.

Brainengaged1 · 16/03/2020 01:47

It’s sad to hear that racism is affecting the choices of where you choose to live . Whilst it’s never acceptable you cannot protect your children from the world out there who are so ignorant .its natural to want to avoid exposure and I’m not advocating will fully putting your child in an unhappy place . However what happens when they go to uni or work in a predom white area? Teaching them to be proud of their heritage and to embrace their difference is a powerful tool and builds resilience . Educate your child on their ethnicity and not to be ashamed and feel they need to avoid areas of the country . They will become comfortable in their own skin , but this will be as a result of building up character because of life situations
Trust me you can get racism in any area even diverse ones - so please don’t feel you have to avoid . If this was the case people from diverse backgrounds would always feel that certain jobs were not from them, or they could never aspire to live on x street because no one looks like them them .
I’m not saying go and live in an area dominated by national front types , but don’t pigeon hole areas of the country just because they are not diverse enough .

JingsMahBucket · 16/03/2020 03:38

@Brainengaged1
If this was the case people from diverse backgrounds would always feel that certain jobs were not from them, or they could never aspire to live on x street because no one looks like them them .

Errm, they do feel that way already. Have you ever talked to any? Confused You sound incredibly naive and in denial/deliberately obtuse about racism and how it affects children growing up. It’s much easier to inoculate your children against its ill effects if they see more people like them versus being the one of something. The OP has the right idea being concerned about multicultural areas and how their children will fit in.

SomeoneElseEntirelyNow · 16/03/2020 04:17

@Brainengaged1 you're white, right?

Brainengaged1 · 16/03/2020 05:57

Yes I’ve talked to ‘any’ . I am that group you refer to as ‘any’ . I find that’s quite an offensive expression to use .

I understand OP concern and rightly so , but I have lived through this and would encourage her to see another set of issues she may be storing up for the future

moresugarpls · 16/03/2020 08:16

Yes I’ve talked to ‘any’ . I am that group you refer to as ‘any’ . I find that’s quite an offensive expression to use .

Hmm

You're reaching here

moresugarpls · 16/03/2020 08:17

And I say that as a fellow 'any'

Letsallscreamatthesistene · 16/03/2020 08:33

Ive spent quite a bit of time in Poole (although have never lived there as such). Its nice but not a particularly great town to grow up in as im not sure theres a lot going on unless you like sailing. I wouldnt move there tbh.

Id look move to Bournemouth though, loads of things to do, bigger place, bigger mindset, still has a beach. Also close to Poole if you want to visit.