A random adult called my DD’s phone

[twosoups1972]

A unknown number rang on my 13 year old DD’s phone. She wasn’t in the room so I answered it.

It was an adult woman who said her name was ‘Karen’ who was talking about meeting up with dd and she knew DD’s name. I didn’t know what to say so I said I was DD’s mum and she apologised and said it was a wrong number.

I’m a bit freaked out that an adult has my DD’s number and knows her name. Advice please?

I’m worried now they got her number from Tik Tok. She has a private account and only follows people she knows. What are the risks?

HCP or pastoral worker at school?

I’m worried now they got her number from Tik Tok. She has a private account and only follows people she knows. What are the risks?

The risks of TikTok? She should not be on it. The mere fact that you are asking indicates you don't really know what she is being exposed to.

The phone number i would say is unlikely I have come from TikTok, unless she gave the number to someone; but please please research the app before you allow her to use it again. It's sickening the things kids are seeing on there.

Sorry meant to add, only following people you know on TikTok doesn't stop you seeing everything else.

@bemoreeverything I held off on SM for as long as I could. But it's VERY difficult when all her friends are on it. And no I am not an expert, it is a huge learning curve for us as parents having not grown up with it.

What do you mean by 'seeing everything else'? An explanation in layman's terms would be helpful.

What do you mean by 'seeing everything else'? An explanation in layman's terms would be helpful.

Have you never even looked at the app?

Your child is exposed to EVERYTHING.

In layman's terms, go take a look. Who she follows is just that, who she follows. It doesn't restrict what she sees.

But I don't see how someone could have got her name and number from Tik-Tok...?

And no I am not an expert, it is a huge learning curve for us as parents having not grown up with it.

I didn't grow up with it either nor do I profess to be an expert. You can however take the very simple step of checking apps before allowing them. That way you get some idea of what they do.

This morning, a 5 minute scroll gave me 2 pshyc ward teenagers with scars etc glamorising mental illness. 2 dead cats. An elderly man in a short dress and knee high boots dancing like a stripper. A dangerous 'challenge' where people knock an unsuspecting person flat on their back. 4 transgender young people talking about 'binding'. An anorexic teen hooked up to a drip in hospital joking about not eating.

Need I go on?

But I don't see how someone could have got her name and number from Tik-Tok...?

I don't think they did. I already said that.

The fact that you don't know what TikTok is exposing her tonis a separate issue.

Thank you @bemoreeverything that is indeed very worrying. I will have a look at the app on dd's phone later. How do you find these videos? I'm not techy and not familiar with many apps.

Literally when you open TikTok it opens on the 'for you' page which is just videoed ousted by randomers. Sometimes you could be there an hour and just see people dancing about, silly stuff, but other times it can bring some very dark stuff.

Talk. To. Your. Daughter.

I.already.have

UPDATE -

Mystery has been solved thank goodness. I posted a message on our class parents WhatsApp group and apparently it was one of the mums who had called dd by mistake. She has a friend with the same name. So I'm pleased that it's nothing sinister but a bit worried that a mum has my dd's number.

I just had a look at TikTok again and saw twerking, a disturbing scene of artificial insemination at a pig farm, a stupid skit Ida guy purposefully physically annoying his girlfriend, someone playing loud music and 'all these girls sucking my balls' outside a school with kids everywhere, three English teenagers bullying another in an alleyway..

Why on earth is the minimum age 13 for this app??

Didn't you ask her why she has the number?

I've sent her a private message. It's a bit odd that an adult would have a child's number in their phone. A child they barely know...?

I have my daughter’s friends’ numbers because she often uses my phone to call them.

It’s difficult- we drum into our children not to give our their number to people they don’t know, and in the meantime their number could be stored by anyone! I wouldn’t have the numbers of my dds’ friends - they’d think it was weird.

Does your daughter have a fairly common name, as the woman was arranging to meet someone with her name.

I can’t understand why she wouldn’t have explained that on the phone when she called initially and you answered

Our family share an iTunes account and any number saved on one device shows up on L devices linked to the account, could be that.

I don’t think it’s sinister that another parent you already know of has your DD’s number. I do think you should have checked out tiktok before letting her use it.

You’re focusing on the wrong things here.