Name change. Pom bears, wolef, Brian yoni, etc.
DH's brother is staying with us for a few days, while there's some structural work going on at his flat.
I just need to come here and vent.
He's harmless, but odd to the point where I wonder how I'm going to get through this!
He arrived afternoon, rang the doorbell and shouted through the letterbox to not worry as he was going to cook dinner as a thank you. I opened the door and he turned around and and said he was dashing off to Asda.
Three hours later he came back and made baked bean toasties with a "side order" of pickled beetroot. DH, I and DS (14) and DD (12), sat down and genuinely enjoyed the eccentricity of it.
BiL then presented (with a flourish) a flan base. We all just sat there bemused as he ran back into the kitchen. He then ran back in and tipped a tin of pears onto it, saying "Shit! That was supposed to be apricots". BTW, DH never swear in front of the DC, but we just sat with fixed smiles.
We ate it, but BiL just sat and angrily berated himself for buying the wrong tin.
Later on, he said he had a film for the "grown-ups" to watch. Apparently nothing offensive, but the children "wouldn't get it".
We were all sitting in the living room chatting, when he jumped up and said that he could hear the ice cream van. He couldn't. We live on the edge of a very rural and very tiny village. We've never had an ice cream van here.
BiL pressed £10 into DS's hand and told him to run outside and treat him and his sister to whatever they wanted. He said that they should catch the bus and go swimming afterwards. There is no bus.
In the end, DC went upstairs anyway, so BiL took the opportunity to put on is DVD, which was King Ralph, starring John Goodman.
Not my cup of tea, but DH and I sat and watched it. All the time BiL was excited (shuffling in his chair and saying "nearly there now") about a scene that we absolutely had to see, as it was so hilarious.
It wasn't remotely funny. An African king was visiting the court of King Ralph, leading to outdated and cringey 'humour'.
BiL rewound the scene for us twice, as he didn't think we "got it". He was doubled up with laughter the whole time.
After that he got a wodge of paper out of his bag, called the DC downstairs and asked if we know any origami. We all said that we didn't, but would like to see what he can do. He said he didn't know any and was a bit disappointed about that!
DD woke up in the night a bit frightened because there was 'screeching' coming from his room. It was a recording of monkeys that he likes listening to because it reminds him of "happy days" in which he volunteered at a woolly monkey sanctuary. Unfortunately he's now made a recording for DD, as he thought she would like it.
There are so, so many little oddities, but too many to go in to.
He's a lovely, kind and intelligent man. He works very hard for a refugee charity and is very passionate about looking after everyone who is vulnerable. But this is going to be a tough week!