Have you ever disclosed MH issues at work?

[EoinMcLovesCakeJumper]

I've been having regular GP appointments over the last couple of months because of anxiety, depression, and eating disorders. It's mainly been checking up on my progress and adjusting my medication, and I have to see a GP to get a new prescription.

I've fitted all this around my work by using flexitime, and by working from home on appointment days. I don't believe there has been any impact on my work but I have had to tell my boss when I've been going to a checkup. As yet, though, I haven't told him why I go.

Now I have a quarterly review coming up and my boss has indicated that he wants to discuss any "extra support" I might feel I need. If he directly asks about why I'm seeing the doctor so often, I really don't know what I ought to say. I don't want the whole mental health thing to be part of my working life, I don't want to have that hovering over me. I don't know my current boss very well, but he's younger than me and quite informal, and I don't even know if I can trust him not to be weird about it. I hope he wouldn't, but some people have been in the past.

What would you do? Have you told your employer about your mental health issues and did you feel like you'd done the right thing afterwards? Am I overthinking it?

I told my employer at interview. He hired me anyway and the company have been more than supportive. He said he liked that I was upfront and didn't pretend to be the perfect employee. Our deputy manager has personal experience with mental health problems in his family and has looked out for me since day one, to the point of being fiercely protective during a particularly rough patch. I dont regret being honest. They would have found out anyway one way or the other. At least you give them the chance to be supportive.

I’ve not been in your position OP but I’ve been in your boss’ position a couple of times.

Trust is important - you clearly need to be able to trust your boss here. In my experience its better to have someone you trust in the office that knows what’s going on in your personal life. That is someone you can then turn to when things are getting tough, and they can keep an eye out and might spot where things are getting challenging for you before you do. My staff that have shared their challenges with me have all said they wished they had done it sooner.

My work is really active around mental health topics and there is a huge amount of support for our people. We take it really seriously and encourage people to share where they feel comfortable doing so. We have lots of senior people sharing their experiences publicly also. Not every place is as open as this I know so I my experience may not be indicative of everywhere though.

How good is the general company culture, in terms of openness and offering flexibility generally? How long have you worked there?

I would love to say a definitive "go for it" but I've had some employees describe to me really poor experiences with their former employers. A good employer will see it as a positive that you feel comfortable trusting them with the information, and will work with you to identify any adjustments that might be helpful. I understand why people are fearful about disclosing though. There's a lot of work still to do to improve some employer attitudes.

Yes, but I have an amazing, supportive manager. At least part of my MH problems (stress/ anxiety/ something similar) are work-related, and they have become an issue since I started the job. It has taken her over a year to get me to even begin to open up about it, but it has been ok. Telling her stuff has been terrifying, and I have been really lucky with her reaction and how supportive she has been.

They talk the talk about it, for sure. The company supports a mental health charity and they offer mental health first aid training. But for all that, I can't say I've heard anyone discussing their own issues as opposed to MH in general, as an abstract concept. Statistically, I'm sure I have colleagues with depression and anxiety, and I'm sure some of them will have disclosed it, but I just don't know.

I've been there a couple of years and pretty much struggled along before I got treatment. I think people probably think I'm a bit spiky, tbh.

There is a lot of flexibility, to be fair - my boss genuinely doesn't care when I do my contracted hours I work as long as I fit them in somehow. I don't know if I trust him though, that's the problem. If he asks me directly I feel like I might feel under pressure to make something up, and then I'll have to remember what I said and maintain the fiction.

I own a business and one of our employees has had mental health issues through his whole employment (20 years) but has only fairly recently started actively seeking help with them.

He shared this with us and we have done whatever we can to help, offering part time work, his own work space (previously in a shared area), written instead of verbal instructions etc.

Partly this is to avoid him getting a Drs not and signing himself off sick for weeks at a time, which had happened before, but mainly it’s because it’s the right thing to do and we want him to be happy and productive at work.

I did, in a mental health NHS trust, and was told “off the record” it’d jeopardise my chances of promotion and be “frowned upon” as it “showed I couldn’t cope under pressure”

Yes, and unfortunately it led to bullying and me being forced out of my job.

Unfortunately lots of work cultures are not as supportive of MH issues as they like to appear.

I think that, since I don't need or want any special adjustments, there is no benefit to me to tell anyone about it. I'm sorry you had that experience howmanysleepsnow and adaline, it's exactly what I'm afraid of.

Thanks @EoinMcLovesCakeJumper

Luckily it turned out for the best and I'm now happily self-employed but I won't lie, it was a really tricky six months or so. My boss was one of those "we're really keen to support you, I know exactly how hard it is" when in reality he really wasn't.

He found dealing with someone who had MH issues too challenging, I think, and found a way to get me out because it was easier without me there. Unfortunately for him, karma bit him on the bum as it's been two months and they're still advertising my job

I work for a company that sounds like yours. They support mental health charities and promote positive mental health. But I'm afraid to tell them about my MH issues as I think it could be held against me in the future, for instance I think it could be held against me when going for a promotion. I do have a couple of people who I work closely with that know, but haven't told anyone who is more senior than me.

I think you have to really know and trust your boss, and I just don't. If he asks, I'll just say I have iron deficiency and have to go in for blood tests regularly to check my levels. This also happens to be true, so it's not like I would be lying, I would just not be telling him everything.

Yes I did,

And I colleague asked me if i was likely to come to work and shoot everyone like they do in America.

I was extremely distressed on many levels by this but i didnt do anything about it as i was intimidated by this popular member of staff.

Holymolymackerel Unobtainium I'm sorry, it's so shit that people are like that. I don't want to become some kind of poster girl for how great and supportive my organisation is, or be treated with caution in case I break. It's discouraging how poorly understood these very common issues still are. I haven't even told my family because they're still old-fashioned in their outlook and they'd think I'd "gone crackers".