Come and talk to me please. DP away with work and I'm really struggling with anxiety

[HowYouLikeThemApples]

Hi,

So I'm genuinely really embarrassed to admit this, because it makes me sound needy and pathetic, but anyway...

My DP is away with work for a couple of weeks and I miss them like crazy.

Can't sleep, can't stop jumping at every noise I hear and I'm counting down the days until they're home.

I know this isn't a healthy way to feel and I'm quite good at hiding it. Hence I'm on here, rather than admitting to friends how I'm feeling

Don't get me wrong, a night alone can be quite nice- watching what you want, getting a takeaway, PJs on, make up off...very unattractive face mask on but I still wouldn't sleep. Obviously I can handle it for a night or two, but two weeks is just horrible!

I am trying to keep myself busy, organising things to do, people to see, but it's still at night time that my mind starts wandering and I'm already starting to feel very low and on edge.

I've always struggled with anxiety, so this is just another trigger.

Anyway, please distract me, suggest things to do/to watch (which aren't dark or disturbing) or just chat

Thank you.

Oh god, only 30 minutes last night

I feel bloody awful. I did everything right- distracting TV series, breathing exercises, which normally help calm me down, not going to bed until I felt really sleepy and I even took some over the counter sleeping pills, but as soon as the light went off, my anxiety went on.

Every time I felt myself drifting, I'd get this bang in my chest, like a big heavy ball of anxiety aggressively saying, no, not gonna happen.

Pft. Should I not even bother going to bed tonight?

Anyone have any more tips or advice?

I've had this myself in the past. Kids staying over at friends, empty house, feeling anxious and unable to sleep.

I got round it by not going to bed! I just made a bed up on the sofa with duvets and pillow, put Netflix on and found I would invariably doze off. Somehow it's not the same as tossing and turning in bed 'trying' to sleep and getting more and more edgy and anxious. Once I'd determined to stay where I was I just felt more relaxed, could channel hop, pop to the kitchen to make a hot drink and just felt more secure downstairs somehow. If you've got a decent sized sofa it can be pretty comfortable too,

I'm often at my own at night now and it no longer bothers me, but on the rare occasion I'm feeling a bit anxious at night approaches, I kip down on the sofa with the telly on.

My DH is currently part way through 7 months away with work, we have a DS who is 8 months. At first I was terrified at night, but I am used to it now, I do have to check the doors a few times before going up to bed, but I used to have to stay up all night with the lights on and watch rubbish on telly because I was too scared to sleep. The key is to find something that works for you. I found having white noise on (Spotify have playlists which last for ages) and the landing light really helped. I'm not really sure what changed, but I think I'm just so used to it now. Do you have family close? I gave them a spare key just in case, and make sure my mobile is always charged and that I always have it on me.

@JunkshopLil I used to do this pre-kids when DH was away!!

@JunkshopLil, I actually really like the sound of that, but my dogs sleep in the kitchen, which has a glass door to the living room and if they know I'm in there they won't stop clawing and possibly barking to come in.

@Robuns, I've never actually tried white noise. I've tried meditation type music and sounds, like ocean waves, gentle rain etc and whereas it does make me feel more relaxed, I still can't drift off.

Might give the white noise a go- thanks.