Daughter anxiety attendance ! Help!

[Poodlemum1]

Can anyone help with advice for attendance fines ?
My daughter has severe anxiety the counsellor at school had first appointment today and has written report to attendance officer to say it’s not that my daughter WONT ago to school she CANT as her anxiety is so high.
We have been referred to CHAMS .

Things got so bad today I took daughter to school hyperventilating and managed to calm her slightly to she could see her counsellor. I left cried in the car went to work then my daughter and counsellor called me after her meeting (daughter breaking her heart on the phone )
When she was waiting so see the counsellor the head of year and an attendance officer from the council who was at school for another child has spoken to my daughter and the AO said we will have a meeting soon and it won’t be a pleasant one. My daughter immediately had another panic/anxiety attack and went to see the counsellor.

The counsellor is annoyed and appalled that this had been said and is writhing her report for AO . I have put a complaint in as well.

I don’t know how I stand about keeping daughter off as I can’t send her in this state but am worried about fines as we cannot afford any !

Any advice greatly appreciated

Is there a root cause of the anxiety that you know about?

Surely if the school's own counsellor says she's not capable of going, the AO can't fine you?

I honestly do not know about fines .

The initial root cause is the bullying , now her confidence is so low she doesn’t do her hair and be into her looks like she used to . She does not go out as she has no friends.
She has told me I am her best friend.

She is still doing well in school but her attendance is 63% I feel like the school are not interested in her feelings.

This counsellor is brilliant but we’re still in early stages ,I just feel helpless as I can’t help my daughter get back to how she wants to be and I don’t know what power the council or school has.

You'd need some kind of medical evidence to back up the anxiety for the absences to be authorised.

I have a letter from the doctors supporting migraines and anxiety and we are waiting for CHAMS referral for Diagnosis

for you and dd.
I’m sorry you are both having such a terrible time.
How old is dd?

She’s 13 , it’s effecting the whole family now we just feel helpless

I'm a school Governor and my link role is Attendance.

Bear in mind that these days most schools are academies so their policies and approach on Attendance can vary.

I'm very surprised that with Attendance of 63% already the AO is only just in touch with you, I agree it's very unprofessional to approach your daughter at school. Are you certain there's been no contact, letters, request for school attendance meetings so you can explain the situation before now?

We send a PN after 10 days missed BUT that's with no communication or the family have refused to meet or engage with the school. Medical evidence would help you with this. Have you seen a GP? You have the backing of the counsellor. I'm very surprised it's got to this point.

In our school we have a few pupils suffering so much anxiety three are in hospital education or on Part time timetables - we would never fine or harass in these circumstances. Even children waiting for CAHMS would not get letters as the school know how long the wait is.

I suggest engage as well you can with AO. Be open and honest and let them see your pro-active. I'm sure they won't fine in your circumstances.

What year is she in? I understand about anxiety as my dd suffered in Y9 and our attendance dropped. However things drastically improved in Y10.
If your dad's anxiety is so connected to school, bullying and she has no friends could she consider a school move?

We are now looking at a school move .

And no we have had no letters from AO and no introduction .

The counsellor is backing us and I’m t the doctors again today regarding CHAMS .
M
I feel like I’m trapped between the school and my daughter and my husband and I don’t know what to do . But one thing for sure I cannot send her in this state .

My daughter is in yr 8 so I really want this sorted or a school move before her options for GCSE next year as she is a very bright clever girl

If your looking at a school nice I wouldn't stress too much.

Just keep the lines of communication open with the school. Keep them informed about what is going on. Keep any letters, medication or any communications you've had about anxiety.

I'm utterly amazed the school have not been in contact with you before this. Normally letters indicating concerning attendance, then stronger letters as you go on. After letter 3 in our school the AO will personally be in contact to ask for a family meeting. This is to see what the issues are and to draw up a plan for the future.

Do you phone every morning to explain why she's off? Or is it classed as 'unauthorised'.

You're at the right stage to move schools. Hopefully she'll be well settled elsewhere for GCSE's. You could always say you're home-schooling until a place at a new school comes up?

Nice = move.

Thank you so much for the advice