Competitive showing off

[Peaswithit]

Just a rant really. You know those people who have always gone a step further, done something more exciting, been somewhere more exciting than you? Well I have a friend who takes it to a whole new level.

Every time I mention anything about myself she interrupts to talk about her own career / house / car - as if the mere mention of my own life is terrible to her. She’s much wealthier than me, has a bigger house, more prestigious career etc - so why does she do it? I don’t care! We’re never even talking about the same things! I might say, ‘something funny happened at work today’ and then she’ll say, ‘I was headhunted for my last job ...’

Its so infuriating and insulting! Makes me feel like she’s just condescending to spend time with me but everything I do or say is beneath her.

Every conversation consists of me listening eagerly to how great everything is and making the right noises back to her, and then afterwards I just feel used.

/ rant over

Am I the only one this happens to? Is it my problem or hers?

People like this are everywhere.

Remember, you get to choose your friends.

Preferably people who you feel relaxed and happy with, who make you laugh.

Not sure if she qualifies?

You’re right - she’s not so much a friend as the parent of one of my child‘a friends. Probably see her more than any of my real friends though! Sheen often turns up early to pick up her daughter, so we can have a ‘catch up’ .

She also plays on her phone when I’m talking

Buy this and leave it where she'll see it when she comes round for a 'catch up'.

You're Not Listening: What You're Missing and Why It Matters https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1787300951/ref=cmswwrcpptai_0rUvEb10ZHJ1D

Then offer to lend it to her as you have found that conversations really become more interesting since you learnt to listen well.

Ha ha! Love it!

She also plays on her phone when I’m talking

Well that's just fucking rude. Next time just walk off, mid sentence and without warning.

She sounds insecure, like she has something to prove.

Christ! She sounds awful, you need to drop in something outrageous like NASA wants you for the next mission, you’re auditioning for Love is Blind, you’re psychically connected to your cat, just something completely ‘out there’, and if she goes ‘huh’, just be like ‘just checking if you’re listening’, or totally style it out and she might back off on the basis that you’re a bit crackers.

She really does sound absolutely awful!

The phone thing is just so bloody rude and she clearly just wants someone to talk at, she has no interest in your life.

Next time she starts with the phone I would just get up and say you are going to fetch her child as she obviously has things she has to deal with so she had better get home to do them and let you get on with your day.

Every conversation consists of me listening eagerly to how great everything is and making the right noises back to her

Why do you do this?

She’s really rude all around. She's made it clear where you stand. She needs an audience (to boost herself up).

Being a friend and having actual conversations is a give-and-take and she does all the taking. I would try to avoid her going forward.

My BIL and SIL are a lot like her. Everything they have is the newest and the best, they’re so great, their kids are the best, ad nauseum. It’s hard having a conversation with them because anything we say is automatically grounds for one-upsmanship. They’ve even got their kids behaving the same way.

I’ve just stopped trying, but then of course I’m the rude one because I appear distant and uninterested. Thank God we only have to see them a couple of times a year.