Sean Connery was interviewed by Michael Parkinson, and
bragged that, despite being 72 years of age, he could still have sex 3
times a night.
Cilla Black, who was also a guest, looked intrigued. After
the show, Cilla said, "Sean, if I'm not bein' too forward, I'd luv to
'ave sex with yer. Let's go back to my 'ouse, we could 'ave a lorra lorra fun."
So they went back to her place. After a couple of drinks
they went off to bed and had an hour of mad passionate sex together.
Afterwards, Sean says, "If you think that was good, let me
shleep for half an hour, and we can have better shex. But while I'm
shleeping, hold my bawls in your left hand and ma wullie
in your right hand".
Cilla looks a bit perplexed, but says, "Okay".
He sleeps for half an hour, awakens, and they have even
better sex than before.
Then Sean says, "Shilla, that was wonderful. But if you let
me shleep for an hour, we can have the besht shex yet. You'll have to......."
"I know, Sean. Yer want me to 'old onto yer bat 'n balls again. No problem, hun".
Cilla complies with the routine. The results are absolutely mindblowing.
Once it's all over, they have a drink, Sean lights a cigarette and Cilla asks:
"Sean, tell me, dis 'oldin yer balls in one hand and yer willie in de other - does it really stimulate yer dat much?"
Sean replies:
"No, not at all, Shilla. But the lasht time I shlept with a scouser, the b!tch stole ma wallet."