How to be 50. If you’ve done it, come in here

[Shoveoff]

I’m 49. My marriage is unravelling, I’m in the worst physical shape I’ve been in for years and it seems like I now have to deal with the menopause.

What’s good about being in your fifties? How do you get some oomph? Or is it like the ick? Once you’ve lost the oomph can you ever get it back?

Help please. Feeling a bit sad.

Don't be sad...this could be your rock bottom...my friend started a new business aged 50 she was also out of shape...it's 3 years down the line now and she's won awards and is helping other people in their businesses too as a mentor.

Think about your ambitions...what do you want to achieve?

50 isn't like it used to be you know....people are working up to their late 70s these days OP....join a Yoga class...or start walking....and consider how you can make your ambitions come to fruition.

50 is just a number.
I started my own business when I was 44 but it didn’t take off properly until I was 49.
I started a new relationship at 56
Started travelling to exotic countries
I’m out of shape too, but it comes naturally with age, so I joined a gym and made new friends,
You could embrace the grey (I’m not ready to)
Just enjoy your health whilst you still have it, eat healthily, drink water, look after yourself, and I bet you’ll look great 💐

I started couch-to-5k when i was 49. It seemed a good time to start. Didn't finish first time but I restarted a few times and got there.
OP, It doesn't really matter what you do but just think of 1 part of your life to change and go for it. Other things might or might not follow, but just start something for you.

I'm 53, I behave like 14 year old most of the time. Works for me, but not for everyone.

I’ve gone past 50 and yes I am unfit and overweight with some health issues. However my DC are adult so I have the flexibility to suit myself which I do, I have a DH and he is very much the same although he is healthier than me.
We travel together and independently, pop out to the pub/dinner whenever we feel like it and pick the family events we want to attend.
In my working life I started a brand new role at 47 in a tech based industry so this keeps my brain fresh and provides ample opportunity to learn more. No menopause brain fog for me.

I am planning more fun stuff for 2020 including a holiday with the DC

I'm 49, my relationship of 27 years went tits up, but I feel like I'm ina great place. I've got through it. I feel very different though, like a real individual. I joined a gym just over a year ago and this has made a massive difference to how I feel about myself. I've made a lot of friends there too.

I joined a gym in my late 40s and went several nights a week. I met a man through a woman I made friends with there and got married at 52. I'm mid 60s now and still fit and active although I no longer go to the gym.

We statistically are at the bottom of a happiness curve, it's supposed to get better after this! I'm early 50s fine work and fitness wise, but struggling with health niggles and teenager / caring responsibilities, though they are temporary.

https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/the-happiness-curve-could-your-age-and-your-happiness-be-relatedukk_5ba90172e4b0375f8f9f2f63

Hello from a fellow 49er... feeling pretty much the same as you OP so following this post. Ooooomph where did you go?

I started to lose weight and get fit when I was 51, it can be done. You just have to get on with it and not make excuses for yourself.
I went through menopause when I was 54, yes it was a bit crap for a while, but not having periods is fantastic.

I’m 45, but in peri-menopause, marriage is over & I’m fat & unfit, so please let me join!

I’m embracing the grey!

This thread is uplifting. Thanks, OP.

I’m 52.

I’ve embraced my grey, am currently doing c25k (and tell everyone about it with the passion of a newly-formed vegan), and am liking the stage of having adult kids.

They’ve not left home yet, but when they do I will be a little sad but will enjoy the literal and metaphorical space.

I'm 50 and have lost weight over the past 12 months - not that I've dieted, I've just changed my way of eating! I am desperately in need of a new job, but I've a primary-aged child who I enjoy having lots of fun with and I enjoy the fun I have being involved with community organisations/events.

Review your makeup. No shimmer, matte only eyeshadow. No face powder. No liner under eye. Define upper lid at lash line. Curling mascara. No matte lipstick.
Apply handcream +++
I am pear shaped, my legs are the best shape they've ever been as weight has shifted to my tummy ( starting to look like a toddler naked).
My skin was oily and spotty when I was younger. It is "normal" now. No spots. Best it's ever been.
No periods after Hysterectomy at 50. Brilliant.

49 years old and jumping, OK not quite jumping as I feel quite stiff in the morning, on this thread !! @Joans I have never mastered
The upper lid eye liner ... any tips ??

I am 55.

I think I am finally menopausal as haven't had a period for 7 months . . . went on BIWI's low carb bootcamp to shift a bit of weight that had collected round my waist, this way of eating seemed to make the hot flushes disappear. I lost too much weight and have had to raise my carb intake a bit and the flushes are making a reappearance, boo!

Recently started a new job in a different industry (still pretty low level though). I am working full time for the first time in 20 years, am learning loads and I am loving it!

There's life in the old girl yet!

I had ds at 45 so being fifty meant school runs and play dates. I took up running and was more fit than I had ever been. Had split from ex so no more negativity dragging me down.
I felt healthy and positive and financially in control. I definitely didn’t embrace grey

I will be 49 this year. I have started couch to 5k and am hoping I will stick with it. I am embracing the grey which is better than I thought. I definitely need to drink more water as I have dry eyes and skin.

I have started a new job which is something completely different for me. I feel anxious alot of the time.

Hello! Good to feel I’m not alone!

I have embraced the grey, I did this a few years ago and I like it but unless I’m wearing strong lipstick I look almost dead. I am going to review my makeup too.

I’ve got in to the most awful habit which has facilitated by weight gain. Leggings and dresses. They’re so comfy but it also means that when I put in jeans they feel so uncomfortable. So I don’t wear them and have a pie instead.

My kids are primary age, and I realise I’ve got into the habit of staying in and saying no to anything that isn’t focussed around them. So I’ve decided to try to say YES to every invitation, even if it’s something I don’t think I fancy. I’m just going to challenge myself to show up, even if I leave early. I don’t really drink and don’t like boozy nights but I’m going to a comedy night and an evening doing fencing! That will hopefully change some habits a bit.

If left to my own devices my instinct is still to climb back into bed and sleep, though.

Manyshades are you anxious about the job or about life in general? I also have anxiety and Prozac keeps it in check just about.

You can definitely regain the oomph!

(This isn't meant to sound lectury, by the way - these are just based on my experiences)

Health - lower carbs, more veg and protein. Absolutely have treats.
Home made cakes with less sugar are lovely and without icings they can be frozen

Exercise - join a friendly club and commit those hours to fitness - twice a week to start with, and you'll get to meet others

Couch to 5K - maybe you could do this when the kids are at school in the mornings? One session takes about 30 mins, give or take.
You don't have to run three times a week - just once a week to get you started.

Hobbies - essential imo - just one thing that you love doing - again, dedicate a couple of hours a week to it to begin with.

Revise your weekly timetable so you can feasibly fit all this in

Alcohol - you don't drink. Neither do I. Best decision I made to go tee total

Post fifties here too, btw, and feeling like i'm early forties

I hope some of that helps

52 last week ....Since turning 50 I have run 3 half marathons (couldn't run for a bus) split up from DP of 18 years (youngest child is 10) started online dating and although I've not met the one I have had over 40 dates in 10 months and made three very good friends and had some lovely evenings with some very nice men. I have also travelled to New York alone. And currently on a long weekend with DS ...I had never driven this far before !
I may be 52 but I'm still a bloody amazing,sexy awesome woman ....I run three times a week,hold down a full time job look after 2 kids a dog and run a house ... it may not be all fantastic and at times I have cried myself to sleep but I've achieved loads and still plan to achieve so much more .....

I’m 50. I’m also not as slim and frankly gorgeous as I was back in the day but I do like some things about being the age I am. I don’t give a toss about a lot of things that used to bother me and that’s great.