Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

If a friend read but didn’t reply to your last 4 texts, what would you do?

32 replies

Halfcharged · 16/02/2020 19:49

Over the course of 5 days I’ve messaged my friend 4 times. Twice in a group chat and then twice individually. All messages were read within half an hour but none have been replied to. This is very unusual. Do I take the hint that she doesn’t want to reply (for whatever reason) and just leave the ball in her court, ask if something’s wrong or give her longer before I text again?

OP posts:
Winterfellismyhome · 16/02/2020 19:50

Id leave it tnh

Xmasbaby11 · 16/02/2020 19:50

5 days isn't long. I thought you were going to say months! Give her longer - she might not be in the mood for responding.

MintySpud · 16/02/2020 19:51

Nothing. I'd assume they were busy.

Halfcharged · 16/02/2020 19:52

Yeh I’m aware 5 days isn’t long at all but 9 times out of 10 she will reply as soon as she reads it so it’s very unusual for her.

OP posts:
lifeisgoodmostofthetime · 16/02/2020 19:53

Phone her and talk to her.

Russellbrandshair · 16/02/2020 19:53

She’s not replied to 4 texts. Fgs just leave it now. She might be unwell or going through something

GroggyLegs · 16/02/2020 19:54

It depends - was she chatty on the group chat? Has anything happened that could be cause for friction?

I have a friend like this, but with her it's true to form & she'd be back in touch at some point.

inicecoldblood · 16/02/2020 19:54

5 days to reply to a quick text is silly. I would assume by now she doesn't want to talk to you. Leave her be now until she contacts you.

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 16/02/2020 19:54

I wouldn’t text again after the second text.

Apocketfulofposies · 16/02/2020 19:55

Aargh I hate this. I would leave it a few days then check in with a ‘hi is everything ok?’

Halfcharged · 16/02/2020 19:59

Thanks everyone. I’ll leave it a few days. She didn’t reply to the group chat at all. It’s just hard to know, as a friend, if I should check in more or give her space. I know she’s ok, she’s got a lovely family at home with her so I’ll back off.

OP posts:
SayrraT · 16/02/2020 21:19

Depends on the friend.

Friend 1 - either text something like 'oi, you ignoring me?!', phone her or go round (disclaimer I know mners don't like people who pop round but I keep my horse at this friend's house and I see her everyday).

Friend 2 - phone or text 'everything OK?'

Other friends - maybe text 'everything OK?' or ignore.

Do you know if there is anything going on in her life? How close are you?

Designerenvy · 16/02/2020 21:22

Phone her or send a text asking is she ok ?
Nobody knows truly what is going on in another persons life. She may just be busy but let her know you care enough to check is she ok .

Blueswede · 16/02/2020 21:34

Perhaps she’s busy? I’m the sort of person who sometimes manages to reply really quickly and other times days can go by before I get round to it. This is why I hate read receipts and seen. Creates unnecessary worry and anxiety!

tabletray · 16/02/2020 21:36

If it were my friend I would think she had lost her phone or that something was wrong because she always answers. I appreciate it may seem like overkill to some but unless I had seen evidence of her actually being ok like using social media etc then I would be going over or contacting her family to check on her

Drinkciderfromalemon · 16/02/2020 21:54

If you were my best mate to whom I do this horribly frequently, she would send me one more text with a stark warning along the lines of: Stop ignoring me. Am assuming the worst, if do not hear from you soonish so I know you are alive, I will get in the car.... She lives 4 hours away and yes, she has got in the car.
I am a pain, she is a fucking awesome friend. Am guessing from the tone though that isnt the type of relationship you two have.

MyuMe · 16/02/2020 22:00

I stopped after 2 texts

It has been nearly 2 years

I still don't know what I did to mortally offend her

But I can see from fb she is still alive

Wannabangbang · 16/02/2020 22:03

She is most probably busy, but if you are ghosted she isn't worth your time. Same happened to me, no idea what i did and she walks past me in the street now. Some people are odd

MaderiaCycle · 16/02/2020 22:03

I’ve had stomach bugs longer than this. She might just be out of commission / need a rest

Sunshine1235 · 16/02/2020 22:07

Maybe it’s me. I haven’t replied to loads of messages recently because I’m pregnant and feeling awful and just can’t really muster up any energy for much at the moment. Also not telling anyone yet so can’t really explain my sudden crap friendship skills. So maybe it’s me, in which case I’m sorry and I’ll be with you properly in a few weeks when this passes

Halfcharged · 17/02/2020 07:35

She replied. Very sorry for not replying, she’d had an awful week with one thing and another but we’re meeting for our catch up tomorrow.

OP posts:
lilmisstoldyouso · 17/02/2020 09:29

Log it with 101.

mencken · 17/02/2020 10:55

use a phone to, you know, make a phone call?

Halfcharged · 17/02/2020 14:26

As I said, she replied.

OP posts:
crapette · 17/02/2020 15:41

use a phone to, you know, make a phone call?

Use your eyes to, you know, read the updates.