Hi all,
I am looking for some advice from social workers and those of you who have been through child and family assessments.
A bit of background, Myself and my (ex) partner have a 2 year old child.
I grew up in a home where we were regularly verbally amused, beaten rather than smacked and as I hit my hit my teens there was some sexual abuse. As a result I suffered with my mental health greatly until falling pregnant whereby I took therapy ,medications and recovery very seriously. As a result I am now stable, a great mum, off my medications but still engaging in weekly therapy to 'stay on top of things'.
My partner also grew up in an abusive household, self harmed as a teen and as a diagnosis of Aspergers.
In the past year my partner has had two severe breakdowns in his mental health both accumulating in a physical assault of myself. Whilst completely unacceptable I was unmarked, but did call the police on each occasion who of course made a DASH referral to social services.
The first incident last spring was the first and in my view the most serious in nature. The police closed their case and social services closed theirs on the phone - much to my surprise. As a result my partner was offered no help and I was left to deal with this myself.
The second incident happened last month, as soon as I realised what was happening I asked him to leave the home, which he did. I rang the police concerned for his safety. Again the DASH referral has been made, social services this time (thankfully!) coming out to do a child and family assessment. Part of me, whilst scared was relieved that we may finally get some help.
Well it's not working out that way. Our social worker, as lovely as she is, is going by the DV text book. And claiming that 'for everyone incident reported to the police 35 more happen in the home' this isn't the case for our family. As a family we are involved with a domestic abuse invention service and my partner has finally initiated mental health treatment. We have done this all off our own backs.
Our social worker has told us they are looking at a child in need plan or a child protection plan. She's disclosed to my therapist that she is pushing for the protection plan and quite honestly I am terrified. I don't listened to, our social worker is communicating with us well and it's desperation pushing to separate our family, we have been open to this - at least on a temporary basis but as these incidents are mental health based even our specialist DV team believe this is a situation that can be rectified and we as a couple can reunite IF he sticks to his MH treatment. Honestly, one BS excuse and I'm gone but it seems Social services are trying to force that anyway.
Any advice?