What are your most difficult mental health symptoms to live with and why?

[SoleBizzz]

Mine are my emotions, going over the past, emotional eating, anxiety about what others have said to me and how they said it with good reason ie being snapped at at work, over thinking,occasional insomnia and hormones/menopause.

How do we lose our stories?

Chronic social anxiety. I only have one old friend (from school days), haven’t managed to make another friend as an adult. I feel very lonely but I’m also terrified of social situations

I’m too scared to even say ‘Morning’ to my colleagues at work, so will only talk to them if it’s work related. I have gone days without saying anything to people at work
I often overhear lots of my seemingly normal colleagues claim they have bad social anxiety (not doubting them btw)
But I also have ASD, and when I think of other socially anxious people I feel it’s their brains tricking them into thinking they’re acting incorrectly etc whereas as I’m autistic it’s like even my Psychiatrist has confirmed yes you’re abnormal i.e., it’s not just in my head

Due to the social anxiety I have very low self esteem and can go through depressive episodes where I lack the motivation to do anything including taking a shower

When I'm in a bad place, or moving towards it again, I get increasingly agoraphobic. Coupled with insomnia it's not easy to get much done, I then feel extra guilty for my DD who loves being out and about. I know too that I always feel better for a trip to the woods or park, but actually forcing myself to leave the 'safety' of home is tough.

Anxiety about leaving the house - it's general anxiety about bad things happening either when I'm out (getting mugged, being in an accident etc.) or bad things happening to my home while I'm out (burglaries etc.). Every time I convince myself it's fine and nothing bad will happen, some real event happens that makes me think "see, I was right, it IS dangerous out there!". For example today I've read news stories that doctors warn people the London underground is a high risk area for catching corona virus...

A bone grindingly exhausting constant sense of no motivation at all due to needing to avoid being overwhelmed. I have days & days where I hide away, sleep, spend hours & hours looking at my phone achieve nothing but the bare minimum because to do more would leave me feeling beyond anxious. This lethargy is anxiety creating in itself.

Also, the fatigue & social anxiety but mostly the lack of any drive at all.

My anxiety, I can cope with my depression but I absolutely hate being anxious. It’s debilitating, I don’t want to leave the house for fear of something happening

*Procrastination? Comfort eating? Napping?
I'm definitely guilty of those, but would not have characterized them as mental health problems. Its interesting that others do. How do you determine whether something is a mental health difficulty or an aspect of your personality or character or simply a choice that you make?

I appreciate the comments about lack of mental health awareness above. This is not a heady post, I am trying to understand better how others see it.*

If they are not a problem for you, then they are not a problem for you. But others they can be overwhelming.

Imagine at least one of those things expanding to fill your head and world. They make you fill shit about yourself, you don't feel like you can overcome them. Obsession, self-hatred over something that everyone else appears to cope with. Now imagine someone dismissing it as a "choice", when it is actually beyond your control.

It's not the action itself but inability of mind to overcome it or - more pertinently - the deep-rooted cause.

It's not to do with "responsibility" or "pulling yourself together". It's a mind that can't function properly that shows this by having abnormal responses to everyday issues.

It's like the opposite of that question "how do you know when you're in love?" "Ah you just know". If the question is "how to you know your mind is fucked?" The same answer: "You just know".

Insomnia, intrusive thoughts, feeling like your juggling a bunch of thoughts you don't want.

By the way for me: obsessive thoughts about the past, regrets about only having one child and no friends. (Oh and drinking too much and arguments with imaginary people!). I have developed workoholism to quieten my mind. Which makes every worse again, but only for 2 hours a day

Enough, surely you can see how procrastination is a mental health issue?

I have procrastinated so much over basic tasks such as tooth brushing that I now have permanent bone loss so am going to lose a number of teeth.

Yet I keep on procrastinating because I start to panic every time I think about doing basic tasks. Standing up on a stage and giving a speech? I’m fine with that. Getting a shower and brushing my teeth? I need at least four hours due to panic and procrastination.

whowantstogotothepark You have summed it up perfectly

@Enoughisenoughhhhh, comfort eating is a means to self soothe for me. I feel very safe in my bed, even safer if I am eating. I have an entire ritual around bed eating. It involves deciding on food, doing what needs to be done to acquire it, prepping my bed, finding just the right kindle book to read, settling in bed, eating and reading.

Does anyone experience telephone anxiety? Having to speak on the phone to anyone (even friends) is exhausting. I especially dislike ringing for appointments. I have a fear the respondent is going to be angry or annoyed by my request.

@SoleBizzz, thank you for making this thread. It has helped me feel less weird and alone.

@SecretWitch yes to the telephone anxiety. Appointments are also a massive thing for me too. I always imagine I sound clunky asking for an appointment...I can't think of a better way to describe it.
I'll literally do anything to avoid making a phone call. It's ridiculous.

@JesusHChristOnABike, thank you for responding. I always feel like I’m putting on a fake voice when I must request an appointment. I also rehearse in my head what I want to say before ringing. I think this is triggered by the long time receptionist at my physicians office who has been very unpleasant to me in the past.

Anxiety often health anxiety.

I'm not too worried about calling it mental health symptoms, emotional crap, whatever, it all swirls round as one really for me. My most challenging one is 3am self-hatred wake up calls. They are a bitch and I have sabotaged so much due to listening to that snippy, judgemental voice.

*I am genuinely surprised by some of the things listed here.

Procrastination? Comfort eating? Napping?
I'm definitely guilty of those, but would not have characterized them as mental health problems. Its interesting that others do. How do you determine whether something is a mental health difficulty or an aspect of your personality or character or simply a choice that you make?

I appreciate the comments about lack of mental health awareness above. This is not a heady post, I am trying to understand better how others see it.*

Its doing those things in excess. So a Sunday afternoon nap. no problem.

When I am at a low point, I will nap constantly, for hours. Get up for half hour and go for another nap because it's the only time I am safe from the intrusive, horrible thoughts.

Procrastinating so long that you haven't showered in days and are hopelessly behind on work and haven't changed your sheets in months. That would be a symptom rather than just ordinary, "never mind, we'll wash up tomorrow" procrastination.

Panic attacks, especially in public.

Also insomnia, anxiety, rumination and procrastination and the dreaded dreadful deep depression I get hormonally. But all of those are private, I can't stand drawing attention to myself

Constantly on edge. Checking myself and being hyper vigilant about my bodily sensations as panic's physical sensations have me running scared and I never know when it's going to creep up on me.
This last week my focus has been on throat sensations and feeling like I can't breathe.
A couple of weeks ago I felt I couldn't breathe and now I am terrified it's going to happen again. My throat and neck muscles feeling 'strange' and like they will spasm.

The last couple of weeks I’d say emetophobia as my kids had a bug. However for the most part it’s been a lot better over the last few years.

Anxiety generally. Everything. Jumping to conclusions, catastrophising, unbelievable paranoia about people hating me.

Emotional volatility is bad, although the highs don’t really exist now. So I’m just pretty low all the time. I feel really needy too due to some trauma I’m working through.

Self harm is reaching the point of “out of control”.

Wanting to be in bed or on the sofa all the time.

Yy to not wanting to do something because of a feeling of getting it wrong - that's a huge one for me.

Eating junk.

Any self-care. Exercise, getting enough sleep, even cleaning my teeth can be too much sometimes.

Mood swings - the tiniest thing can completely change my mood & when it's at its worst I get so overwhelmed I genuinely can't even speak. If I'm pushed when I'm in that state then I just shout at everyone & I'm not a lot of fun to be around!

I'm also completely anti-social. I get really sensitive to any perceived slight & generally assume no-one actually likes me. I refuse any invitations to socialise because I think people are only inviting me because they feel sorry for me or out of some obligation but don't actually want me there.

Daydreaming. It gets really debilitating because I feel like I have to get through the story but will keep going over bits of the story & trying out alternative ways for things to happen. Meanwhile, the kids need feeding, or I should've gone to bed 2 hours ago, or I'm supposed to be going out somewhere...

Does anyone else get that horrible feeling, i was trying to explain it today as ive had it on and off last 2 days (period, hormones always trigger it) its a feeling of like being in a dream world or like not being here, i just find ot so hard to explain.

Anxiety is a biggy & can be crippling. Also paranoia which is linked to the menopause. And I have a tendency to get a bit obsessive/needy ( have lost friends through this). I think that’s to do with anxiety & extreme people pleasing. Facebook can be a nightmare for me!
I drink too much trying to deal with stress ( mainly DD & all her issues).

I feel like my brain is on the divide between the lanes of a motorway and my thoughts are the cars whizzing past at 100 miles an hour. I can't slow them down enough to get to safety.

My main ones that affect me most significantly are insomnia, skin picking, procrastination. Procrastination for me is an inability to deal with things even, on my worst days, reading texts and emails in case in turns out to be something else I have to do or give headspace to. On those days, my DH reads stuff for me and filters it into stuff I do need to deal with and non-important stuff as I lose the ability to evaluate that for myself.