How many people can you phone out of the blue to chat about nothing?

[HaroldBishopsMemoryLoss]

I did a search to see if there were old threads on this and I’m sure there are, but I couldn’t find any.

Sometimes if I’m walking to the train or en route somewhere, I like to call people ‘just because’. I’ve often thought there’s only really two people I can do this with - my DH and my mum. I’m lucky I at least have two and I know I won’t always have that.

I did think it was a bit sad though that at the age of 42, there are only two people I can do this with.

My dad and I don’t chat on the phone; my sister and I don’t have that type of relationship. I used to have a close friend I could do this with, but she moved abroad and there’s a time difference now. I do have friends, but if I wanted a chat it would be more normal to text and arrange it in advance, and nowadays people mostly just text. I don’t have kids either, and always think people with kids are likely always to be busy. I couldn’t just ‘descend’ on them with an unexpected phone call about nothing.

Is this normal, or am I a bit of a sad sack for only having two people in the whole world I can do this with?

I suppose thinking about this is making me sad, so if people reply saying ‘I have about ten people I can ring up out of the blue just to chew the cud with’ I may end up a bit depressed!

Just one.

2 - Same as you OP, my OH and mum.

Phew - thanks for the replies so far. You’ve both made me feel better!

1. My DH, my DM, my DF & my grandparents

Only my DP!! Maybe my DB who is 57.
Both parents have long died.

I think most people tend to text now. I do ring an old school friend on the first Thursday of the month. We both keep it free for a natter!

I don't have anyone who I can call, ever really. I only call my parents to update them on DD, we don't have a close relationship. I think I've spoken to one friend on the phone in the past 3 years, and that was because she had a pregnancy scare. So if you're a sad sack OP, I dread to think what I am.

Same here, OP. I also don't have kids, so I leave people who have them to it, not wanting to disturb.

DP, DF, DM, 1 x friend and an aunt. So 5 possibly?

I tend to do this with my mum and dad. Can do it on an evening with my oldest/closest friend but that's it. Wouldn't even bother phoning DH for a natter because I live with him and we do that every day at home anyway.

I hate talking on the phone, it stresses me out no end but my granny is 86 and lives some distance away. She is the only person I'll phone up to chat shit with.

I don't mind too much as she makes me laugh like a drain - she's still sharp as a tack.

Thanks all - you’re reassuring me that I’m not totally unusual. I had no idea if I really was an anomaly or if people really had legions of people they could do this with!

@madmother1 that’s a nice idea to have a specific day reserved to catch up with a friend.

@amusedbush that is great to hear about your 86 year old granny.

Husband, mum (but only when my dads not there, and he’s retired now), and youngest daughter, although I don’t get a word in edgeways.

I have a few ‘messenger’ friends, who I chat with about nothing, but I wouldn’t ring them. It feels intrusive, although I’d be happy if they rang me.

Only 4, my siblings, my mum and my DH.

I don't encourage phone calls with others. I prefer to talk face to face.

Technically one, my husband but I loathe chatting on the phone and would prefer the silence or messaging him on WhatsApp. I don't do conversational phone chats.

My Mum, that’s all. It’s very lonely. No partner and I don’t have that kind of relationship with my siblings.

None. Big family but not very close. Partner isn't the chatty phonecall type.

@HaroldBishopsMemoryLoss

She's such a good egg. My grandad died two years ago so I'm trying to enjoy the time I have left with her

I don’t like when people ring me to kill time. Especially if they’re driving and then you hear them park and turn off the engine and they say “anyway I better go”. I’m not your in-car entertainment!

It’s interesting how some people are just not phone chatters. I am conscious of that, which is why I don’t try and intrude on people who are good friends, but aren’t in my ‘can call for no bloomin’ reason’ list.

@MayFayner ha yes - my DH does this to me!

@DarkDarkNight

I’m sorry about that. I do understand how you feel.

About 20? Of that I'd say maybe half friends, and half family?
I'm lucky to have a large close knit family, and a lot of good friends.

Mum dad and brother .