Will getting a cleaner change my life?

[ScarletGranita]

Tell me about the difference a cleaner has made to your life.

I've resisted getting one for years for lots of possibly stupid reasons, including the fact that I felt guilty and lazy about employing someone (probably another woman) to clear up the mess of three/four able-bodied people.

But today I'm off work with a virus and instead of resting I've spent the morning cleaning and tidying up and I'm knackered and resentful.

I live with my DH, my teenage ds and my DFather. DH is not bad, could be better, could be worse, does his bit in cleaning terms but is untidy with his hobby stuff, paperwork etc. DS - well, his room is pretty standard-teenage-boy but he does have chores and he does them, more or less. DF is a tidy sort generally but 'doesn't notice dirt hahahaha' (love him but aaargh). The house is lovely but old and dusty and full of old furniture and knick-knacks and, oh yeah, we also have two cats who shed everywhere.

My standards are definitely not high in MN terms and I don't want a show home but I'm fed up with the place always looking a bit dismal.

DH and I work long hours and we could afford to pay a cleaner to come in for a couple of hours a week just to keep things ticking over. But I still can't get rid of this feeling that it's a bit crap and entitled and lazy to pay someone else to mop your kitchen floor.

Tell me I'm being an idiot and that getting a cleaner will improve my life beyond measure

Oh. Mine is amazing! However she doesn’t just clean. She tidies. She reorganises. She’s phenomenal!

Mine costs me £40 per week

She sounds amazing herringbone! How may hours does that cover?

£24 a week for two hours and it absolutely is life changing.

I don't have a cleaner as my DD does it all, but I organised one for my DM. She pays her £25 for two hours and is brilliant. Happy to iron, clean a specific area, turn out and clean kitchen cupboards, and because she keeps on top of it, quite often there's not enough for her to do once a week so she checks in advance and skips a week. DM is nearly 90 and just out of hospital and her cleaner has dropped in a few times to check that she's ok, so to me she's gold dust.

The only trouble is that DM feels compelled to clean before the cleaner arrives.

And to be sure to conceal any pink gin 😀.

I can understand a cleaner for your 90-year-old mum lobster and she sounds great.

I suppose that's where I feel a bit odd about it though - as if a cleaner is a daft luxury for us whereas I can see how it would be a godsend for your mum.

@ScarletGranita when I was commuting to London, working full time and was a sole parent (only one child), it was a godsend then too, and didn't feel like a luxury in the slightest! I considered that I was earning enough money to pay a very small amount to someone else, and could give my DD back the hours to do more fun things with her, rather than cleaning.

Odd that DD 22 is now obsessed with cleaning ....

I would go for it. If it doesn't work for whatever reason, you have no obligation to continue. I would obtain recommendations from people you know and suggest a month's trial period - on both sides, obviously.

Maybe get someone to come weekly to give the kitchen and bathroom(s) a good scrub and to clean the hall, stairs and landing.

The rest is then manageable between the four of you - perhaps your dad tidies, and the three of you clean.

Yes!

My elderly parents have an awesome cleaner. She comes once a week for 4 hours. She changes beds, cooks a nice dinner, does washing and cleaning and organises medication for the week.

I have a cleaner once a fortnight. Like you I wasn't keen on the idea of having a cleaner, and I am very happy with the compromise of her coming just once a fortnight. She does a deep clean and change the beds, I do some superficial cleaning in between. I definitely recommend it!

There's loads of things you pay people to do because you don't want to do it yourself. Would you feel as bad about having someone to do the garden? Going out for a meal when you could cook yourself? Having a decorator when you could do it?

These people are in the cleaning profession to earn a living, and without people paying them to clean they wouldn't be able to do that.

My thought on it is that you might as well make your life easier while giving someone a bit of extra work who's looking for it. It's a win win. I always make sure I get mine a brew if she's not rushing off, and give her little treats every now and again, as she's worth way more than she gets paid!

I have mine every other week and she is absolutely amazing. She does all the jobs I never seem to have time to get round to doing. She is here at least 3 hours and charges £30. I would be lost without her and it's lovely walking in to a clean house.

2 childless able bodied people here - cleaner 2 hours a week, £25. Bloody love it. Yes it’s a luxury but we can afford it and it makes life so much easier. We have to tidy a reasonable amount for her which is motivation to do so, but she just keeps on top of everything - bathroom, kitchen, general dusting and hoovering. The bathroom particularly is my nemesis (ours just seems to attract dust and hair) and it’s so nice to have it just kept to a basic standard. If you can afford it why wouldn’t you?

Ours does a couple of hours on a Friday and is amazing. I would cut back on other luxuries before I cut back on her - she makes my life so much easier just being here and getting stuff done.

I work away often and find that between work and the DC there's never enough time to get everything done and stay on top of it. I wouldn't be without her now.

We also have a dog walker who is equally indispensible and has changed our lives. Paying for services like this isn't something you should feel embarrassed about - it keeps them in work, frees up your time to do whatever you need to do and ensures an easier life.

I know it's daft SunshineAngel and I agree with your points about the garden etc. I mean, my grandparents had a 'housekeeper' and a gardener back in the 70s and they never seemed to feel any angst over it!

Now I just need to persuade dad to let someone come in and clean once a fortnight...

Are you all at home when your cleaner comes or do they have keys?

On the subject of guilt .

Do you pay someone to service your car or cut your hair ? Why when some people do that themselves ?

Do you buy clothes or bread from the shops ? Why? Lots of Mn sew or knit their own clothes and bake their own bread.

Do you feel guilty about buying jam? Don’t you think you should because I make my own.

Do your husband, father and teenage son feel guilty about you tidying and cleaning up after them? Funny how they don’t feel bad about you doing their share of the housework FOR FREE but you feel guilty about paying someone the going rate.

Think about who is going to tidy up before the cleaner arrives. It’s not fair to expect them to clean messy rooms. Whose job will it be to eg tidy DF or Ds bedroom ? Will they stop doing the little they do now “ because thats the cleaners job”?

In that case, will the cleaner be reducing their work and not yours?

So go and think about these things, give you head a wobble and hire a cleaner ASAP.

I really don’t understand why you would consider it lazy or demeaning to outsource cleaning. How is it different to using a mechanic for basic work or paying a window cleaner or handyman or even paying for a takeaway. These are all things people could technically do themselves.

There is nothing intrinsically demeaning about cleaning. A skilled professional cleaner is choosing to earn their living by cleaning. There’s no shame in paying them to clean so you can spend that time elsewhere. It sounds like you already allocate those extra hours to work which is probably makes it a financially sound decision to outsource cleaning. What isn’t sensible is making yourself ill cleaning when you’re poorly for some dubious moral reasons.

In case you can’t tell, we have a cleaner . She’ll continue coming while I’m on maternity leave with dc3 and I feel no guilt about that whatsoever.

She has a key, she comes when we’re at work

She has a key but I’m often here for part of the time she is. She is brilliant!

I don't think my DF would allow his room to be cleaned tbh. But yes, good point about the tidying up.

I do worry that DH might decide that he doesn't have to lift a finger 'because that's the cleaner's job'!

Well I'm sat here in my day off, watching Traffic Cops and MNing..... Cleaner comes at 9am, I go out for coffee. Two hours and £20 later, all done.

Keeps us tidier and makes me happy.

Two ablebodued adults here, no kids but work full time. I'm admittedly dyspraxic so really struggle to be tidy, nonetheless my DH has no excuse and it's just that hes less tidy than I would like us to be. Coming home on a Tuesday each fortnight after our cleaner has been is such a wonderful feeling. You may need to try a few to find one that suits - mine is brilliant as she tidies too and will reorganise things if she thinks we are being daft (she is always right!). I wouldn't go without now.

Oh yes, and she does whatever she sees needs doing. So last week had left our bed unmade, to do when I got home.... She did it.

She feeds the cats, takes in parcels, got tomato stains out of DD's carpet that I'd given up on, all sorts.

Wish I could afford to have her be a full on housekeeper!