Is there a special training school that partners go to.....

[FlamingoAndJohn]

....where they get taught how to stand exactly in the fucking way all the time?

Honestly, dh stood in front of the shoe cupboard when I was trying to get my shoes and then I needed to get in the kitchen when I needed to go in their to get my keys.
Then at various points throughout the day he just stood in the bloody way.

Does your partner do that or did they go on a different training course.

DP has actually just graduated with a masters in "Getting in the fucking way".

His favourite place to stand is in doorways - either the kitchen or the bedroom doorway which are directly opposite each other. The second I get home from work and have to ho between the two to make a coffee, feed the cat, get changed, use the bathroom, he's there, in the way, at every turn. I wouldn't mind if he had a reason to be there but he literally just gets up when I come home to stand there and do fuck all while I try to dance around about him. Then he acts all hurt when I ask him if he actually needs something or could he please piss off and let me get in the door.

Both DH & DS went to 'Where's my' class.

DH graduated with honours from 'Getting In The Way In The Kitchen' class, with a special in 'Getting A Clean Plate / Cutlery / Utensil Out Of The Cupboard When There Is Already One Out'

@weenurse if you find that school let me know! My dog leaves his toys everywhere! I went to work once and pulled a raggedy teddy out of my bag!

My DH graduated this course with first class honours. His particular favourite is wanting to make a cup of tea whilst I'm cooking on the hob, the hob is next to the kettle and I can't really do anything about that because of where the plug socket is. He's can't possibly wait until I am not cooking.

Does anyone else's partner eat the last bag of crisps and then put the empty multipack back in the cupboard? Drives me bonkers.

Definitely My DP, both DC and the bloody dog came top of their class on that course...I'm so very proud

Likewise they all excelled at saying no to food 5 times before suddenly being desperate to eat as I cook my own dinner (I eat differently to the rest of them ), needing the loo the second I have got into the bath and uttered that blissful sigh, oh and physically knowing the second I have sat down to tell that they need something (except for DP if he does it he is told to bugger off and do it himself).

Sad to report they have all failed at the following courses....
Emptying the dishwasher,, identifying mess as they walk past it , actually getting washing into the basket and not on the floor (actually I may have failed that one myself and as dp does all the washing he should be moaning here )

I would suggest resits but frankly my Hope's are not high.....I'm relying on the continuing development system of when they move out and their families do it to them

Sadly the DC are 7 and 4 so I've a while to wait for my revenge

Oh and DP has a distinction in " eat the last sodding egg every time shiny wants to eat it in the next hour and not bloidy mention it "

Only eggs nothing else.......every sodding time

My DH loves to get in my way and has then perfected a bewildered/hurt expression when I am annoyed. That takes it to a new level.

Mine has studied this to PhD level. Every morning he stands right in front of the washing machine and the cupboard where my vital morning meds are kept, buttering toast agonisingly slowly, despite there being another perfectly good worktop that he's been asked to use about four million times, huffing and sighing as I reach past him and crawl around at his feet trying to get a load in to wash while the kettle boils. He literally makes and eats some toast in the mornings. I have to do my breakfast, DS's breakfast, the dog's breakfast, DS's packed lunch, take my meds and get the laundry in, and I can do the lot quicker than he can make and butter one slice of toast if he will only stand three feet further down the kitchen to do it.

My DH went to the school of leaving every fecking cupboard door open. I have to follow him round shutting draws and doors after he makes a cup of tea —and forgets where the cups, spoons, tea are all kept—

Strikeout fail

My FWB is 6’9” so he kind of can’t help but be in the way... He’s not here that often and is lush though so I don’t mind that much!

@FlamingoAndJohn Well I could persuade DH to stay in bed a bit longer and stay out of my way, but on the other hand, I wouldn't get my cup of tea brought up to me in bed every morning.

My DH bypassed the “where is my” class and went straight for the advanced “where have you put my” class, gaining automatically a black belt in not only losing his stuff but trying to make it my fault.

My DD who is 14 is one of the best at 'walk over it don't pick it up' and 'if I dont see it, it's not there'

Father and son both have taken courses in opening the bloody curtains when it's light and shutting the damn things when it's dark, with son taking an extra credit in leaving the bloody light on.

Oh my DH has done the ‘going into a room with the curtains drawn and turning the lights on rather than opening the curtains and leaving the lights on’ evening class.