Mortifying incident at work

[mortifedtoday]

I've done something really unprofessional and have been called out. Ages ago a client overheard me saying some less than unflattering things about them. Another colleague was on the phone and unbeknown to me had to put the call on hold while asking me something about this client. The client is tricky, difficult and generally annoying. This isn't an excuse, but mentioned for context.

A few days later they phoned back and mentioned to my colleague that they had overheard the conversation. Nothing more was said.

Today the client has called and spoken to me about something else. She didn't agree with the charge we are making for something. Not something I have control over and cannot be changed, it is what it is. During her first call she was fine and didn't mention the other incident. When I emailed her about the change she called back to question it and because I couldn't help/change it she then told me how rude I'd been a few months ago, calling my unprofessional and unedifying. I agree, it was out of order and I apologised, but I feel terrible.

There shouldn't be any repercussions at work as she is known to be difficult and not well liked, but I feel I need to make amends. Do I email and apologise again, or should I just leave it? Safe to say, lesson learnt and I will be making sure I don't do it again!

I would just leave it..you have apologised once. Grovelling to her will give her reason to be even more obnoxious in future...

Ignore and learn from it

I agree, leave it. You’ve apologised. However, were I the client (or your line manager), I’d be deeply unimpressed you didn’t apologise at the time, AND that I had to be the one to raise the subject several months later. You sound deeply unprofessional, and as if you thought keeping your head down was the way to go.

If it's already in writing I'd apologise again. If not, I'd leave it. Depending on relationships. I'd let my manager know as wouldn't want them to hear it elsewhere.

I was the mistaken recipient of a less than flattering email about myself when I was a client of a big advertising firm. It was also totally unfounded (moaning about something that, on the same email chain, can be seen to have come from the agency side and not my side). She wrote an apology card and that was enough for me but - from their side, they pulled her straight off our (very large and prestigious) account and she had left the agency a few months later.

I'm agency side how and meticulously careful about what I say and write!

Leave it now, what’s done is done & you’ve apologised. The more you make of it the more she’ll feel empowered to take it further.

Lesson learnt!

The charge she wants waived and the things you said are two totally separate issues. Sounds like she is raising it now as retaliation for the charge not being waived. Ignore her.

To be honest at the time I didn't know she was referring my me. I wasn't told. All I knew was that the client had overheard 'someone' talking and there were several of us having the conversation so it could have been any one of us. It was only when she called today and name-called me that I assumed it was my part of the conversation she heard. Like I said, I'm mortified and embarrassed and am not normally so unprofessional.

If there’s nothing in writing then leave it at that.

But, as you probably know, you should have apologised at the time “ages ago” when it was raised with your colleague.

Agree with Sleeveen - you should have apologised at the time, as soon as you became aware she had heard. If I were the client, that is what I would be unhappy about: it was silly to make remarks about her, but I am sure we have all done something similar at some point, so it's forgivable. But failing to apologise was deeply unprofessional.

Cross-post with your update: in that case, one of you should have taken the lead for apologising on behalf of you all. I'm amazed the client is still with you tbh.

That's what I think Sprout. She was perfectly pleasant during the first call, asked me how I was etc.

The apology was made at the time by my colleague on behalf of everyone, hence my surprise that it has been brought up again today.

X-posted with your update.

So did nobody apologise to this person for the collective unprofessionalism when it was roses with your colleague?

It was probably only after the first phone call where she was perfectly pleasant that she recognised your voice and realised it was you slagging her off.

Yes, an apology was made at the time on behalf of everyone.

once upon a time, many years ago, i was a Civil Servant. i had a large caseload of difficult clients, some more batshit than others. one day, one of my most notorious clients called, and began ranting as usual, every word more nonsensical than the previous one.

i pressed the ‘Silent’ button on the phone and said for FUCKS sake, it’s Client X again and they are hammered. i am so TIRED of being a verbal punchbag for their alcoholic paranoia.

except i had my finger on number 2, which was not the ‘Silent’ button at all. the client heard every word i said. i panicked and put the phone down. they called back and i pretended to be someone else, put them through to my manager who assumed it was their ‘usual’ rant and placated them.

i learned a valuable lesson that day about professionalism in the workplace.

say no more about it, OP. but make sure you are never anything but professional in future...

Thank you all. I think I'll leave it and not say any more. She will be calling on Monday to have a moan about the charge with my colleague again then, so unless she brings it up again, I will leave it. Lesson well and truly learnt.

I would mention it to your line manager - if you have't already - because otherwise it will be hanging over you. If I were your manager, I'd rather know about it in advance than have it dropped on me out of the blue.

I had a similar issue at work - not a client but a contractor who is known to be a pain in the arse. He didn't like my e-mail tone and said if he saw it again he would complain to my manager. I replied saying that I was sorry he felt that way and that I'd put this in front of my manager already (who agreed with me, not him). He shut up and now I exchange nothing other than bare civility.

As you've apologised in person and an apology was made to her at the time I'd just carry on as normal. If she does raise it again all you can do is apologise again
I'm guessing that you've definitely learned a lesson from this incident.
I'll bet the next massively overused word on Mumsnet will be deeply

I agree with PP though that you shouldn't apologise again to this client for this incident.

Never admit to anything in writing.

I'd likely warn your colleague, but not mention it to the client again

My manager doesn't get on well with this person either and they've had some run-ins before in the past. He also knows about the incident. Thank you all, I feel a bit better now.

Have a hug, OP. You’re human, occasionally we make mistakes and some people are absolute pains and the office environment is so artificial anyway. You’ve apologised, leave it at that and forgive yourself, even if she can’t.

Your colleague needs to learn to use the mute function for this reason.

I'd leave it but learn from it.