Early morning wakings out of hand. Any tips that don't involve a sodding groclock.

[Belleende]

My 4 year old has never slept in the morning later than 6.30am. she now wakes every day between 5am and 5.30. Today was 4.44am. she can be moderately quiet for a bit but then just gets noiser and noiser. We had trained her to stay out of our room until 6am at the earliest but this seems to have gone out the window. She came into me at 5am this morning. I was not very nice to her, but I am facing the week from hell and don't want to be woken at 5am.

we have tried everything. Gro clock, she unplugs, she has a clock on her wall, worked for a while now she ignores, taking her back and back and back, she just thinks it is a game. She just wakes up and Bing! That is her up for the day. What can we do to encourage her to go back to sleep instead of wake the house?

What time is her bedtime? I have an early riser. He went through a similar phase. Although the odd late night has no effect, moving his bedtime a bit later did after a while.

There is no magic cure though, so children just seem to need less sleep then others.

Mine were both like your child. We tried a black out blind which helped a bit - DD is 11 now and I find it hard prizing her out of bed now lol

Do you think she's hungry, cold? Heard noises (heating?)

Bribes? Sticker for everyday she stays quiet until x time then big present when she gets required # of stickers? Sometimes it helps to reset a habit.

Watching with interest as I have one of these except his regular waking time is between 5-5.30 and it’s now before 5am.

We’ve had great success with Wake-to-sleep method but this time it doesn’t work beyond the days when I actually wake him at 3.30am (he the sleeps until just after 6). As soon as I stop doing it, he’s back to early waking so the routine hasn’t been broken.
It’s absolutely killing me!

I have an early riser op. What time is your DC bedtime?

Mine are in bed between 6 and 7 and sleep through till 6 at the latest. Eldest usually 5 or 5.30

What I have definitely come to realise is that I can't have it all ways. I can either have a long quiet evening to myself or get up later but not both.

I chose my quiet evening as this works better for me and DC for the moment and I pop myself in bed about 10.30pm and get up whenever eldest gets up.

Oh an I DO put my foot down for before 5am. He has a 'sodding groclock' that lets him know that ge has to stay in his room and play/read quietly. (Toilet visit excepted)

If she unplugs her gro clock then she needs sanctions! Not bribes to stay in bed!

It’s naughty behaviour, and 4 is old enough to know that. You set a time for her to stay in her room until, and she needs to stick to it. She can get up and look at a book, play quietly - but she stays in her room until a respectful time.

You really need to be firm about this. 5am wake ups when you work are not sustainable!

By 4 I just said you can play in your room quietly but mummy and daddy are not to be woken before 6am (we used the clock on the wall, groclock was sabotagable but they understand that the wall clock can be checked and might fall down and get broken if they tried to get it down isn't to be touched).

A CD player with audio books has been helpful for all my children - one got up a lot in the night and the other two slept through but got up at 5:30am by choice until they were 7 or 8. They could be trained out of disturbing us before 6am unless they were ill or had had a bad dream from 3 and a half though, and by 5 we introduced 7am at weekends, 6am Monday to Friday.

I actually think it helped them at school as they were all completely comfortable with days of the week and telling the time (o'clock only) on an analogue clock when they started, which most children aren't

They were allowed to leave their rooms for the toilet and to fill their water bottles - we didn't use stairgates on their doors. They were all night dry by 3.5 (I'm pretty convinced this is the up side of light sleeping children) which meant they had to be allowed to go to the toilet obviously.

Im watching with interest too, my 4yo KNOWS he isn't allowed up until the gro clock sun comes up. Its complicated by him sharing a room with his big brother whom he wakes as entertainment if forced back to bed, its driving me nuts. He just cannot seem to understand that its not on to wake the rest of the household once he's up. Hard to enforce in the week as my husband's alarm goes off at 6.15 but even on weekends with no alarms he's doing it!

Bedtime between 7-8pm depending on the day due to activities for the older one.

I agree with WellErr. This is naughtiness.

You need to make it worth her while to stay in her room (sodding Groclock plugged in) until the time you’ve set it for. Rapid return with no words and a very stern face if she doesn’t. Tons of praise and an immediate prize (sticker?) when she manages it. Five stickers mean a bigger prize (get her to choose).

You probably need your DH (if you have one) to help as the rapid return is hard on your own. But remember, you really want to solve this and you can out-stubborn a 4yo!

Every child is different and all the helpful "black out blinds/tell her to read the clock/earlier/later bedtime etc" may work for one but obviously won't be a magic solution for all. My kids knew instantly they could just the fucking clock off. They would wake sodding EARLIER when the groclock was used because they would then wait for it to come on, but would wake so early they started to get restless and bored.
With one child, age was the curing solution to his waking at stupid o clock - he's always been a very early riser like his dad, and now wakes at 6am which for him is good. Hes also old enough now at 6 to play in his room until the hpusehold is up. With the middle.one, it was a much later bedtime that the others to get her to wake later.She's a bit of a scatty-brained child though and often forgets to just stayin her room with her sistet because shes got so much going on in her head she wants to discuss immediately with us (trainingis ongoing!). The younger one is only just turning four and will wake between 5.30 and 6.30, depending on a variety of factors. She comes in to us quietly which is fine.

Children at 4 aren't "naughty" for fucks sake as pp said If they come in your room too early - it's just going to require constant "training" to get them to remember to stay in their room until mum and dad are awake. For example, keep taking them back to bed, repeating ad infinitum "if mum and dad's bedroom light isn't on, it's not time to come out of your room" or whatever works for you etc.

They really arent being naughty at 4.

Some vculdren really dont like being home alone at night which is how it feels. We wpildnt leave them for 2 hours without supervision or the odd chat any other time of day would we?

I think some children will go back to sleep and some will play/do the gro clock but I dont think you should punish those who cant, that kist adds another layer of fear around waking and being on your own.

We had early wakers. Now they're older they are fine. I wish I knew what magic happened in between....

I think for about a year I had a kid come in at 4am and sleep with me as I was just desperate to get back to sleep. It worked though.

Bed at 6pm then surprised your dc is awake early? Really?

I never understood the routine of such an early bedtime, so so prohibitive to be tied to the house every night by 6pm. Plus by my reckoning they're having tea at 4.30-5pm? If they're not having something else to eat before bed are they waking up hungry? My two would have chewed their own arms off for food after 4.30pm to 7am expected mealtimes?

Sorry op, no advice other than you can't have a quiet child-free evening AND 7am risers.

I think 4yos can be naughty. Deliberately turning off a Groclock is, to my mind, being naughty.

Now, if they’re terrified of the dark, have recently had a traumatic experience, have only ever slept with mum then there’s a reason and my suggested approach wouldn’t work.

But OP didn’t say anything about the background, so I assumed none of those things were in play.

A 4yo at school has to follow instructions, and they mostly manage. This isn’t no different. And I think that quiet time in the morning isn’t necessarily a bad thing - I credit it with making my DCs excellent readers!

Oh I missed the bedtime at 6!! Well that will so it then! You cant have it both ways...

SquashedFlyBiscuit the 6pm bedtime is not the OP, it's another poster (who asks the OP whether she has a similarly early bedtime).

6pm bedtime? Mine would be starving, she wakes hungry every morning. I doubt shes waking because shes naughty and wants to piss you off .mine dd is a bad sleeper but if she goes before 730-8 or doesn't have a snack around 7 like toast, or muffin, yogurt she'll definitely be up at 5 instead of 7.
Try a snack and , later bedtime . Is there any heating on a timer that might click and bang around a bit?
Good luck I know early starts are a killer!!

Sorry op just read you dont have a 6pm bedtime!

Watching my 13 month old goes through phases of 2am or 4 am wanting to get up ... I don’t let him but results in me being up between 2-4 hours before he falls back to sleep ... being back at work it’s not great ... touch wood not every day but starting to become more regular

By 4, we'd given up any hope that he would sleep in (5.30 was a lie in), and had just said that if he got up early he could play quietly or look at his books in bed. He wasn't allowed to come into us until 7* - he had a digital clock and knew to look for the number 7 at the start of the time.

If he got up he was summarily taken back to bed. We also had a stair gate across our bedroom door for a long time to physically prevent him coming in.

• we did say it was ok to come in if he was feeling ill etc.

This is going to sound counter intuitive, but aged 4.5, my early waker asked for an alarm clock for christmas. He got in, and surprisingly is was almost immediate in its effect at him sleeping longer - possibly because he knew it wasnt time to get up without having to wake fully to check.
Yes, it meant for years, we had an alarm go at 6am with never any chance of him sleeping later, but it pretty instantly knocked the 4 and 5am starts on their head.

We are now allowed (aged 10) to switch it off at weekends, but he is still usually reading at 6am (and awake before then.....)

We used to say at night, "what will you do i the morning if uou wake up before X" and have a book out to read and some toys BUt I think this was at 5...

Talking about it the night before in a positive light seemed to help that that was The Plan, also we changed what we left put so made A Thing of it so it was more entiicng. Almost - Ooooh you can play with x in the morning.

It is such a hard phase but the good thing is it isnt forever. Its hard to lose sight that theg arent doing it on purpose to ruin your sleep but are awake and dont know how to be by themsleves for that time yet.

You can't force people to sleep (unless you drug them) else no one would suffer from insomnia!

You seem to have a list of what she's not allowed to do, but does she know what she is allowed to do. I find this more effective. When DS wakes up he has to:
Shut his window
Put jumper/dressing gown on.
He is allowed to:
Go to the loo
Get a drink of water
Turn light on
Play quietly in room
Go to the sofa and look at books
Come into my bed for a hug/sleep but no talking