I don't want to be around my child

[lol098]

I feel like the WORST person (let alone mum) in the world.
I can not stand to be around my son at the moment, he is an absolute nightmare. He is 26 months, he literally never stops and I mean never stops, he smacks, punches, runs everywhere, screams, bangs toys on the floor, won't sit still for to minutes, won't have his nappy changed, won't brush his teeth. I could go on all day.
I honestly dread waking up in the morning to do the same old crap again. I've resorted to giving him his ipad just to shut him up.

I've got another baby on the way and am absolutely dreading doing it again. I feel so alone

You’re not a terrible mum, terrible mums don’t care that they feel this way .

Do you have any support from a partner or family member? You sound in desperate need of a break.

Is childcare/nursery an option for a few hours a week?

We had this with our first son. He used to hit us and kick off and I remember trying to wrestle him into his car seat and shouting (thank fuck he couldn't understand), " you've ruined my life!".

The thing to remember is to show him love. I was reactive (I'm not saying you are) and once I'd learned to calm down and wait for things to pass and let trivia go, I had a much better time with him.
What is good about him? My boy was a bugger in the day, but it used to tire him out and he'd sleep all night and give me a lie in to recharge. He was (and still is) funny. We used to laugh at daft things and I learned to let other things go so I could just deal with and engage with him.
Take some time out. A morning or an afternoon for yourself at the weekend if you have a partner or friend or relative to take over?
What killed me was not being able to concentrate on anything without "interruption". Kids do that by nature, but it is recognised that being engaged in something, creative flow, is very important for mental health.

When he's stopping, remember it will pass. Take a deep breath and step back mentally, ready to give him a hug when it's over (even when you don't feel like it). He will learn calmness and gentleness from your example.
Please keep talking, it's really hard, I know x

I know it all passes just feel so worried having a newborn on the way and the way his behaviour can be.
He is genuinely exhausting, when I take him to groups I see people looking in shock at how dull on he is, people even so "God you've got your hands full" or "your mad doing it again". It's giving me a real complex.

I am very reactive and I need to learn to control my temper before I can expect anything from him.
He is incredibly funny and confident, I love to watch how his little brain work trying to solve problems and it astonishes me everyday how creative he is about getting to stay up past bed time.

Sorry for my waffling, I'm just desperate to be a good mum and I'm so worried, hes going to hate me

Don't forget, he'll get ,ore verbal and so less frustrated. By they time school was looming on the horizon, my boy was my little, funny best friend and then school took him off me.
Honestly, he'll just get better as he gets older and he'll be busy with the new baby too!
When is your baby due, OP?
You'll be tired now as well. This is probably the most testing time for you.

We are all shit parents.
I discuss with my first DS what I wish I hadn't done when parenting him. I shouldn't, I know, but he's like, " mum, you were fine, I wouldn't want any other mum.".
We apologise to each other in our family. The parent isn't always right. We also let stuff like housework slide and have a cracking laugh.
Enjoy him and look after yourself.

I was gonna say maybe return to work but then see that you're pregnant..

www.howweelearn.com/quiet-time-activites-2-year-olds/

Which activities do you do with him? I found with my first that they were always a step ahead developmentally. It would take me a few months to catch up when they made a leap and there would be a period of frustration. Is he being stimulated enough? You could do some activities from the list with a reward if he completes a task.

Keep him off the ipad - too much sensory overload will be increasing these symptoms. They are utterly knackering at this age so many sympathies. Lots of positive attention from you plus as much fresh air and exercise as you can stand. Is he very sensory seeking or avoidant. Look up sensory processing and see if that rings any bells. The better his language gets, the better he will be. He is likely to be very frustrated. Best of luck but try and prethink everything so you are one step ahead of him and rechanel him where necessary.