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Original poster

How old before you left child in bath unsupervised?

218 replies

Gruffalosandbuffalos · 20/01/2020 17:35

Just that really. How old were your children before you felt you could leave them in the bath while you put clothes away in the next room?

OP posts:
whatsamum2do · 20/01/2020 22:41

About 4, she always bathed with her older sister who is 5 years older. My 6 year old I don't sit in the bathroom anymore but I am always nearby and checking.

Xmasbaby11 · 20/01/2020 22:47

7 here. I'd leave dd briefly to wander in and out. But the bath is very deep and dd is quite careless, young for her age as she has ASD. We have a big bathroom so I can sit near the bath and keep an eye on her.

Bringonspring · 20/01/2020 22:49

No way would I leave my 4 year old, he’d skip or something. Super surprised by some of these posts

thrree · 20/01/2020 22:50

My eldest is 5, for about a year I'v left her whilst I'v popped to get her towel or pyjamas. I know how dangerous water can be so there's no chance I'd ever leave a 1/2 year old.

sanityisamyth · 20/01/2020 22:50

About 3 but he'd been having swimming lessons since he was 6 weeks so he was aware of water. The baths were pretty shallow too. I was only ever next door in a tiny house as well.

sauvignonblancplz · 20/01/2020 22:54

I’m definitely on the over 5 part of this post, would never take risks with water .

Thelnebriati · 20/01/2020 22:55

I'm shocked how many people leave toddlers in the bath. When they go underwater they inhale because they don't know to hold their breath.

I actively taught my lot to hold their breath as soon as their face went underwater, by practicing regularly in the pool and at home; and I didn't leave them near water until they would do it as second nature.

Edel2019 · 20/01/2020 22:57

I am absolutely horrified to go through this thread and read that some people leave their kids alone in the bath at ages 2 and 3.

Please, do a quick google search and you will see that it is NOT safe.

A bath can take literally 10 minutes. Can't you spare that? Please, please do.

Edel2019 · 20/01/2020 22:58

It does NOT matter if the bath water is "shallow". I just can't believe what I'm reading. It's unbelievable.

BettyAll1 · 20/01/2020 23:01

I have a 4 year old and stay in the bathroom the whole time. No idea when I’ll stop doing that but it won’t be any time soon.

PanicAndRun · 20/01/2020 23:02

No reason to be horrified. While it's better to err on the side of caution(maybe not until 10 though) , decisions(how long you're out for,the reason you are out) will also be made depending on the child, layout and size of the house etc.

BettyAll1 · 20/01/2020 23:03

@Edel2019 I’m with you on this one! My mouth is wide open. I think there needs to be more education on how quickly children can get into difficulty in water.

Yubaba · 20/01/2020 23:04

About 4/5 ish. But I would always bath my 2 boys together so they weren’t alone completely. DS2 was 7 when he started asking for privacy and I stopped going in. I will shout through the door to check he’s not dissolved though, he likes a long soak!

TinyPop14 · 20/01/2020 23:07

About 3. I used to tidy up when Dd was in the bath. She would play with her toys and never stopped talking. We lived in a small flat so I could hear her no matter where I was.

Lipperfromchipper · 20/01/2020 23:10

I think it all depends on the children to be honest, mine are very chilled at bathtime, they know they are not allowed to stand up or get in or out by themselves (they are 4 and 6), I will pop in and out when they are bathing. They are more than capable of sitting up straight in a bath, and they both just play with a toy or chatter to each other. But to be honest our baths are mostly for a quick wash and quick play. Sometimes my 6 yr old will have a “relax” while I dry her DB.

To be honest even if I sat on my toilet whilst they had a bath I wouldn’t be able to see them...our bath is behind its own wall so you can’t see the rest of the bathroom, it looks out into the garden.

Magicpaintbrush · 20/01/2020 23:26

8

dogcrazy · 21/01/2020 00:07

About 4. The only good thing about our bathroom coming off the kitchen is it’s easy to hear and chat to DS while he’s in the bathroom. I do call him or go in if he’s quiet though. I’ve seen a child nearly drown in a pool and it’s silent.

GrumpyHoonMain · 21/01/2020 00:16

If your child slipped and fell unconscious then even the water from a shower could drown then.

FormerlyFrikadela01 · 21/01/2020 02:29

Mine is 3.5 and on the rare occasions he gets in the bath alone (still enjoys getting in with either me or his dad) I stay in the bathroom. Hes very very confident in water and has slipped and righted himself before but I dont like to take the risk. Besides he would have water all over the bathroom in no time if I left him.

BendingSpoons · 21/01/2020 07:32

People talk about children slipping and falling unconscious. I am still constantly monitoring my almost 4 year old even if I am not in the room. She literally does not stop talking and singing and if I hear a bang or it goes quiet I go back in. She goes to a swimming lesson and the teacher goes further away from her than I am. Not being in constant sight line does not mean I am not supervising. In fact I am probably paying more attention than MNing in the bathroom!

Of course there are horrible stories. My friend knows (through work) a child who was braindamaged eating apple and is horrified people give small children apple to eat. People won't agree on this or on many other risks.

McCanne · 21/01/2020 08:31

Is it not the case that most bath drownings of under 5s are due to parental neglect rather than parents making an assessment of their own child and continuing to be aware of them and what they’re doing? The average age here seems to be around 4, we can’t all be horrors. I’ve spent 4 years teaching my daughter water safety and what is ok and not ok to do in the bath and I’m happy to trust her. I wouldn’t leave her completely alone for the exact reason that she’s still a preschooler and not a robot following orders, but I feel like I can make a judgement about most things in her life quite competently.

BlingLoving · 21/01/2020 10:33

For all the horrified people on here, you have to put this in perspective. Toddlers drown in baths because they don't have the physical skills to balance in a slippery environment or the sense not to stand/leap etc. So I think most people who are leaving their children for a few minutes or whatever, are doing so with children who are not in this situation.

DD is strong and tall for her age. She's also extremely cautious by nature. But... she's not great at swimming or holding her breath and likes to lie on her stomach in the bath. So we didn't leave her for more than few second until she was probably four when we felt she was more capable of getting herself up if needed . DS on the other hand was much more physically competent in the water and was also strong and tall so I'm pretty sure he was allowed to sit by himself from an earlier age. He would have had no problem getting himself up AND would have instinctively held his breath. I can't remember exactly but Im' confident he was being left in the bath while I was in the next room from around 3.

Same child has been showering/bathing alone entirely - including running the water - since he was 7 I think. At first I'd help him with the taps and hair washing but even that he does all alone now.

Teaching children how to behave (ie not to mess around int he bath) and assessing their genuine physical capabilities is far more important than never leaving them to do anything independently.

But then, there are often threads on here from women who won't leave their children in a different room for even a few minutes while they go make a cup of tea (and I'm not talking tiny babies/destructive toddlers) so....

Juliette20 · 21/01/2020 10:39

I think generally 3 ish, but I wouldn't be away long at first, just 30 seconds to go and get something from upstairs. After about 7 they can be trusted on to get on with a bath, but I still pop my head in. Mainly to check progress as DD2 would only recently not be in it all night if she could (she's nearly 11 now).

When DD2 was 3, DD1 was 7, so generally then say, I'd wash DD2, DD1 would do herself, then I'd be around upstairs while they had a play with the door open.

crustycrab · 21/01/2020 10:42

Amazing how all those who think it's ok to leave toddlers alone in water justify it by saying they talk/sing/babble "constantly". Yeah right, and the 3 year old that knows to call his mum if the baby slips under the water Hmm. Let's hope he's not overly engrossed with the bubbles when he's meant to be doing the parents job.

Jesus fucking wept

Damntheman · 21/01/2020 10:42

I stay with my three year old as she likes the company, but I wouldn't think twice about what you do OP. My 6 year old I'm in and out helping him wash his (long) hair, but mostly just doing chores like putting laundry away and sorting the next load so not paying so much attention to him unless he wants to talk.