DS (13) receiving dodgy emails

[Lalallama]

One condition of him having a phone was that we know the pass code and can look at it to make sure he's staying safe online, which he's happy with. TBH we've not looked at it that much as it tends to just be WhatsApp conversations of total drivel.

But this morning a new email came up on his locked screen saying something along the lines of 'you've recieved a new flirt from fling.com' so I looked at his phone out of interest. He's set up a separate email account (he has one we've set up so he can email family, etc) and all the emails in there are from this fling/flirt site, and others, one called fuckbook.

He doesn't have access to a credit/ debit card so he can't have paid to subscribe to these, so I'm assuming these are free versions. The one email i opened had a photo of a woman/girl in her underwear.

He's not showed any interest in girls so far, in fact he seems a bit young for his age compared to some of his peers. So I was quite shocked to see these emails.

DP thinks we should just ignore it, but I feel uncomfortable about it. Am I being naive? Is this what teenage boys do??

Could it be spam? I signed up to register an account so I could watch free movies. And ever since I have been sent those sort of rude spam emails back.

I don't think it is spam, it's a gmail account and that it normally very good at filtering spam into the junk folder. It looked a bit too specific to be spam iyswim.

ask him about it, safe guarding your child online is important.

I get so many emails about viagra, penis surgery, hot Asian babes, hot local babes, hot Russian babes, banking errors in my favour /not in my favour (contact us nownownow!) that you'd think I'd been up to some massively dodgy stuff. (Am straight female, BTW.) I'd signed up to a couple of online things a few years ago, & within a couple of days, it was clear, my email address had been sold /shared & I was receiving vast amounts of spam. Literally hundreds of emails every day. It took me about a year of diligently "unsubscribing" several times from each thing, sorting the spam filter out, etc, I still get a couple of dozen spam each day though.

If you're concerned, sort out his settings so he can't view unsuitable material. He could still try, but it will be more difficult.

Even if it were spam, he's set up this email account for a reason. OP can you access his accounts on these sites?

We have an email address which we all use for signing up to websites and so on, all the spam then goes there and our real email addresses are for family and friends only, that stops any of us seeing the inordinate amounts of spam sent out.

If he's set up a separate email account, it's totally and entirely intentional. Have that serious conversation.

He has set a new account up? Csn you contact the site in question and tell them his real age get them to block him permanently?

Thanks all. I'm definitely going to talk to him about it, I'm just unsure of the best approach.

I'm going to have another look at his phone later and have a proper look at the sites he's getting the emails from.

Assuming he's not registered directly, is suspect he's given his email to a competition or free gaming download sort of site which has sold on his details to porn companies.

I would say "I noticed that you are getting some emails from dodgy sites" and see what he has to say. Can you tell from his history or messages from friends if they are talking about porn sort of subjects?

Tsk to him about scams - Id imagine he's seen stuff enter your email for free V-bucks! Enter your email to see C take off her clothes!

You don’t get spam without giving your email out. Not necessarily to the company that’s spamming you of course.

I would encourage him to set up a third email address (and close this one if possible) purely for competitions and the like. There’s also a way of tracking who’s sold your email address which you can find by googling as I can’t remember it.

Thanks all. I've had a chat with him. I also had another look at a couple of the sites he's getting emails from, it doesn't look as though you can sign up for them without paying so he couldn't have done that. Also some of the emails are about religious bible stuff and he definitely wouldn't have signed up to that!

I said we had a chat, he said he sees the emails but just swipes across to delete them. This seems to be true as the majority are unread. He'd set up a second email address to subscribe to a game so he could play two separate characters apparently. He said the game looked legit as there is a big online community (brawlstars?). But then he did admit to using that email address to try out other games, which might be where all the spam is coming from. I've told him that he needs to check with us before he enters his email address so we know it's an ok site and won't spam him or give viruses or whatever.

So hopefully I'd been worrying about nothing, he isn't signing up to adult dating sites (it would have properly shocked me if he had, he really isn't interested in anything like that, him and his friends just talk about gaming and YouTube pranks!).

**I get so many emails about viagra, penis surgery, hot Asian babes, hot local babes, hot Russian babes, banking errors in my favour /not in my favour (contact us nownownow!) that you'd think I'd been up to some massively dodgy stuff”

Yep I get those same emails too. Makes you think twice about giving your email address!