Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Just existing - infertility and miscarriage related (maybe triggering)

2 replies

VenusStarr · 17/01/2020 08:31

I'm posting here as I'm really struggling and trying to avoid the conception board at the moment.

I've been ttc over 2 years now. At first it seemed we couldn't concieve but after 16 months I got my first bfp that sadly ended in miscarriage at 9 weeks (early scans showed the baby stopped developing around 5.5 weeks). I had already started infertilty testing and was seen by a fertility consultant and had the hsg test. Two months later I was pregnant again and lightening struck twice - baby stopped growing about 5.5 weeks, miscarried just before 9 weeks in September.

We stopped ttc whilst I was waiting for a hysteroscopy - had this in December and a polyp was removed so we've resumed ttc. That 3 month wait, I honestly felt like life stopped. I had quite severe anxiety whilst waiting for the operation.

Recurrent miscarriage testing suggests all is fine with my blood (I'm 36). Our fertility consultant has diagnosed unexplained infertilty and is referring us for ivf.

I'm struggling so much, I have got symptoms of ptsd and am having therapy with a psychotherapist via my work. But I am struggling to live my life, I am just existing. I'm finding everything is triggering for me - people and places I found comfort are now triggering me, trying to feel hope is triggering.

The only thing that helps is doing a jigsaw - I can switch off and concentrate on that. My friendships have suffered, my relationship is good and he is supportive but this is putting pressure on us.

How can I try to live again? I really feel like I'm at rock bottom. I can't remember what I used to be like and what I enjoyed doing. Life is just consumed with this.

OP posts:
angelmum6 · 17/01/2020 08:46

I know completely how you feel.

We've been TTC for nearly 6 years, 8 miscarriages, pregnant again but heartbeat is slow and expecting the worst.

Nobody tells you about the absolute SHIT side of conceiving. When we got married, I naively thought, stop the pill, have 3 babies and a wonderful family life, our reality is very different.

I also suffer anxiety and depression, my Dr also thinks PTSD from all of the losses. In 6 years I've lost my Nan and Grandad (in their 60s and they raised me so like my parents to me) and all of the babies and I'm struggling to cope.

I can only advise you to be kind to yourself and your relationship, spend time together, book a holiday or anything that you can look forward to together.

Sending love xx

VenusStarr · 17/01/2020 11:22

Thank you for replying @angelmum6 I'm so sorry to hear your experience ❤️ it's absolutely heartbreaking. I'm sending lots of love back to you xx

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page