Poo potty training struggles 3 year old girl nearly turning 4!

[KKM321]

I have a 3 year old who is turning 4 this coming March .. and also starting school
in September! I’m really struggling with the poo side of potty training to the point where it is effecting her life at nursery, home and her emotions. Im turning into a nervous wreck for her and I can’t help but just worry as every solution I had for her potty training just has gone down the pan.

She is currently in pre school at nursery and it’s coming to the point where managers of the nursery have mentioned that she is too intelligent to not being able to do this side of potty training and it’s not right for her to be doing poo in a pull up at this age!

She is fully potty trained with her wee’s and has been for over a year it’s just the poo’s I am struggling with significantly..

Currently she does a poo in a pull up sat on the toilet - My husband tricked her a couple of weeks ago and cut her nappy in half and she actually did a poo in the toilet - We was ecstatic and showered her with gifts and really praised her .. it carried on a couple of times and now she has decided that she can’t do it like that any more and checks the nappy over before we put it on her now otherwise if it is cut she won’t poo at all. I have read potty books to her let her use YouTube on my phone whilst trying to poo but she does nothing but get so upset..

I have sat with her one to one hours on end and tried to ask her what the actual emotional attachment is with the nappy and she will just burst into tears ..

All advice is welcome I just really need some help or advice from anyone who has been in this situation..

Thanks guys!

Ds was a lot like this, only pooed in a pull up overnight. He was 4.5 when he got it. We tried Poo goes to Pooland, books, bribery, reward charts, nothing worked.
Honestly, the only thing that worked was backing right off. We just did 10 minutes "toilet time" with no mention of trying to do a poo every night at bedtime, when we chatted, watched videos on my phone etc and then he just got off the toilet at the end and we didn't mention not having done a poo. Part of it with ds was he was scared about falling down the toilet so we used a child seat on the loo and also got his potty back.out again and put it in his room, he then tried to do a poo on his own and ending up doing it in the potty then progressed to toilet after a few weeks. I thought he would be way too big for the potty but it worked for him!
Have a chat with the nursery manager about backing off too, it really has nothing to do with intelligence.

Mine did this too. She got there when she was ready. I almost lost my mind over it, but nothing helped.

Relax, wait it out, tell the nursery manager that if she's so uninformed about young children she's in the wrong job. It has nothing at all to do with intelligence.

We bought the book 'Everybody poos' for DD and it made a huge difference.

We also read her all of the Dinosaur that Pooed books to make her laugh about it all.

We also reassured her lots - "Mummy loves your poo, I love to see it in the toilet!"

I honestly thought she would never do it but then she did and hasn't looked back. It was a slog but we got there eventually.

My 3 old was the same with poos until I got her favourite book and sat her on the toilet and read it to her. As she was so engrossed looking at the book she did the poo. Gross I know but it worked