When do you think my daughter will "sleep through" the night?

[1234sleepsomemore]

She's 21 months old now and wakes every 2-3 hours, although quite often much more. She has a quick breastfeed and then goes straight back to sleep normally so it's not as bad as it sounds, but I'm concerned that when she's unwell or troubled by something and waking much more, needing to nurse to get back to sleep is hindering her. I'm going to gradually night wean as soon as we get a good stretch where she doesn't seem ill, but I honestly don't think it will help as I suspect I'll be in the same position but without a tool to help. You can't just cuddle her in the night - she goes ballistic! And if DH tries she acts as if she's being abducted. Is it worth buying the "no cry sleep solution" or will it suggest these sorts of things, because she absolutely will cry (scream house down!)

I'm curious as to when everyone thinks she'll sleep through based on your experience of frequent waking toddlers at this age. 3, 4?

I'm ok with it as long as it's ok for her (I think she gets the right amount of sleep overall) but if we try for another I wonder if I can manage with both!

I have no advice OP but my 17month old is exactly the same! I feel your pain :(

With both of mine it happened at around 3, iirc.

My son would wake that frequently at that age. Still usually wakes once a night at 5 years old

Yeah, my 5yo still doesn't sleep thru. Up 5 times last night. 😴

I had a 'talk' with my DD when she was a month off 2 (so, 23 months) explaining that now she's in a big girl bed she needs onsleep all night because if she wakes up in the night mummy will get a tummy ache and a headache so if you wake up find comforter and dummy and go back to sleep. Then battled through 2 nights of self-settling at bedtime (outside door listening to crying for 30 seconds, back in to reassure and kiss, repeat for 45 mins) and she got the message. She's old enough to understand now if you explain it to her. Good luck

My 6 year old still wakes once a night maybe 5 out of 7 nights he was an awful sleeper up every couple of hours so this is a huge improvement . I also have a 22 month old who does sleep through most nights but is an early riser tends to wake at 5.30ish for the day.

DS1 slept through from 6 months (7pm until about 7am) but that was pure luck and I was so thankful. DS2 well....hopefully one day? It varies so much, but fingers crossed it is soon for you.

@WineIsMyCarb how were you settling her in the night before you had a chat with her? I was thinking we'd talk about it in a few months but we have been reading a book about night weaning!

16 month old GD is the same, last night it was four times. Mum is thinking of a sleep consultant.

By the time she was 18 months plus it was Sleepwalk into her room, say shush, lie there for a bit, leave when I think she's gone back. Repeat 20 mins later just as I'm starting to drift back off in my own bed.
Forgot to say that 2 weeks previous DH moved onto the sofa bed in room next to her so he would hear her first and go to her. Daddy had less appeal at 2am (Although is often a daytime favourite, so she must just like torturing me!). I think also I wake at her slightest grumble, whereas she had to cry/shout for him so that meant a couple of nights she 'slept through' (slightly woke then resettled herself).

Would you consider stopping the milk in the night? She must be capable of steak and chips at teatime... surely isn't hungry in the night?!

Night weaning was the game-changer for both of mine, I’m afraid.

DC1 fed back to sleep hourly until I night weaned him at 2y3m - he didn’t then miraculously sleep through but he started doing 2-4 hour chunks and properly sleeping through by 2y9m. He’s now 7 and other than the odd accident or nightmare hasn’t woken since.

DC2 is the same age as your DD and her sleep has been more varied - great as a newborn, went to shit a bit at 4 months and never hugely recovered - the odd spurt of longer stretches but often up every hour since then. Had a first effort at night weaning her around 11/12 months, she was too unhappy, it didn’t work and I quickly gave up. Then I went back to work so kept feeding at night for a bit even though I was breaking, because it seemed too unfair on her otherwise. Finally went for it a couple of months ago now (so 19 ish months?) and it made a big difference. She tends to still wake once at 2am ish and mostly needs a cuddle (sometimes just a bit of sshhing), and wakes up too early for the day (I think because she’s hungry), but it’s a huge improvement and I feel less wrecked for not feeding through the night even though I am still up with her, and she was cross at first but settled very quickly rather than escalating her wailing in distress. She was already going (back) to sleep off the breast for months before that which helped - she breastfed at bedtime but went into bed/cot awake, and the same thing in the night. With DC1 we had to make both those changes at once as he was much more strongly attached to feeding properly to sleep.

I’m a big fan of breastfeeding through the night but I wasn’t able to cope with doing it for as long as either child wanted to. I absolutely trust they would both have slept through in the end either way, and I don’t regret doing it for as long as I did, but I also don’t regret changing things when it wasn’t working for me any more.

Good luck!

Both my DD's slept through as soon as I night weaned at about 22/24 months.

Google the Jay Gordon method. It's very gentle.

My DD started sleeping through consistently as soon as I stopped BF her at 16 months. Before that she woke up to 3 times a night.

It was one of the reason I stopped, I mean it may not have been down to that, may have been a coincidence? She sleeps through I'd say 95% of the time now (nearly 3)

Night weaning isn’t always the answer - see above 5/6/7 year olds still waking (unless still breastfeeding, which would be quite unusual at that age though obviously still possible).