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Original poster

Would you let your 10ds walk home at night?

58 replies

Foxton20 · 05/01/2020 10:13

Ds goes cubs and is due to start scouts this term. Dh normally takes him and collects him as it finishes at 8.15 and he leaves for work when he’s on nights at 8.30.

Dh works shifts some two Monday’s a month he won’t be able to pick him up.

It’s 0.8m and takes 15 mins. He has a mobile phone and it’s a straight road past shops.

I don’t know what to do 😩

OP posts:
shinynewapple2020 · 05/01/2020 10:31

I understand that his BF isn't moving up to scouts yet but are there not other boys he is friendly with whose parents could give him a lift back? Perhaps your DH could offer to drop their DC back the two weeks he can do as a swap for them bringing your DS when DH is working.

Alternatively call a taxi, take your toddler with you, collect DS and bring him back, shouldn't cost too much if journey less than a mile. Just wrap your little girl up in a blanket and carry her. I don't think I'd leave a 3 year old with a 12 year old either, although would leave 12 year old.

Cillmantain · 05/01/2020 10:32

Collect him
But at the premises where the meeting is.
Not halfway.
He is far too young to be unaccompanied even for a short distance.

MindYours · 05/01/2020 10:34

Give your 12 year old instructions to phone his Dad in half an hour if you're not back just incase (granted very unlikely) something happens to prevent you from coming straight home.

Original poster
Foxton20 · 05/01/2020 10:34

I thought it would be ok as he walks to and from school every day which is the same distance 😩

OP posts:
ExpletiveDelighted · 05/01/2020 10:34

Hopefully once he starts you will get to know some other parents who you can share with. I found that once mine moved up to Scouts there were more evenings away from the hut and so needing lifts etc, I got into a Whatsapp group with some of the other parents for liftshares.

zoobincan · 05/01/2020 10:36

I thought it would be ok as he walks to and from school every day which is the same distance 😩

Well there is a huge difference between 3:30/4pm with lots of people and other school kids around and 8:15/8:30 at night.

I don't see why it's a huge problem though. Small child sleeping, 12 year old in house. Fine to walk and collect.

gamerwidow · 05/01/2020 10:36

12 year old will be fine with sleeping toddler. Make sure you have your phone and he can contact you if he is worried. You’ll only be gone 30 minutes at most.
Agree with the others that you need to collect him from the premises. I would be very surprised if the group leaders would even allow him to leave without an adult at that time of night in the dark.

Notthisnotthat · 05/01/2020 10:37

Might be worth asking the leaders of someone can drop him off if you can offer to take other children home on the weeks when DH isn't working.

Lllot5 · 05/01/2020 10:37

Walking to school is different I think. One because it’s during the day and two presumably mothers are going in the same direction and the same time.
If your three year old will be asleep by the time you have to leave I think it’s ok to leave them with your twelve year old.
Hopefully you’ll find someone to lift share with.

CountFosco · 05/01/2020 10:37

Ask the scoutleader about lifts, if it's not far there will be someone who is prepared to do it.

SkySmiler · 05/01/2020 10:38

Absolutely not

gamerwidow · 05/01/2020 10:38

thought it would be ok as he walks to and from school every day which is the same distance
DDs school lets children walk home from school if they leave at the end at school but not if they attend after school clubs in the winter because it’s too dark.

ExpletiveDelighted · 05/01/2020 10:40

Yes to speaking to the Scout leaders, they won't want anyone to miss out for want of a lift somewhere, for the nights off site ours are very good at helping sort liftshares, so don't worry about it.

zoobincan · 05/01/2020 10:42

Yes to speaking to the Scout leaders, they won't want anyone to miss out for want of a lift

If I was the parent who got asked to take someone else's kid home regularly and found out they were perfectly capable of doing it themselves I would be really annoyed.

OP has literally no reason not to collect her own child.

user32564567 · 05/01/2020 10:45

I wouldn't be annoyed and if I was walking that way I'd happily walk him home or drop him off.

ExpletiveDelighted · 05/01/2020 10:45

I was talking about nights offsite, not meetings at the hut.

zoobincan · 05/01/2020 10:46

Sorry for some reason I managed to miss all of that Blush

zoobincan · 05/01/2020 10:47

wouldn't be annoyed and if I was walking that way I'd happily walk him home or drop him off.

Oh, I would happily give any child a lift. I would be annoyed if I was approached and asked to do it because the parent can't, when actually the parent can, that all.

isitpossibleto · 05/01/2020 10:53

I would happily help with a lift home. As far as I can see here, parent can’t - it’s past the toddlers bed time. I wouldn’t let the 12 year old stay with sleeping toddler either - my LA SS would see that as a huge safeguarding concern.

zoobincan · 05/01/2020 10:55

I wouldn’t let the 12 year old stay with sleeping toddler either - my LA SS would see that as a huge safeguarding concern.

Would they? Would they really? I don't think so. 12 year olds look after siblings when they are awake sometimes without issue. It's hardly a concern for half an hour in the evening twice a month!

fedup21 · 05/01/2020 10:57

my LA SS would see that as a huge safeguarding concern.

I find that wet difficult to believe!

fedup21 · 05/01/2020 10:57

Very difficult

MsMellivora · 05/01/2020 11:04

This is military cadets but DS who is 18 gives three other cadets lifts to and from their meetings. It only puts him out by about two minutes though. There is no way I would let a child walk around at night it’s totally different to in the day.

rookiemere · 05/01/2020 11:05

The option of leaving the 12 yr old to keep an eye on the baby works well. 10 yr old might be ok to walk home when it's still light in the evenings with his friend once he has moved up, but for now walking to pick him up is the right option - or cycling if that's a possibility.

Original poster
Foxton20 · 05/01/2020 11:12

Perfect, I’m going to pick him up. It’s only twice a month. I’m sure both dds will be fine.

OP posts:
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