Help with sleep routine.

[passthebucky]

DD's are 3&5 atm they share a double bed and I have to lay with them every night until they fall asleep which is driving me to insanity. Dd3 goes to bed at 6:45 and sometimes I can be laying with her anything between 20-90 mins until she's asleep which then it's her sisters time and the same goes for her. Sometimes they'll just go to sleep but on average it can take 45 mins each. I'm a single mother and I just want to relax and catch up with housework before I fall into bed myself. They were fine sharing no problems but for some reason one is waking each night and I just end up putting them into my bed so I don't have to deal with the crying and getting them back to sleep in their own bed with the risk of the other one waking. Well I've had enough, I want some me time in the evenings and time to catch up with my teen DD's, so I've ordered a bunk bed and it'll be here next week. Dd5 has already showed that she doesn't want this bunk bed because mummy won't be able to lay next to her I've just ordered a night light and a bedtime star chart for them both but I don't know how to actually tackle this, there's going to be tears and tantrums about me staying with them until their asleep but I just want to read to them and leave and for them to just stop waking in the night any advice/help would be much appreciated.

Would they lie and listen to an audiobook or CBeebies radio?

I did consider audio books. What's the best way to listen to them? Should I get an Alexa?

This sounds tough. I had during the night problems with Dd but some of the things I did might transfer. We got her a cd player for audio books, and actually what she likes best to get to sleep is xylophone versions of Foo fighters songs! If you need to go down a reward / incentive route then bedtime tokens could help, which you might be able to find out about online. Have a family meeting and get your kids to set some rules about going to sleep, the kids write them down and keep the rule book which you can re-read every night. Then make some bedtime tokens with the kids. Make loads. The idea is they have as many as they need at first. Every time they get out of bed or call you that's absolutely fine, but it costs them a token. It's vital they have more than they will use at first. If they have any tokens left in the morning, they get a reward. Let them choose what that might be. It should be something instant. My Dd chose penny sweets and spent 33 tokens the first night just for an idea. What you do is really gradually you reduce the number of tokens, until they have to actively try to stay in bed and get to sleep. Eventually you'll get down to 2 that cover an emergency wee or an extra cuddle, that's it. Then it'll gradually get forgotten. This method was suggested to me by a sleep consultant to help my 4yo who was awake for 2hrs every night from 1:30am on the dot for over a year. And it definitely helped. I read up on it in scientific journals.

The Moshi Twilight app is a good alternative to a CD player, there are some free stories you can try to see if it helps.

You can use Alexa or any tablet or smartphone. Our local library has an app that you can "borrow" audiobooks on so worth checking if yours does too. I wouldn't buy something especially in case it doesn't work.

Thanks everyone I'm going to try some of these suggestions, her nana bought her the amazon fire 7 tablet so she can listen to audio books, fingers crossed.