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What do I do now?

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MontanaSwing · 27/12/2019 21:42

I was a software developer earning a good salary when I went on maternity leave to have my son. When I went back after a year, I had terrible anxiety and missed my son so I gave it up and my DH now supports us.

I work part time for myself at home in my own business.

The thing is, I am just so damn bored being a sahm and working for myself 2 days a week at home. I miss having a life of my own. I miss my independence. I have thought about going back to work but then I don’t think I’d want to leave my son again, I don’t want to miss out on these years whilst he’s little (he’s 2 next month). At the same time, the longer I leave it to find a job, the less likely I’ll get one because I won’t have any recent experience. I have been looking for part time jobs, but there are none in my industry.

I don’t know what to do for the best. I don’t want to leave it too long and regret it but then I don’t want to get a job organise a nursery etc and then want to pack it in again. Everyone is so young in my industry and I just feel older and older.

I feel like my career defined me l, I love using my brain, and now I don’t know who I am or what I’m for any more.

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