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Original poster

looking someone up on facebook question.

35 replies

kimlo · 26/12/2019 08:13

Someone has an unusual last name, isn't from the same area as you and has no mutual friends as you.

If you look them up and when you have put on their first name (and all the suggestions then where the people you are friends with on facebook with the same name at that point) and the first letter of their second name in and their name is the first suggestion does that mean they have looked you up?

OP posts:

veeboo · 26/12/2019 09:39

It's what the Wildrumpypumpus said. You are connected through him even if he is blocked. It won't know if she has searched for you.

MyOtherProfile · 26/12/2019 09:40

You have a connection on FB via your ex even if it’s that you have him blocked

This. So it's not surprising she came up. Do you still have mutual friends with your ex? If so that would add to reasons why she cropped up.

Original poster

kimlo · 26/12/2019 09:43

the whole situation is a nightmare, and it's been going on for months.

No I don't get her either, I would be running as fast as I could. Especially considering they have only been together about a month, before that he had been with his ex for about 8 years, and even she hasn't put up with the situation. Thats why she worries me. But when I said that to the police they said she was very supportive and no risk to me, then she came with him when he turned up at my house.

OP posts:

Original poster

kimlo · 26/12/2019 09:44

I have mutual friends with him (his family only) but not her.

OP posts:

gamerwidow · 26/12/2019 10:08

To be fair she would have fallen for him in spite of what he did for the same reason you fell for him. I suspect he is charming, is love bombing her and good at spinning a yarn about how actually you are the one who is obsessed with him.
You know from personal experience the mask he puts up until it’s too late. I wouldn’t be so quick to blame his next victim.

happycamper11 · 26/12/2019 10:24

You don't need to have mutual friends but she could be mutual friend of a mutual friend of a mutual friend which would narrow her above Susan D in another country or continent. She is also linked to you as exp is linked to you via fb due to you having him in a block list

Original poster

kimlo · 26/12/2019 10:30

Is he charming? No, but very good at playing the mild mannered victim. I never fell for him. It was a brief fling that resulted in dd2 over 10 years ago. I have also called him out on every dick move he has ever pulled. He can't control me no matter what he tries thats part of the reason he's obsessed I think.

OP posts:

gamerwidow · 26/12/2019 11:07

He can't control me no matter what he tries thats part of the reason he's obsessed I think.
Yes you are probably right. You shouldnt be allowing this headspace at Christmas though. He has muscled in on your celebrations without even trying. Let it go, you’ll never know why the name popped up conclusively. Why give this your time? It’s not worth it.

MyMajesty · 26/12/2019 11:19

You're probably right that the gf will see the reality now and will back off from supporting his harassment.

Looneytune253 · 26/12/2019 12:18

If she turned up at your house then the phones may have been close enough on location services to tell fb that you have met. That will make it likely that you would friend request each other (obv not likely in this case). I used to get friend suggestions for a (horrible) doctor in my surgery when I had been. I don't think he was stalking me at all.

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