How does your 2 year old get to sleep? Bored of the long sleep sessions.

[IndecentFeminist]

Just staggered down from another mammoth session of getting the toddler to sleep.

How do you put yours down at night? Do they go down awake and stay in bed?

Routine, based on what will settle your individual child.

My dd always goes to sleep best around 9pm, it started from when I was pregnant and she's now nearly 3. Her bedtime routine is:

6.30 dinner
7.30 bath and teeth
8 bed for stories and cuddles
9 lights out

If she's not asleep at lights out, we'll sing to her/cuddle her until she is asleep. She's been in her own toddler size bed since she was 2.

DD2 is almost three, and my third DC.

DC1 - we got into the routine of him going to sleep by himself by the age of two-ish. Just talked to him one night how it was time to do it this way, and mummy and daddy we’re just downstairs. I guess it was a sort of gradual retreat because we always came straight back up if he called for us, only he soon stopped calling for us so much.

DD1 - just before she turned two, and when I was heavily pregnant with DC3, we decided it was time to do the same. I withstood three hellish nights of rapid return with a screaming almost-two year old until she gave in.

Dd2 - just cannot imagine being able to do that now! A combination of me working in the evenings at home ( but needing to meet deadlines) and two other children to ensure getting to bed means I just take the path of least resistance and feed her to sleep. I really need to nip it in the bud whilst I’m off work over Christmas but I’m just too knackered.

Should add that DH has always worked evenings so bedtimes have always been solo.

Mine fucks about until she falls asleep about 30-40 mins so we put her down at 6.30. HOPING!! She’ll be asleep by 7.

Sometimes go in and say THATS IT NOW! Sleep please!! X

DS is nearly 2 and goes down awake and falls asleep by himself but I did sleep train. In contrast to DD who took forever to fall asleep and needed lots of help (bottles, repeated cuddles, sitting and holding her hand, co-sleeping etc. etc.) for years, which is why I sleep trained DS.

I think a cot may be the key 🤔

So the routine thing....

I have 22mo twins. We have done a strict routine since they left nicu.

GirlTwin goes into bed, lies down, and goes to sleep.

BoyTwin fucks about, throws his stuffed toy out, cries, shouts etc etc and requires rocking to sleep.

Same routine, two toddlers, totally different results.

Don't get me wrong, I love routine, but it won't necessarily cure a bad settler or a bad sleeper.

Mine were both climbing out of the cot by 18 months. I think a lot of it is personality of the kid.

My 5 year old has always (after early baby days so 6+ months) slept easily and on his own. I just put him down with toys/ books and he would drift off. Still does, usually while I'm fighting with the 2.5 year old.

The 2.5 year old has always been harder work. I BF her at night, sometimes to sleep sometimes not. She can't self settle and relax herself and always needs help. I'm cutting her nap out over this break as I think thats causing part of the problem. No nap and she's asleep by 8pm, 1 hour and it's 10pm and if daycare let her sleep for 2 ish hours it's easily midnight and she's still awake.

DS1 at that age still co-sleeping, would feed him to sleep, sometimes had to pretend to be asleep myself, then sneak away and leave him. He wasn't a very active sleeper so was always safe. It used to take ages though. I think I'd moved him into his own single bed, might have been a few months later. He used to be a nightmare to get to sleep but once asleep he would be like the dead.

DS2 is 16 months (so not close to 2, at all) and has his own room and a cot but still has to be fed to sleep every night. I don't mind this as such - it takes about 10 mins, sometimes 20, occasionally if he's very hyped up he does a few laps of his bedroom, and then he cuddles in and feeds and goes to sleep. But he is quite opposite to DS1 in that while he goes down easily he doesn't stay down. He's got a bit better recently in reverting to 4 hour stretches (from 1-2) but he's slept 5 hours a handful of times since he was born, and never ever longer. So I am thinking about night weaning him in the hope he will sleep better, but I'm in two minds really, because currently if he wakes up in the middle of the night wide awake and chatty, there is actually a 70% chance boob plus us pretending to be asleep will (eventually) convince him to sleep again. And if we lose that, one of us has to get up and supervise him. Also I can't get my head around how you actually get such a young child to understand that they are supposed to be lying down and relaxing to sleep, which makes me feel that leaving him to cry (even if we are right there) is cruel because he doesn't actually understand what we want him to do instead.

Bath, milk while I dress him for bed, then a story (sometimes 4 of 5 stories) I then sing the bedtime song from "chip and potato" and hes either straight to sleep or we have a chat about the day.

For me - my two year old has always needed to he fed or rocked to sleep. He is JUST (at 2 years 9 months) starting to be able to just close his eyes and go to sleep if he has had no nap and is super tired but not hysterically overtired. Most nights he wants to bf to sleep.

At nursery - apparently he just yawns and goes to sleep at nap time.

His childminder tried to sleep train him (without consent). It didn't work. I haven't tried it because I suspected it wouldn't work in his case (pretty high needs).

Breastfeeding and Co sleeping.

I think a cot may be the key

A cot makes things easier but I doubt you'll be able to get him into one now. You could do the disappearing chair sleep training technique to ease away from cuddling to sleep - start with sitting next to the bed holding his hand and then just sitting next to the bed, and then move progressively further away until you are no longer in the room. Will take quite a while but will be less stressful than full on sleep training at this age.

Yeah true. The others (this is child #3) were very different. #1 just cracked falling asleep on her own at about 18 months, #2 was about 2. This one is just a different kettle of fish, he's very attached to me.

I think I'll suck it up for now, and slowly focus on night weaning and take it from there. 💤🛌

I have a 2 1/2 year old and it has been really variable. She is a sooky wee thing so prefers to fall asleep cuddled on my knee. She is huge though and it is obviously enormously uncomfortable for us both. Some nights it was taking us an age as well.

We tried moshi stories downloaded onto a old iPad and they are an absolute wonder. Most nights she is out within the first few minutes of a story but even if she isn’t having the story on has helped her feel happier being put into the cot and left to settle herself.

For what it’s worth we also do no naps at all and do three book stories together sitting in her room in her bag before the moshi stories go on

Good luck, hope sleep clicks for him soon

Mine moved into the bottom bunk at 2, the 1st night he kept DD then 6 up until 10, after that he settled fine. Teeth, bath, nappy, pyjamas, story, sleep.