8 year old no longer believes in Santa

[isabellerossignol]

I see many threads each year where people are upset that a child has worked out that there is no Santa. But my 8 year old worked it out and I feel differently.

It's like a whole level of stress has been removed from Christmas. No hiding things at relatives houses, we can just say 'stay out of that cupboard, the Christmas presents are in there'. No trying to explain why he got four times as much as one friend got, but only a quarter of what another friend got. No having to hide different rolls of wrapping paper so that Santa doesn't accidentally use the same paper as mum and dad.

I know a lot of people feel sad at the thought of their children growing out of things, but honestly for every negative there is a corresponding positive.

Agreed. I don't feel sad about my DC growing up in general. Tbh parenting, to me, has got easier and more enjoyable as they've got older. I'm much better at talking through issues with them than I am emdlessly chasing toddlers around.

I never went to those extremes - always thought my kids would wonder why it was always the same wrapping paper! My son figured out that either Ssnta shopped at Tesco or mummy was Santa. Can't remember how my daughter got it but think another child may have told her (possibly her brither). But usually kids have figured it out but try really hard to believe for an extra year or two because they like the magic too.
Mine are teens and still insist no presents under the tree before Christmas morning!

My 7yo is highly suspicious this year. He’s a very logical kid and I don’t like outright lying to him so I’ve just been saying ‘what do you think?’ in reply to his questions. I thought I’d be sad as I’d hoped for a few more years of him believing but he’ll still love his presents and be just as happy.

My DS is 6. I don't make Santa a big deal in our house, DS believes in him but he knows that the presents come from family and friends and I've bought stuff for other family in the shops in front of him. I don't try and make everything "secretive". I think he's just a fun character for DS.

We kept Santa low key and they always knew who the presents were actually from , one so that they were not disappointed when they work it out and two I wasn’t comfortable lying to them.

Mine doesn't believe either. I thought I would have got one more Christmas out of him believing. That said I didn't believe at 8 either and was questioning it for a while before then.

I'd think most 9 yos would have figured it out. I've got a friend who claims in one breath that her 8 year old still believed and in the next he's been raking around the house and found some gifts!

My 9 year old dd believes 100%, I guess this might be the last year though. Older dd was 10 when she sussed it.

My DD, 10, has sussed it this year. I have also have a 3 year old though so have to keep it hoo for a while! I’m a bit sad but I knew I’d be pushing my luck this year as last year she made little comments, and yes the same wrapping paper was one !

My 7 year old no longer believes, I don’t care tbh as I never made a point of doing santa as I’m a single mum so they always seen me buying everything anyway but they came out of school believing in it one day so I just went with it. But this year I think one of his school friends have said it’s not true as he has now suddenly stopped believing which is fine by me.

My almost 9 year old has never really believed despite huge effort on my part to engender the 'wow' factor
His reply has always been yes right mum!
He's always been really black and white and incredibly self aware

My ds is 8 and asking lots of questions this year think this will be his last year of believing and tbh I'm not that bothered

We didn't go hugely over the top with ours, no snowy footprints by the fireplace or anything like that. The different wrapping paper was probably the biggest thing we did to try to preserve the myth.

I've known people in real life, and read threads here, where people get quite irate with children who question it, and threaten there will be no presents for anyone who doesn't believe and I always think that's quite sad.

But it's like so many things in parenthood. Yes, I miss when my pair were toddlers who adored me unconditionally, but the positives to them being more grown up far outweigh the lovely bits of parenting a toddler. We stood in a long queue last week with lots of tantrumming toddlers and their stressed out parents and the relief was huge that we were no longer at that stage. Swings and roundabouts. You lose some things and gain others.

I wish my 9 year old would suss it! I can’t be bothered to keep up the pretence. The different wrapping paper, making sure both kids have exactly the same amount from Santa. Then they have separate presents from us.

‘Will Santa wake up the dog?’ Etc.

I think it’s nice when they are 3/4/5/6 as they are too young to question things. Now it’s just a pain. I’m sure he’s suspicious but I guess if he says he outright doesn’t believe then he’s worried he won’t get any presents.

DS is 9 and definitely firmly believes. I also have DD 25 and DD 17 and because of my 8 year age gaps I've now been doing Father Christmas presents for a lot of years. I'm sure if he didn't believe it then I wouldn't be buying a 25 year old a big bag of Santa presents that consist and clothes, perfume and makeup rather than the tradional (and somewhat cheaper) stocking fillers! Both my girls didn't suss until year 6 (and I think it was somewhat prompted by me being less secretive) so I think I have a few years left!

Mine suss it out in the summer then become
Believers again by November 😂

DS1 (9) said something cynical quite randomly partway through the year. I was cracking at that age and wanting to believe more than real believing. We've got DS2 (6) who is quite fantastical, so the show goes on. He's the one who's been smart-arsed about spotting buttons for the animatronics at santa's grotto, or the elastic holding up the beard on a man dressed up . It's a good job we didn't do the school grotto, as he'd probably have outed our next-door-neighbour 😂 His classmates were well impressed that ge knew so much about them!

Part of the fun is playing along with both parties reluctant to concede to the other that they know.

I've kept it simple this year. I just phrased it as going to the grotto. We will do the NORAD tracking, footprints and plate.

I'm enjoying them getting older. I had no love for the relentless slog of toddlerdom anyway (undiagnosed ASD made that a very long phase!). Children do grow up, that's the natural course of life. Embrace the phase they're in without rushing it.

7-8 is a pretty normal age to suss it - mine were both 7. We let them lead it and they both just came right out with it when they felt they needed to. DD1 was very discreet and made sure her younger sister wasn't around to hear!

And yes, it does make Christmas easier. We just made a new family ritual where we all went Christmas shopping together with a set budget for each person and we swapped who we shopped with halfway so we could all be appropriately secretive.