No support and friends let me down

[ArmchairPetroleuse]

Hello, Just wanted to put a few feelers out there to see if anyone else has been/is in a similar situation to me. I have a seven month old and apart from my partner who is great, there is no support network at all for us. I've been estranged from my family for many years and recently the support network I thought I'd built has collapsed as friends didn't/wouldn't understand and empathise with how hard it is raising a small baby. It really is just me, my partner and the baby.

Does anyone else have similar stories to tell? Any ideas on how to make this bearable-I'm already going to classes and other daytime activities but I'm still very much alone and finding it so hard. I'd really appreciate any feedback at all.

Thanks

Have you only been able to meet them with baby in tow? Is the conversation from your side revolving around motherhood ? As precious as our babies are to us it can be very boring to only focus on that for friends with no kids. Of course they should adjust a too but maybe try and meet them half way

Does your partner have a family he's close to or who live nearby?

I was in a bit of a similar situation, moved to a new area and had a baby before we’d really made any friends here. I tried out lots and lots of baby groups until I found ones where people were keen to make friends - I travelled a bit further than I might have done to try a wide range. I ended up then meeting people at groups who I also saw at other groups which was a good ‘in’ to start a chat and eventually, after slowly building up the chat over a couple of weeks, suggested a coffee outside the groups. We now have a WhatsApp group that has grown as others have invited more and more new mums and it’s a great support network. There are probably lots of other mums very keen to make friends with others with small children, I would say stick at it until you find them - build a new network, and don’t be disheartened if it takes a little time

We were 5000 miles from my family, and Dh was NC with most of his and only saw on Sis twice a year. So when Ds 2 was born we just got on with it. One of his friends stepped up when I went in labour and Ds1 slept at his overnight. Then my only friend who lived about 50 miles from us came by twice in the first week to see me.
That was it. I finally got a support network going once Ds 1 started school and more so when Ds 2 started school.
Other than that the kids were with me/us constantly.
I just decided to surrender myself to parenthood and enjoy myself with it. It's not depressing and lonely once you get your head around it. Now the two Ds's are grown we are very close, just not in distance.

I'm the only childless one in my friendship group- I try but really I have no idea about the best way to get your kid to sleep/food to wean/breast pumping tips. I just don't so trying to make convo when this is the main topic for 2+hrs is hard. Maybe see if from your friends side, they probably want to meet up but don't know how to communicate with you at times.

What specifically do you mean by not being empathetic ? That they don't want to go to baby friendly venues?