Hi, I'm similar to you, I had to have severe abnormal cells removed but the first time I was negative for HPV, retested after a year and all normal, at the next one I had no abnormal but HPV, this last one I've just had I have no HPV and no abnormal
I've basically had every combination possible of HPV and abnormal or just abnormal or just HPV
I'm always terrified when my smear comes around, I always convince myself that there's going to be something terrible there
But what I have been told by the nurse and have come to trust is that these abnormal cells may never even turn into cancer whether you have them treated or not, I used to look at it as wow I only just dodged cancer but that is not the case, it's just they COULD turn into cancer, so as a precaution are removed, and they are slow growing which is why we are able to go a year or 3 in between smears safely, basically the way I justify it to myself when I'm panicking is it would be nearly impossible if your smear was normal last year or even 3 years ago for something really sinister to have developed, grown and become deadly in that time, that's how I reassure myself anyway!
You have my sympathy though it's very difficult to not imagine something terrible!