What age is co-sleeping safe?

[Berrylove]

My 5 month dd sleeps in a cot right next to my bed and stays in there until about 6am when she won’t settle unless she comes in bed with me and then she’ll go back to sleep, then she’ll wake up at about 8 all happy and ready to start the day. I absolutely love these two hours we get to share together, it’s possibly my favourite time, just me and her. The thing is, I’d love to have her in bed with me for the whole night, and I know you can co-sleep safely, but frankly I don’t trust myself.
So I’d just like to know at what age does it become completely safe to co-sleep with her?

It's not so much a case of completely safe but of managing the risks. I'd look at the safe seven.

Possibly at risk of being flamed, but I co-sleep with my 7 week old and I have done since she was born. I don’t drink or smoke, neither does my husband (and baby is always on my left, he’s on my right, so he’s never next to baby anyway), I keep the duvet tucked around and under me, she’s well below the pillows. No pets sleep in our bedroom, our older child is in her room. Baby sleeps on her back on the mattress next to me. She cannot fall out of bed on her other side. I am following all the safe co-sleeping guidelines. I get a lot more, good quality, sleep than if I was constantly trying to get her settled in her crib.
Look at the Lullaby Trust safe co-sleeping guidelines.

I co-slept from birth with my third. My twins were about three week old before we caved and had them in bed with us all the time.

It is safe so long as you follow the guidelines. Ours were in sleeping bags at the head of the bed, we kind of shuffled ourselves down so the covers didn’t go over them. Obviously no drinking or smoking.

My mum was horrified when I told her, but for us it was a case of getting sleep or not. And sleep won out.

Co slept my all my three DC from birth - it was a conscious sleep so had done loads of research into how to make sure it’s safe. Co sleeping is NOT falling asleep with them in your arms because you’re so exhausted sitting up during a feed.

Co sleeping is completely safe when done properly. And it’s lovely. And it’s easy. And it’s way more comfortable than getting up every few hours!

*Conscious decision - not conscious sleep

I couldn't have stood it myself. There are lots of guidelines out there just Google it.

Thank you everyone, I’m aware of the rules that make co sleeping safe but at what age do you think that these rules don’t need to apply anymore and child can just sleep how they wish or all snuggled up? Kind of in the same way I don’t fear that I would smother my dp?

My DC is two and I still follow safe cosleeping guidelines. No pillow, DC in sleeping bag, DH not allowed to sleep next to the baby because he’s a much higher risk, etc. I let him choose his own sleeping position from about six months old, he often sleeps on his front.

Co sleeping is safe from birth if you do it safely, but you’re right, there is an age where it gets a bit more straightforward. I slept with my first until she was 3.5 and 2nd is about to turn 2 and we are still co sleeping.

I always slept with a duvet and pillow with mine from birth. When they were under 3-4 months or so, they mostly slept in a sidecar cot. Otherwise, I’m very aware of where I am and the duvet and there’s no way really it could be an issue (I have a whole double bed, dh sleeps in a single bed pushed next to me). But from around 9-12 months, they are much more mobile and can move themselves away from anything that isn’t quite right. In the early months, I wouldn’t drink before bed, but closer to a year I’m happy to have a drink in the evening (but not get drunk!). I’m well rested now and I’m no more likely to roll on my massive toddler after a couple glasses of wine with dinner than without. He also sleeps with his own pillow and duvet now (which he frequently puts over his head in his cot ), so I don’t stress about where the duvet and pillow are in bed (though obviously I try not to let him cover his head when I can).

Definitely from a year, things are much different and it’s more like sleeping with a small child than a baby. But this is all very dependent on what your sleeping space is like and how you and your baby tend to sleep. Co sleeping from birth is perfectly safe though as long as it’s well planned. The reality is that most babies co sleep and obviously nearly all of them do perfectly fine.

I coslept from birth. My son is now nearly 11 months and it's a total nightmare. He moves so much in his sleep that I barely get any. I would advise not cosleeping! I'm trying to get him into his cot now but it's a real struggle and he still ends up in with me.

We all sleep brilliantly bedsharing... Everyone is different.

Anyway back to the actual question:

Around 18 months from most things I've read.

My 20 month old now sleeps with a toddler pillow (can be used 1yr +) and their own duvet.