DD is in year 8. Dc1, so all high school fun and games are new to us.
DD is not a very loud person, and not very confident ( I had to refuse to pick her up to make her get the bus, she daren't ask the bus driver to pay to get off a different stop, if we go out shopping she likes to stay with me etc)
Anyway, when DD started high school it was without anyone from her primary school, so she had to start new friendships. DD met a girl who is very funny, very confident, they got on well, there was a group of them, usual small issues in that some not as close as others but there you go.
Over the summer holidays between year 7 and year 8 the main friend sent DD a message apologising for not being a very good friend, ignoring her at times, not waiting for her, letting DD pick up bags etc.... Asked DD to forgive her, DD being her usual self says thanks for apology, all ok. At no point over the summer holidays did anyone from the group get in touch with DD to meet up, and any suggestions she made were brushed off.
Back to school in Year 8, DD still with same crowd. DD made comment a couple of weeks ago that the main friend had asked DD to go pick up someone's bag for them. Straight away my Spidey senses tingle immediately thinking back to the message over summer holidays.
So I asked DD how things were, DD got really upset, no one takes up offer to meet up out of school, they all dropped out to do anything for her birthday, she waits for them after class but no one waits for her and soften when she waits the rest are walking out then sort of carry on without drawing DD into conversation, sometimes they do the whispering to each other in front of DD thing. Other meet ups were taking place but never including DD. But DD being so lacking in confidence means she is grateful for the bits of friendship she had.
So, I used the "When someone tells you who they are, listen" line (thankyou Mumsnet!) And told DD not to fall out or blank them.but to really make an effort to start hanging out with other people: to walk to the main bus centre not the bus stop across from school, sit with different people at lunch etc
Bless her, she is doing this, so fingers crossed for things to.improve. Already the 'best friend' figure has moved her things from DD during PE etc so there is the message that ties are being cut.
Basically, are there any other hints or tips seasoned high school mum's can think of that might help DD?