Dh wants to end our marriage

[unicornsrule]

Dh has had enough he isn't happy in our marriage anymore
We have been married for 16 years have a 10 year old dd and a 14 year old dd
What are our living options?

I'm so sorry.
How are you managing after what I presume was a huge bombshell?

Has he said he intends to move out? Where to? Do you think he might have somewhere lined up already? He may have been planning this for some time, whereas it's a shock to you.

So sorry to hear this OP. You may want to get your post moved to 'relationships' lots of great similar posts on that section.

Gosh didnt mean to say great that came out wrong...I meant you will receive some very good advice on that section

Very sorry to hear that bit of a shit time of year for him to spring this on you, not that there's ever a good time.

Would he consider counselling? Ask him how he sees the next few months working out.

You would be wise to get copies of as much financial info as you can and seek legal advice if you feel up to it. Do you have a good friend you can lean on for support?

Has he got someone to go to?

He has just said he has been having counselling at work which made him realise that he wants to separate!
No he has no where to go to!
We are going to make plans in January

Well, as he wants out he needs to find somewhere to live doesn’t he?

Yes i will be staying here

get a little hard here op, all the decisions seem to be his so far, he wants out? well, the fact he has nowhere to go is not your problem, he is an adult, he has decided to give up on his family, well then matey, out you go! take some control here, pack his bag for him, where he lives now is his responsiblity, not yours!

He can't cope anymore he wants to put the children first , how things are now he cant cope !! He has been breaking down alot and at work

cant cope with what? work? kids? being married? if he is suffering with depression then its a different ball game, is he talking to you? has he been to the docs? perhaps you should go with him and discuss this with the doctor, being married is supporting each other when the shit hits.

maybe this is the only way he can think of to show his distress?

if not, kick him out.

He definitely wants to seperate
Think i am in shock!!
We are going to discuss living arrangements in january
The main thing is the children we have 2 dds age nearly 11 and 14 years

You’re a better woman than me if you can bare to have him in the house til a discussion in January. If it’s over for him he needs to ship out now, not pretend for one last awful Christmas.

I'm so sorry to hear this op. Has he changed at all in the last few months? Been cagey with his phone? Going out more. Some people will advise you that there might be someone else.

Sorry OP, what a bombshell.
Had there been any signs?

This all seems on his terms. I would not be discussing living arrangements in Jan! Discuss them now. He expects you to carry on living with him after he’s told you it’s over?