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Working my notice period whilst a grievance for bullying is open

21 replies

DewDropsonKittens · 08/12/2019 18:33

Hello,

I have submitted my one month notice and presented a grievance against my closest working colleague to HR and the school head teacher.

On Friday she amped things up and was incredibly disrespectful towards me in front of our line manager who is becoming culpable

I am full of dread, anxiety and general angst about being in the same environment as her for the next week and a half

I really don't know what to do.. HR say they're on my side, the head of school says she will protect me. But I don't feel very protected

OP posts:
loutypips · 08/12/2019 18:35

Could you get signed off by your doctor for stress?

DewDropsonKittens · 08/12/2019 18:59

Hi @loutypips I could, however I would not be paid, in the run up to christmas I cannot afford to take the loss unfortunately

OP posts:
motortroll · 08/12/2019 19:07

Why would you not get paid? Do you not have sick pay?

loutypips · 08/12/2019 19:10

What about statutory sick pay?

DewDropsonKittens · 08/12/2019 19:19

@motortroll I haven't been there for long enough to contractually receive it

@loutypips the ssp is something like £15 a day after the first 3 unpaid

OP posts:
FeckaDecka · 08/12/2019 19:22

AET or other mismanaged academy trust I'm guessing...

DianaT1969 · 08/12/2019 19:26

How much contact do you need to have with her? As you are leaving anyway, can't you march up to her first thing tomorrow and say 'stay out of my way and don't even think about talking to me between now and the end of term." Tell the Head that anything she needs to tell you that is work related can go in an email or via a third party.

DewDropsonKittens · 08/12/2019 19:29

@FeckaDecka almost 😮

@DianaT1969 we make up 2 of a team of 3, our roles almost cross over

Is it acceptable for me to refuse all direct contact going forward? It is unbelievable how it has got

OP posts:
OhTheRoses · 08/12/2019 19:30

What did she do?
Have you actually called her out on it? A stony "if you wish me to do x, I'd be grateful if you were civil". I've only worked for one absolute bully and did as who she thought she was speaking to. She got the chop about 8 months later.

Bullies do exist but I'm not sure the grievance route helps if I'm honest.

Bluetrews25 · 08/12/2019 19:33

Bullying you in front of someone else is giving more weight to your complaint.
Can you reframe each snipe to be her shooting herself in the foot? Because she is, really. She's just proving you right.
Be strong, you are better than her.
Get yourself a treat for every night - bag of maltesers?
Remember - sticks and stones...

Bluetrews25 · 08/12/2019 19:36

PS I do know bullying is shit, having endured it at work myself and I do know words can really hurt, but just mutter 'sticks and stones' as a mantra to distract you....and TRY to believe it for the moment...

DewDropsonKittens · 08/12/2019 19:53

@OhTheRoses I understand what you're saying, however I do not have the personality or confidence to call someone out when I feel personally attacked.

I've attempted mediation with her, professional challenge and constantly been speaking with my line manager about things that happen.

Nothing has made a difference, as I am told "oh it is just the way she is" she doesn't behave like it towards others

OP posts:
DewDropsonKittens · 08/12/2019 19:55

The situation is so soul destroying, chocolate is being consumed in large amounts Haha

OP posts:
FeckaDecka · 08/12/2019 20:19

Best thing you can do is leave ASAP which is what you're doing. Work your notice without worry. Never be alone with them, even if you have to sit in the canteen with the kids every lunch and break. Or better yet go out of the school. Ask your HT and HR to issue your bullies with a no entry to your class unless with SLT.

FeckaDecka · 08/12/2019 20:20

Put this request in first thing tomorrow

Bluetrews25 · 08/12/2019 20:29

Actually, when I gave in my notice, I asked to be released asap, and not have to work my notice for the sake of my mental health due to the toxic work environment.
I was out in 2 weeks, should have been 2-3 months.
Helps that I had another job waiting for me.
Hope this helps others who may be in a similar position - suspect it will only work if they know a bit of what is going on.
Managed to find a great sample resignation letter online.

Keep on the choccy! Grin Good luck, OP.

Soontobe60 · 08/12/2019 20:30

Just keep remembering that you have resigned so you only need to tolerate her for a few more days. Just ignore her, walk away, don't engage with her at all.

DewDropsonKittens · 08/12/2019 20:42

@FeckaDecka thank you, I will do that in the morning as I need to tell them about the incident on friday.

I have a new job to go to starting on the 6th Jan, I am so glad we have Christmas holidays

The impact on my health right now is horrendous

OP posts:
FeckaDecka · 09/12/2019 19:45

@DewDropsonKittens how was today?Flowersxx

chocolateisavegetable · 09/12/2019 19:51

union?

Pumpkintopf · 09/12/2019 20:02

You need to speak to HR again. The fact that your line manager is witnessing this behaviour without taking action does indeed put them also in a bad light as you suggest.

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