I’ve obviously namechanged for this.
Long backstory is that my ex husband is an alcoholic with an accompanying drug problem. I left him several years ago because he had crossed well over into being physically and mentally abusive and although I loved him, I couldn’t save him and he didn’t want to be saved.
The divorce was very messy and he fell out with all his family and friends in the end as it finally became clear to them how awful he’d been. They are still in contact with me and I care very much about them but have always been grateful my marriage and divorce are far behind me these days.
Today I found out he’s missing and has been for a couple of months. No one knows where he is and his alcoholism and drug use had been out of control. His family seem only a little upset but not at all surprised. They honestly said they expect to not hear anything unless he ends up in jail or dead.
I guess I’m posting because I feel very churned up about it all. I feel so horrifically was that this is where we are and yet not surprised. And yet I feel quite numb about it. I haven’t shed a tear. And at the same time it’s pulled me right back to thinking about that awful time in my life.
Sorry I don’t really know why im posting, but just needed to write it all down.