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Original poster

Can I avoid contact with midwives after birth?

43 replies

GiveMeABreakAlready · 05/12/2019 15:05

I am currently pregnant with DC2. My pregnancy care and birth of DC1 was all through the NHS. I did not have a good experience and this time I have gone private for my pregnancy care and the birth.

I have been advised that after the birth I will be discharged to the care of my local NHS community midwife team (who I have not had any contact with during this pregnancy). I am wondering if anyone can tell me how many appointments I need to have with the community midwives, if any? I am worried that if I don’t engage with them at all that it could cause problems eg that I will be flagged up to social services as not engaging with health professionals.

I did not have a good experience with the community midwives team during my first pregnancy or immediately after my DC’s birth. Combined with horrible treatment on the postnatal ward meant that overall I had a very negative experience. Much of the issues with the community midwifery team I am certain were down to them being completely overstretched but the whole experience was very difficult (on top of a traumatic birth) and I don’t really want anything to do with them after DC is born.

OP posts:

moanyhole · 05/12/2019 16:16

My experience mirrored yours after my first birth but the support I got from midwives after my 2nd and 3rd was fabulous.

Nicknacky · 05/12/2019 16:16

GiveHerHell And you think telling the Op that the police will be involved is “helping”? And your link mentions nothing about this law.

Incorrect by the way.

vinoandbrie · 05/12/2019 16:17

Can you google to find an independent midwife near you? The post-birth support cost should not be extortionate, and would buy you peace of mind. I had a wonderful independent midwife in North London, let me know if you would like her details.

Interested in this thread?

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3rd trimester Childbirth Families General pregnancy

AlexaAmbidextra · 05/12/2019 16:17

Absolutely no law in that link stating midwives have a legal right to gain entry to a woman’s house.

Correct. In addition that link refers to Health Visitors, not midwives.

vinoandbrie · 05/12/2019 16:19

Oh, I did have a midwife turn up on the doorstep. I explained to her that I was under the care of an independent midwife, thank you for your time and goodbye. She didn’t come in. No further contact.

GiveHerHellFromUs · 05/12/2019 16:20

@IWorkAtTheCheesecakeFactory the word 'mandatory' gives you a clue. It was something I was told verbally so I can't provide written evidence that the MW can gain lawful entry.

Why would you deny your child mandatory care anyway?

The visits are as much for baby as they are for mom.

hiredandsqueak · 05/12/2019 16:21

Midwife didn't visit dd at home at all after birth of dgs six months ago. She had to go to clinic for the heel prick and routine weigh in (one visit) and again to be discharged at ten days. Midwife told her that home visits were no longer routine and mums and babies were expected to go to the clinic instead. Dd liked that she could turn up without an appointment and could have on any day outside those pre arranged appointments.

IWorkAtTheCheesecakeFactory · 05/12/2019 16:21

It was something I was told verbally so I can't provide written evidence that the MW can gain lawful entry.

Thought as much.

As you were.

OP happily ignore any assertions that anyone apart from the police with a warrant has a legal right to enter your home.

Nicknacky · 05/12/2019 16:22

GiveHerHell So you are happy to admit then that a MW cannot enforce entry to a home?

The op isn’t avoiding care for her child, it sounds like she is happy to pay. And great if she does, less pressure for the community staff then.

GiveHerHellFromUs · 05/12/2019 16:25

@Nicknacky I've just confirmed that I can't find any evidence so happy to admit I'm wrong.

I'll do a little bit of research before believing things like that in future 👍🏻

OP apologies for my error

SpruceTree · 05/12/2019 16:36

In this country, as long as you are mentally competent, you can refuse any medical care you wish, even if it results in harm to yourself.

Whattodoabout · 05/12/2019 16:40

They usually discharge you after ten days I’d all is well and they only come maybe three or four times, they don’t stay for a long time at all.

Health visitors are more of a pain.

Whattodoabout · 05/12/2019 16:41

You need the midwife to carry out the heel prick, maybe check your stitches if necessary and also for any breastfeeding support or advice if your DC has jaundice etc. Don’t dismiss them.

Original poster

GiveMeABreakAlready · 05/12/2019 16:43

Thank you for all of these responses. I had completely forgotten about the heel prick test and course DC will need to be weighed.

The appointments I had last time were at home rather than at a clinic, because I had had a c-section, although I was told mannnnny times how lucky I was to be seen at home and it was made clear to me that this put extra pressure on their time.

I will mull over getting a private midwife; does anyone have any idea of rough costs for a midwife just to do the after birth appointments? I guess I am a little hesitant as the birth itself will obviously be a lot of money, the insurance only covers so much. But it sounds like it could be the best option.

I know a few brief appointments sounds like a no-brainer but my experience was really difficult last time round, I felt like I was treated like an inconvenience or ignored ata time when I felt vulnerable and I’d already had some very uncaring treatment at the hospital. I don’t want to have another bad experience and get really down again.

OP posts:

ClaudiaWankleman · 05/12/2019 16:45

@GiveHerHellFromUs
I think you might just be misunderstanding the wording in that link, as it isn't completely clear.
I think that This week, the government announced its intention to continue the requirement for local authorities to commission five universal health visiting checks for families means that there is a legal obligation for LAs to offer at least 5 health checks covering certain areas. I don't think it obliges the parent to accept. A way to end a certain postcode lottery of post natal care.

Original poster

GiveMeABreakAlready · 05/12/2019 16:49

@vinoandbrie would you mind sharing roughly how much your midwife cost?

OP posts:

ditsybag · 05/12/2019 18:07

I'm in London and round here it'd be just under a grand for postnatal care with an independent midwife. But if you discussed with them that you wanted much fewer visits, they might see you for cheaper. You can find ones near you by googling or searching on imuk.org.uk/families/find-a-midwife/

yummychoccy · 05/12/2019 19:34

I think I had MWs visit there day after we got home from hospital, then a visit on day 5 for heel prick. Then it depends whether you need more support with feeding etc but I think they visit once more at day 10 ish to discharge if all is well.

It's worth thinking about the benefits of seeing them a few times. We found the bf support really helpful with both my babies. Also they can pick up on things like jaundice.

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