People with young DC who don't do Elf on the Shelf- what do you tell them?

[TheCraicDealer]

DD is only ten weeks old so we're a while off this being an issue, but I'm genuinely curious.

Most of the parents on my social media seem to do this Elf on the Shelf shite and I just can. Not. Be. Bothered. I can get on board with Santa sneaking into the house to leave presents by ~MaGiC~, but I don't want DD thinking we have security issues with repeated breaches

Anyway because it now seems to have become such a thing I'm a bit worried that once she gets to childcare/nursery/school she'll ask me why the elves don't come to our house. I'm shit at thinking on my feet so I need to have a response sorted to spring out when the question comes. So if you've been asked what did you tell them?

[TooStressyTooMessy]

Loads of my kids’ friends have it. I just say I have enough to do and am not organised enough to look after an elf in the house at the busiest time of the year. They seem happy with that as they have seen my housekeeping skills .

[BlackSwanGreen]

My DC have never asked!

[DippyAvocado]

“We don’t do that in our family”

This. Then take them to Tesco to show all the elves being sold in their boxes.

[PeterRouseTheFleshofMankind]

My kids have never asked either - they are excited about their own Xmas and what we are going to be doing at Xmas and what they are going to be getting.

Kids are quite self centred like that, I don't think they give a shit about what's happening in other households as long as they think those presents are coming

[CountFosco]

It could be worse, we now have a Naughty Elf at work. So now we get bloody emails about where this elf is throughout the day.

[NeedAnExpert]

We don’t do santa, never mind elves. Never been an issue. We don’t encourage following the crowd unthinkingly.

[HippyChickMama]

We use the Santa Spy Cam app. You can take "photos" of elves where the elves are moving. Dd thinks we have elves but that they move so quick you don't see them without a special camera on your phone and that our elves aren't naughty like the ones that are in some people's houses.

[Therarestone]

We haven't done it, DCs 4 and 6, neither has asked this year why the elf hasn't shown up, they know their friends have them but they haven't said anything about ours thankfully. I think we often overestimate how much our children think about these things.

Mine never asked why they don't get as much as other kids either so I also think that's all blown way out of proportion in my experience

[ThursdayLastWeek]

We use the ‘only naughty kids need one' too TBH, alongside 'we just dont'

[TheElfFellOffTheShelf]

My youngest, 7, is afraid of them because they're mean and do naughty things. I've tried saying that it doesn't live here and it it came I'd be telling it to bugger off and I've tried saying that it's not real, it's a toy you buy from the shop (we've even seen it in Tesco's along with those godawful Santa cams) and that it's only the parents who are doing it but to no avail.

The 8 y old Know it's fake so isn't bothered.

I've said lots of times that Santa comes anyway, regardless of whether you're good on not, so we don't need a stupid elf pretending to spy on us and reporting back.

[Pootle40]

Has never come up once in her house. Never did it as a child, don't understand tradition or where it came from and have no intention of starting......

[enjoyingscience]

DS11 is too old - the trend pre dates him. DS5 has never noticed it, so it’s not a chat I’ve ever had to have! If it came up it would be a ‘oh, we don’t do that in our house’, and he would move on. It’s as simple as that. He’s got friend of other faiths and has never been hung up or confused by not celebrating eid or Diwali or whatever.

I think the elf thing is going to get passé very soon anyway.

[BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz]

We did the elf one year. Five days in we told dc "the elf chooses when and if to come. So he may not come next year"

Thankfully both of their teachers do elves in the classroom.

[wotsittoyou]

I told dd that we didn't have one because I was uncomfortable with, among other things, children being encouraged to believe that what they received at Christmas was something to do with their individual worthiness - when it's simply to do with their parents' ability and inclination to buy stuff. Some kids get nothing, and it's nothing to do with them being 'bad'. She said, "that's terrible!", then promptly bought 11 of the things and made them individual outfits. Loves them.

[m0therofdragons]

I said I'm not creative enough and am busy enough. Dd said "but my teacher said he comes to your house and causes mischief so all you need to do is invite him!" (Thanks teacher ) so I just went with "oh I don't know then. The elves probably think we have enough Christmas traditions in our house."

[Numbersarefun]

I had a tonttu (elf) in the 1970s. So it’s not that new!

[Love51]

My 8 year old has never asked. My 6 year old asked for the first time last year. Their childminder did it a few years back but they accept that people have their own family ways, and didn't ask.
We do get deliveries from an elf, who gives us jobs to do, but we never see her! She only comes at night, and as of last year, not on school days. I think the 8 year old knows but goes along with everything, with the 6 year old it is hard to tell. And I'm not going to ask him!
If your child does ask, your answer will vary by age, their personality, and why they are asking. You'll give a great answer!

[Fucket]

We don’t have one, but I have seen other kids allowed them out and about like toy dolls. In pretty sure all the children know they are not real. I mean come on, it’s only the parents who are pretending they are!

[LER83]

I said he came but scared the cat so he doesn't come anymore. The cat has just died, dd asked if the elf would come this year, I said no he's not coming as a sign of respect for the cat . Can't be doing with bloody elves!

[Legomadx2]

We never did it and mine simply never asked. I wouldn't bother lying about it, I'd just say we don't do that.

[TheCraicDealer]

It could be worse, we now have a Naughty Elf at work. So now we get bloody emails about where this elf is throughout the day.

Oh (Ho?) fuck off! I think I'd resign.

i think the elf thing is going to get passé very soon anyway.

As someone who lives by the mantra, "if Poundland have their own version, you're too late", I think you might be right. One of the most prolific shelfers I was friends with on Facebook has been very quiet this year and doesn't seem to have bothered- I might be in luck!

I suppose you can only think of so many elf related japes before you run out of ideas 🤷🏼‍♀️

[TheCraicDealer]

I said no he's not coming as a sign of respect for the cat

Ok this is my favourite

[Stompythedinosaur]

I used to be a parent who didn't do the elf. Right up until the dc asked with big doggy eyes whether they might get an elf if they were really good (and I realised that every bloody other family do it) and I caved and got an elf.

I don't love it now, but have warmed a little towards the elf thing. It is a pita but the dc do really enjoy it.

[iMatter]

Day 1

Dog ate the Elf

The end

[gingerninja99]

My kids told me it's just the mummy's and daddy's making the elf do things and it's not real and I agreed
They are now 8 & 5 and ask for one but I say no chance am i faffing about with that flipping elf!
They believe everything else- Santa, tooth fairy, easter bunny but they just never believed in that naughty elf!