Toddler headbutts and punches for attention

[Motherofmonsters]

Hi,

My DS is 2 and has started head butting and hitting for attention. He used to bite/pull hair when he was over excited which stopped and now he's moved on to punching and headbutting.

I spend hours sat on the floor playing and interacting with him so he does get lots of attention.

He's started doing it to other children now and it really does hurt. I'm not sure how to tackle it as it's not something I can ignore but he gets attention by doing it. Whether that's me telling him no and removing him from the situation or the other child crying/reacting.

He headbutted his 3year old.cousin really hard after she stopped playing with him and went off to do something else and she properly cried understandably. He ran off after he did so I think he knows it was wrong.

Any thoughts as no one is going to want to meet up with us soon

Thank you

He ran off after he did so I think he knows it was wrong.
I don't think that means he knows it is wrong, it could mean he knows he will get into trouble as a consequence.
Try to explain about empathy, and why we use it to make rules. Say that what he is doing hurts other people the same way it would hurt him if they did it to him. So the rule is no one is allowed to hurt, and we can all play without getting hurt.
Tell him that if he feels like hurting someone he should come and stand with you instead, until the feeling goes away. then you can praise him for managing it.
I think you also need to supervise him very closely, and remove him at the first sign of trouble. If you think he is about to get frustrated, get his attention and direct him towards an alternative activity.

I would use time out/naughty step for this.
If he does it, then instantly remove, don't engage. Take him to a quiet area, sit him down and tell him face to face that headbutting/hitting is not nice and he will sit there to think about it. Ignore him for 2 minutes - if you are out and about, just stand next to him, not looking directly at him and not engaging in any talk.
At the end of two minutes, get down to his level, tell him again he is not to do it. Give him a hug, and if you can take him to say sorry.

This will ensure that he is not getting attention for bad behaviour.