Would you make DS go to this?

[hidinginthenightgarden]

DS hates sports because he has a fear of getting hurt. This has happened on 2 occasions where he has fell and got hurt whilst playing sport. We go to a gym with a kids club and every sunday he complains about going but when he gets there (I have a sneaky look through the window) and he joins in and enjoys it.
Today a letter came home asking for permission for DS to attend a multisports event involving loads of different schools. His whole school will be going unless they are not given permission. There is nothing stating what will happen if they don't get permission.
I spoke to DS who said he doesn't want to go because " there will be loads of kids running around and I might get hurt". My instinct is telling me to sign the trip and make him go. He needs to get over this fear of sports and that I am doing him no favours by holding him back from the trip. I am conscious though that he may feel that I am disregarding his feelings and be upset on the day or anxious. DS is 7 and does show signs for anxiety, he also has tinnitus so too much noise makes him uncomfortable and sometimes upset.
Would you sign the form for him to go?

Can you talk to the school and tell them the issue? How is he with school pe?

Ooh this is tricky. By keeping him away you may be reinforcing his fear that he will get hurt but by making him go seems like you’re not listening to him and acknowledging his anxiety and tinnitus.

I too think you need to talk to the school and say exactly what you’ve said here. The teacher needs to be aware of his anxiety so they can help him overcome it.

I would make him go and give him a lot of reassurance in the lead up to it including that even if he does fall over etc then it’s ok, it might hurt a little but won’t hurt forever.
I think that by not going it’s reinforcing his anxiety and making him think that you believe he might get hurt. I also think it’ll make it harder to get him to go things that are similar in the future.

Sorry meant to add that of course he should go but only if he knows someone will be there to “watch out” for him.

I think I would want to encourage him to go, as you say you're doing no favours in allowing him to swerve things because of a fear he might get hurt. However I'd also want to get him some help with his anxiety, maybe try reading some books with him about kids who do things which are scary, and check out some anxiety management techniques for kids and practice them with him, also talking through what happened when he got hurt, understanding what exactly it is that's scaring him. It's important I think to acknowledge his fears, and help him manage them. I had terrible anxiety as a child and teenager, but it wasnt until I reached adulthood and found there was a name for how I felt, that it became more manageable.

Thanks ladies. I will speak to the teacher this morning. She is really good and has actively taken steps to manage his tinnitus in class so that it doesn't distract him so much.
I will speak to my DS again and I will probably sign the form for him to go.