Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Social exclusion.

6 replies

Awesome7 · 28/11/2019 00:42

Did that person, really not hear me say hello? As I passed them on the school gates ?Am I really talking that quietly?Funny my child seems to hear me just fine, as I walk past all the mothers at the school gates I am starting to think its a school for hard of hearing, because I have lost count the amount of times I have said hello only to be blanky ignored.
So I question what is it.what do I stand for single mum? who doesn't own a car have a flashy husband with flashy white teeth.
Oh and I don't have amples of time to talk about after school activites as I am just trying to earn a crust doing a job made for two .Ok maybe its me? maybe I really need to accept I really am not worth talking to, because when its me and another mother talking to another mother I blankly get sounded out.unheard invisible did I really get knocked down by a car on the way to school and I am now a ghost who never realised they died. And I am still trying to live a human life and the only ones that talk and interact with me, are those with some sixth sense which has a ability to see me, the true me so my life in school is getting smaller my life outside of school is getting bigger trying to feel my life with meaningful people who I can truly connect with, that can see me hear me know the true me .
But I have a die hard nature, I keep trying with these people that blanky ignore me I make excuses I think they are tired, they didn't hear me? I should talk louder? they are stressed have domestic abusive husbands or wives that they have lost there confidence. my excuses for them goes on because I just want to believe they are compassionate human being just like I am that actually care about your feelings, your soul who you are, and each day my light gets smaller and smaller because I can't accept the glaring truth that I am not respected I stand for nothing I am just a single mum and my inner life means nothing they don't even ask who I am? or what do I do are they scared of what I stand for.Or are they afraid of something.a lurking husband stealer or something ha its so laughable I have resigned to a single life because I am very stubborn and won't take a lot of crap .I have a radar for any forms of abuse that stretched 100 miles.Not following the herd comes with a huge weight at times one being loneliness two standing out like a sore thumb.And not getting invited and the more you get excluded the more you get excluded someone has to be the scapegoat I guess.the one who wears the shadow of everyone else.Ok so now I have come to the awesome bit.I am a worthy amazing human being just like you all are and what ever people want to project in my direction is really only that.I know through life standards I may have failed the social game card as I often find myself with a bad hand. but maybe its time to stop playing the game and give my self permission, to be ok just as I am. As people come and go like the weather yet the sun always shines even if concealed.I don't need their approval to define who I am.And on that note I will bow out a happy ghost.At least those with real meaning and purpose can see me and connect without editing who one is to fit in with the herd.funny that herd and heard sounds the same does the herd get heard.but the unherd. Gets unheard.

OP posts:
UnitedRoad · 28/11/2019 06:05

I’m emotional after another night with no sleep, but you’ve made me cry.

It’s easy to suggest you just stop bothering. Ignore them, and rise above, but I know it’s much harder than that.

You’re not a ghost, any more than I’m not a moomin (soft and squashy, no backbone, no feelings that get hurt), but I totally understand what you’re saying.

I don’t have any advice, I just wish sudden diarrhoea on those playground bitches.

Awesome7 · 28/11/2019 09:13

Thanks so much for writing back unitedRoad.great user name by the way.

OP posts:
queenjaneapprox · 28/11/2019 09:26

I feel the same. Get it from my neighbours too. When my ex was here all chatty and jolly now they barely say hello.

Awesome7 · 28/11/2019 10:11

Hi Jane that's hard it really does hit some deep pain places this stuff and I wish there was a simple answer, and solution but doesn't ever feel like one. And my fear is if confronted you would be made to feel its all in your imagination.The way I am dealing with it is building friendships outside school but it doesn't seem to take the pain out of it as you have to visit the school 10 times a week.it does dominate your day.And its hard not to conclude something awful about your self when you experience the exclusion time and again.i think my best bet is to listen to some positive music or positive affirmation while I am waiting.hopefully it will drown out the noise of the negativity.Wish you well thanks for replying.

OP posts:
queenjaneapprox · 28/11/2019 11:08

Thanks Awesome, it really does hit deep. I put some music on loud this morning after the school run, great minds etc!

Awesome7 · 28/11/2019 12:00

Hi Jane I found this really interesting.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page