Someone please tell me it will be okay!

[GoBrookeYourself]

So I’ve been feeling really anxious recently- we have just moved home but the new house needed a lot of work doing to it so we’ve been living with in laws until it’s done. It’s been about 5 weeks and we’ve finally got boxes in the new house and have just started unpacking.

The problem is I can’t help but feel terrified that we’ve done the wrong thing. DH and I slept here last night (DS aged 2 slept at MILs) to get a head start on unpacking and I feel so overwhelmed. I was so excited to move here and the house sale/purchase took the best part of a year so it’s not like i haven’t had time to prepare but I feel so anxious and just like sitting and crying.

This sounds ridiculous because I didn’t like our old house as much but I can’t help but miss it- I felt like I KNEW it and I don’t feel like I’ll ever grow to love this house. There’s so much to do, DS comes back in a few hours and I’m just wracked with nerves. Has anyone else felt this way? Please tell me it’s quite normal when moving and I haven’t made a huge mistake! For what it’s work we still live in the same area, just bigger/nicer house and just down the road from DPILs.

It will be absolutely fine. This is normal. It's a big transition and one of the most stressful things you'll ever do, but once you're all unpacked and have started to settle in, you will start to love your new house. Picture it all cosy and decorated for Christmas. Engineer a way to say hello to your immediate neighbours so you don't feel so isolated. I felt exactly the way you do - I remember it well.

I think it's quite normal. When we moved into current house (my dream house) I spent the evening crying and telling my poor DH I wanted to home. I was a bit out of sorts for a couple of days. I put it down to the enormity of it all.

Thank you spiderlight, the neighbours have all introduced themselves (the ones directly next door have done so 3 times so far!) and seem lovely. We’ve spent the whole morning doing just the bedroom and bathroom and only just finished them. I feel so lethargic and feel like I could bolt and run far far away. Poor DH is being great about it but doesn’t understand fully

Thank you imnotalpharius, I did exactly the same last night at about 5am. Woke up DH in a panic telling him we’d made a huge mistake and needed to sell this house immediately as it wasn’t right for us. Haha I hope it only lasts a couple of days! I really thought this was my dream home too thank you for the reassurance both of you

This was me last week! In our dream home but I felt we had made a massive mistake! I wanted to go 'home' so badly. As PP has said I think it is literally the stress/enormity of it.
But somehow a week later I now love it and feel better.
Think about the loveliness of getting it ready for DS for their first really aware Christmas. I am so excited here now to make it so pretty for Christmas.

When I bought my first house I'd viewed it three times, was sure I really wanted it, but it was in a terrible state as had been rented out for years.

I picked up the keys, let myself in and sat on the floor and balled my eyes out for an hour, utterly terrified about the work need, the responsibility and just about everything else.

It was all fine, took a while to get sorted and there were some more tears along the way, but I did it eventually and you wouldn't know it was the same place now. I'm really proud of it.

You'll be fine once it's starts to take shape. Make some lists, perhaps get DS's room straight first so he's more settled with his bits around him.

The whole selling/buying/packing/staying with family rigmarole is incredibly stressful too, be kind to yourself, drink wine, go to the chippy!

It will be okay! Take it step by step and as you unpack visualise the rooms being filled with light and love, of happy times, celebrations and big life events. Close your eyes picture roots growing from your feet into the cool, soothing ground undetneath. Feel your body relax and grow one with your surroundings as you ground yourself. Then see a white light surrounding yourself and gradually growing to fill the whole house. Keep this light around you for a couple of minutes until you are really relaxed. Then make a list of which room you are going to start in. Do it one chunk at a time. Keep imagining pouring love, joy and happiness into the rooms as you go. If there is a song that will help you do this then play music. Reward yourself in between rooms with a cup of tea, or ten minutes tv etc until it is done. Think of one thing you will buy for each room to make it really feel like home. A week from now, you will be settled and getting cosy!

Ok or just moan on the internet instead. One or the other 😀🤪

Thank you all for your reassurance. It’s funny how a group of people you’ve never met can make you feel better isn’t it?

My DH keeps saying give it a few weeks and if it doesn’t feel right, we’ll sell and move! Which is so sweet but the thought of doing this all over again fills me with dread

Totally normal, I've done this every time I've moved, and it's always been fine after a little while. It's a big change and a lot of money is involved if you've just bought the place. Be kind to yourself, get on with the things you need to do, and things will settle

Oh I did this when I moved. Totally hated it at first despite loving the house. Everything felt wrong ! The noises were different . I felt so jumpy and thought I would never settle. And oh how i wished I had never moved !
But after a few months I started to relax and I adore my house now ! So glad we moved here. In fact I regularly dream we have moved again and I wake in a panic because I love my house so much and the relief when I realise it is only a dream is overwhelming.
Dont worry it really WILL be okay x