How do you dine?

[notmarthastewart]

Spent the day with a friend whose company I really enjoy, and let her know she was welcome to eat with us and we would take her home afterward. She declined because she needed to get back in time to 'set things up' by which I knew that she meant setting her table for the main meal. As long as I've know her, she's always made a point of celebrating mealtimes when everyone is together and really does present a beautifully set table.

After she'd gone, I walked the dog then started to prepare our own evening meal, wondering if I should make more of an effort for my family. I feel a bit guilty that I just set a basic table (no flowers or anything) then we all pile around, munching our way through our meal and talking if we want to - or not. We haven't come to any harm, but I do think it would be nice if we made more of the main meal which, for us, is our 'tea'. We're not all in at the same time on Sundays anymore so don't have the 'Sunday Roast' though I fondly remember those of my childhood and teens.

So I'm wondering, do any of you make a special effort for your main meal, whether lunch or evening? Do you use special crockery and tableware? If you do, is it a tradition you've continued from home or something you started anew with your own family?

And what about singles? Do you set the table for yourself? I confess when I was single I mostly used a little picnic table and ate whilst watching television. Common, I know

Nope - cutlery, napkins and that's it. We used to have our rice in a nice pot in the centre of the table but since we got a rice cooker it just stays in the rice cooker on the kitchen counter and we help ourselves.

My one special effort is cutting fruit every evening and arranging it on one of the nice plates.

One of the kids sets the table for dinner every night; no tablecloth, simple white plates, nice cutlery, glasses, one of those glass stoppered bottles full of water and the necessary condiments.

Sometimes I plate up, sometimes the food is in dishes in the middle of the table and we help ourselves. No phones at the table, no TV. We all have a good chat and a bit of a laugh.

It’s not posh, but it’s quite civilised.

For napkins we use reusable washcloths. Everyone just grabs the cutlery they need and brings their reusable water bottle for the day to the table. It’s extremely casual.

I can set a proper table and all that, but I just don’t see the point for a regular meal.

I set the table like this
Knives and forks
Plates
Salt, pepper, tomato sauce
Kitchen roll as napkins.
Mug of tea, milk for dd.

I do make the effort to have a nice table if we have friends over for dinner

My house doesn't have a dining room and the living room is too small for any kind of table - we eat on our laps. I do get a fold out table in for Christmas which is lovely, but too big for daily use. Humph, feeling a bit sad now... Still we always have a chat and a laugh.

Oh goodness, you set your own table. That's what servants are for.

Regular nights it's basic- white plates, glasses, knives and forks jug of water for the table. Food on serving plates in the middle. We are Jewish so Friday nights we do a proper shabbat dinner with candles/prayers etc plus flowers and a slightly nicer dinner and table setting tho not particularly fancy. I do like doing it though and love the ritual even though we are not particularly religious. Dinner is generally one of my favourite times of day and we usually have a laugh together

I always lay the table with cutlery, glasses, appropriate condiments etc. DH will throw the cutlery in a pile in the middle of the table!
I do like the mealtime catchup and general chit chat, it's lovely. No phones at table, maybe some music playing in the background.

I set the table before I cook dinner. Placemats, napkins, cutlery, glasses and condiments (but a bottle of ketchup always ends up in fro t of the youngest 🤣).
I plate up at the island so no serving plates for weeknight dinners, only Sunday or other special occasions. Same goes for candles or centrepieces

No. I put the plates of food on the table with cutlery on or next to the plates. We don't use a table cloth or table mats (we used to use table mats sometimes, I don't know why we don't anymore or where they have gone). The plates don't always match. We don't own matching wine glasses anymore.
I really value all 4 of us sitting together for a family meal as often as possible given that I am at work at dinner time 2 or 3 times a week and sometimes DH has other plans, but I don't have the time or energy to present the table/ meal in any special way.

Single, low effort food on tray in front of tv. Visitors, dining room, table, china, glasses, candles if special, etc. And more washing up than anyone should have to face. Two or three times a year.

I only set the table for Christmas dinner, by which I mean I use a tablecloth and tablemats! We don't have "special" cutlery or crockery, we have one crockery set that is newer and not yet chipped!

They're a bunch of barbarians in my house, if I use a tablecloth one of the kids would absentmindedly tug at it until everything slid of the table, it would be stained within minutes. I can't even put cutlery on the table until we all sit down or it ends up on the floor or being used as drumsticks/weapons.

I try and make an effort at the weekend but I don't have the time or the inclination to do things 'properly' after a full day at work!

I don't keep anything for special occasionsand it only takes a few seconds. Denby pottery, nice wine glasses even if we're only having water, candles, table runner, proper napkins and we have comfy velvet chairs.

Generally sofa, cushion on lap plate on cushion. Occasionally dp shames me into getting us all to eat at the table but most of the time I just cba with it all. We always ate at the table when I was a kid so not sure why it hasn't rubbed off.

I love a set table, in reality we all work different shifts and eat at different times and often different things so it would be at the kitchen island alone or on our knees or at the table alone or if the mood takes me in bed with a glass of wine. 😀

We have tablecloth, placemats, napkins, cutlery and condiments - sometimes wine, sometimes water. Mostly there are just two of us but it is the same whether it is two, four or more. On special occasions we may have candles, flowers, posher crockery etc.

On the rare occasion me & teen DD sit together to eat it's on the sofa watching TV with phones around. It works for us!

When DP comes round for dinner we sit at the table but only with basic stuff on it (place mats, cutlery, coasters) and TV is still on.

I guess meal times are more a functional time than a special occasion for us, but we do still chat!

I live alone now, but still try to make dinner a little special for myself. The correct glasses for whatever I'm drinking, nice crockery for the meal, and special bowls for things like olives for aperos.

In a previous life, I often did the flowers/candles/linen napkin stuff, but it turns out that I needn't have bothered.

Set the table every evening meal and lunch if home.

Placemats and cotton napkins (we have our own silver napkin rings, so clean ones can be reused by the same person), wine glasses (if dinner time), condiments and silver cutlery laid by each place. Matching plates - I’ve got loads of different sets as I tend to buy them at antique fairs (along with the silver cutlery and servers). Flowers on the kitchen table all the time so they just stay there.

More formal meals (guests, Christmas etc) would be eaten in the dining room and would see the addition of a table cloth.

No phones, no tv ever.

Weekday meals aren't a sit down together event for us. Everyone is in and out at different times due to work, clubs etc.

We try and do a nice Sunday lunch together. That involves all sitting together at the table. The "centre piece" is more likely to be a jar of horseradish or apple sauce etc rather than flowers.

Christmas Day is probably the only day we have an elaborate table with candles, flowers, napkins, crackers etc. Even then though a lot of it will get moved off the table so we can fit the food on.

Going to that much effort every day would not suit our lifestyle at all. If your friend likes to do it then that's obviously fine but it sounds far too time consuming to me!

DD has school dinners about 95% of the time so she has a light tea sometime after school. DH often finishes work quite late so the two of us tend to eat on our laps, watching tv. Saturday nights we usually have pizza, again in front of the tv. The only day we sit at the table together is Sunday. I don’t do anything special ( did invest in a wipe clean tablecloth recently). The only time I make an effort is Christmas Day

I live alone and work long hrs so it's hard to find the time / effort.
But I always eat at the dinning table ( no table cloth ) with a place mat and candle .
I got in to the bad habit of drinking alcohol with ever meal so now I have a bog standard pint glass of water .
I tend to be a bit of lazy ass with some food if I am having a curry , chilli etc I serve it in a huge bowl and just use a spoon to shovel eat with .

No. Cultlery crockery drinks and condiments. We don’t entertain.

We always have a table runner except during December when I put the Santa table cloth and Santa hat chair backs on! There’s always a candle on the table and in December this is an advent one which burns while we eat. In spring/summer we have flowers from the garden usually in a little vase and then in autumn/winter a little plate of fir cones/holly etc In one corner, near youngest DD there is usually a pile of homework/colouring/dolls to complete the look