Friends!

[aliphil]

DD: Me and [best friend, male] have a problem, because people keep saying we're in love.

They are 7 and 8, as are the children who keep trying to tell them how they feel. WTF is wrong with people that their children are coming out with this crap?

??

Oreo, what's not clear?

I think it’s fairly standard playground fare, isn’t it...?

Someone far more qualified could explain it better also not at 3am but surely it’s to do with kids seeking to place things in (often heteronormative) social boxes, or just experimenting with labels, or teasing because of perceived deviance from these boxes?

Is it upsetting your DD and does she feel it’s teasing?

Yeah, that's pretty normal. My son had a really good female friend in yrs 3/4 and they both used to get teased loads about it.

I don’t think there is anything wrong with parents whose children say this? That seems an extreme and aggressive reaction. For what it’s worth I’ve taught 7-8 year olds for years and we get it all the time “so and so said Johnny is my boyfriend but he is isn’t”. It’s really not that offensive surely?

DS1's best friend is a girl and they've had this from other children every now and then.

They've known each other since they were tiny and have always ignored it, which seems the best response.

I think it is parents making faux- cute comments about girlfriends and boyfriends and thinking it is hilarious or endearing in some way. I find it annoying and offensive that girls and boys can't just be friends in a straightforward way. It can ruin the friendship, actually.

My 3 kids never had the slightest tendency to think this sort of thing was funny or worthy of teasing. We never made this sort of comment, and just never thought like that. I think kids usually follow the parents' cues.

My DDs best friend is a boy, they are 12 now and still get the comments, always have and I'm presuming as they go in to teen years it will only get worse.

All I could to was tell her to ignore the comments and be friends with who she wishes, They have learnt to brush it off, it's not nice though, it instils in them that they can't just be friends with the opposite sex from a early age, which is ridiculous. My sister had a male best friend from primary, still best friends in their mid 20s.

DD is annoyed by it rather than upset, thankfully. She also asked why they said it about her and male friend but not about her and female friend! (Reasonable question in context as we'd just been reading about different kinds of families and some kids she's quite close to have two mums.)

I know some parents do the "cute" boyfriend/girlfriend thing but it gives me the creeps, to be honest. They're way too young!