Affording a baby?

[KaptenKrusty]

In the middle of buying a house - the mortgage repayments are going to be fairly high (£1300 a month) - this is for a 2 bed house!

Currently we live in a 1 bed rental that is 1450£ a month - so the mortgage will be lower than what we are currently paying! We can afford this at the moment - we have even managed to rent this apartment and save for our deposit at the same time over the last 3 years!

Hope to ttc once we are moved into the new house - I've been doing the sums for how we will manage with me being off work (I only get statutory mat pay) - Husbands salary will be able to pay the mortgage and bills - but there will be very little left to live on after that!

Obviously I plan to save up as much in advance of baby being here to get us through the mat leave - but I feel like even when I go back to work we will still be struggling to get by - my salary will cover childcare and I will have about £200 left over!

So this will likely be a 5 year period that we will be broke for (until the child starts school I guess)! I'm starting get anxiety over it!!

Husband is much more upbeat and relaxed about it - he's doing well at work, he's confident he will be getting a pay rise again soon, gets a decent bonus yearly etc! He just keeps saying it will be fine, we will work it out, we got this, stop worrying so much!!

How do others make it work? do you just get by, make it work somehow? I had always wanted 2 kids - but am thinking now 1 will be hard enough to afford - 2 would push us over the edge!!

I'm desperate to have a baby asap but the stress & uncertainty over money is ruining my excitement!

Anyone any tips / advice to make this work!

Are you aware of the 30 funded hours of childcare from when your DC is 3 years old that you may well be eligible for (check the income threshold)?

Otherwise yes, it’s the childcare costs that are the major financial drain. Preparations for baby and then maternity leave can be done comparatively cheaply. It’s the cost of you returning to work that’s the big one.

@INeedNewShoes I actually work in Childcare myself so am very much up to speed on the funded hours - We would be entitled to that so will be some help! also we are going to set up & save in a tax free childcare account!

We are looking at options such as husband doing a 4 day week and myself doing a 30 hour week over 3 days as an option! might be better off financially as we would only need 2day's of childcare in that instance!!

I just don't know how others do it tbh !!

I guess we will just have to really budget / plan as much as possible !!

I've been floating the idea of getting a lodger into the spare room for a few months to get a bit of cash in too pre kids!

Can you move to a cheaper area or save for more of a deposit before you buy? Or get a mortgage with a longer term?

You say you work in childcare. What about setting up as a registered childminder? Then you can have your own kids with you and I'm sure you would make more than £200 a month with the extra kids.

Any grandparents around that might be delighted to take on a day or 2 of child minding a week?

How old are you? Can you have 1 child then wait for the 30 hours of funded childcare til you have another?!

Don't think about it in terms of "your" salary being taken up by childcare even if it's equivalent to it. It's an expense for both of you and going back to work maintains your income for the future when free hours/school kicks in. If you're budgeting for this separately, your number 1 step is to ensure you're sharing the cost.

Having to budget and plan carefully is 100% normal for a family with kids though. Some families do what you suggest, having one or both parents working a flexible pattern to reduce childcare costs. Others can make it work but need to cut out luxuries.

Reducing your child care bill by working around each other would be a massive help. What would the £200 need to cover op?

In my honest opinion, only 90% of us can actually afford kids but if you really cut back on any luxuries etc then anyone can make it work as long as theres enough to keep a roof over their heads (which you do for yourself anyway), food in their tummys (your doing that anyway so just give them yours if needs be) and all the love you have...we can all 'afford' kids

We moved to a cheaper area and had a sahp, rather than have to factor in childcare.
Affording 3 kids was pretty easy then.

You'll be surprised by how you'll make it work. Pre kids you can easily spend your salary month to month. After you don't go out as much, don't get as much pleasure from clothes unless for baby etc, you learn to colour your own hair (if applicable) cos sitting in hairdresser with a baby/ toddler isn't fun... It's not easy and you will need to tighten your belts but it is possible

@Redviola we are admittedly in an expensive part of the Country - London zone 3! But we have looked at moving to a cheaper area - but the commuting costs cancel out any savings (we both currently cycle to work - so commute costs are zero or £1.50 by bus when we can't cycle in!

My parents are back in Ireland (where we are both from) they would be very helpful if they were here!!

I'm 30 so we would probably wait until first child is going to school to try for number 2 perhaps - the plan is to move back to Ireland by the time baby is off to school in about 5 years if we can make it work! - we would have some help then with number 2 if we did have a second I suppose!

I work in the childcare industry but not directly with the children - I am for a Nursery chain in the HR department so being a childminder would be a very different career move for me.

Move to Ireland then you can both work and have support with childcare.

@Drabarni believe me i've floated this as an option so many times and we've really considered it - but DH is climbing up the chain at work and doing so well and it just wouldn't make sense right now - he has real potential there !! The industry he is in has much better prospects over here - not a lot of opportunities at home (which is why we came over here in the first place)

Ah, sounds like you are actually in a decent position then. Don't worry about having number 2 until the time comes. By then you may have had promotions, house moves etc.

Why only statutory maternity pay? Could you look for a new job where the maternity benefits are better? I work at a university and got full pay for 6 months, then 3 months at a reduced rate (still above statutory).

@Redviola yeah i know the stat pay is not amazing - I am on the look out for something new - but am finally very happy at work for the first time in years and there is a lot of good opportunity where I am / doing a lot of courses and progressing up the ladder a bit here too and they are super family friendly in terms of flexibility on return to work!

So I am a bit torn on whether to leave or not!!

It's a few tight years but it'll be fine. Especially as you seem like the planning type! What we do if it helps, dh works full time, I work 3 days a week. We have 2 dc, Dd has started school this year so does breakfast and after school clubs those 3 days so I can do longer days at work. Ds is 2.5 so no free childcare hrs until next Sept. This is our worst year for money. Nursery plus school clubs are £600 a month. Our mortgage is £600. We've got debts to pay from work to our house. We are sort of in lock down for this year. Then next year we get free hours. Then the year after when they're both at school, I will up my hours and spread them across the week so that I can do school pick ups, we won't have to pay any childcare, we'll clear our debt quickly and save more. And get our lives back a bit.

@Dudewheresmyvan yep exactly i have a fear of things going wrong (boiler, some kind of leak etc) and having to come up with money out of nowhere!!

I'm working heaps of overtime at the moment and will continue - i've even started babysitting again a lot of weekends lolz !

Husband has a little weekend side project that he makes some cash from on weekends as well so we will do as much as poss!

Am thinking about our lifestyle now - and our holidays will be cut back drastically of course which will save money - we'll cut back on the eating out/nights out - we prob spend more on this than we realise!

Gonna start practising living off his salary next month and put mine into savings to see how we go!!

I'm sure you would have already asked, but would your employer give you a reduced cost space for your child?

Whilst very sensible to try and plan unfortunately life gets in the way! You could fall pregnant immediately, you could need £20k of IVF - who knows?! Unfortunately things aren't always straight forward. Live your life and it will work itself out.

@KaptenKrusty move home!! You’ll have help with childcare!! Double the child benefits! No council tax and no water bill. Food is much of a muchness between here and the U.K.
main differences are car costs and health insurance is needed.

@Countrylifeornot good spot - yes I've enquired about this with other staff members and they will offer some sort of discount which will be helpful - usually looks like they offer one day free if I pay full for 2 other days..

So that will of course be very helpful & another reason why i am reluctant to leave!

@JasBBGG yep this is also very true!

Get yourself in as good a financial position as possible so save, pay off debt and don't take on any more. What term is the mortgage over? Can you extend term and change it back when the free hours kick in? Most people manage because they have to. I have to say we moved out of London when we had children but my husband had a job transfer and I got a job anywhere. It is difficult not just because of high housing costs but childcare seems more expensive there too. You just have to cut back as much as possible and resign yourself to living frugally for a few years.

I don't understand. Your rent is £150 a month more than your mortgage but you have managed to save for a deposit. And you will only have one child in childcare. So surely you will have enough.
I had 3 in 4 years, and went back to work in between each. I used childcare vouchers and got the 30 hours and it was really manageable.
We also managed to sell our house and bought a much bigger one. Buying and selling can sometimes make you some money.

@Poetryinaction lol - you sound like my husband - this is reassuring!

I guess I am just a natural worrier (have had bouts of anxiety and therefore really like to plan & be organised!)

I've actually totally forgotten that we are managing to save £1k a month as the minute towards the house deposit - I guess because it's out of sight and I can't access it easily it's like it doesn't exist!

I guess if we just keep saving until this current non existent baby (hopefully) arrives we would manage to have quite a bit there to get us through my mat leave at least!