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School photos as Christmas Presents?

17 replies

nedtherobbot · 11/11/2019 17:44

Deadline for ordering school photographs is tomorrow. The photographer they use is fantastic somehow his managed to get a lovely picture of ds and one of dd and ds together, which I wasn't expecting as he usually won't cooperate with anyone new at all. Really pleased with all three proofs, will be buying copies in some form of each of them, I want one of them each. This is the first year ds has been in nursery, so usually just have dd's to buy. I normally get the CD and print photos for everyone and put them in frames dd decorates. This year with 3 to buy the price to do this has trebled.

Dh's manager has just messed up at work for the second time with submitting sickness forms to pay role on time. So Dh has been paid ssp when he shouldn't have been. He still hasn't submitted the correct form so payrole can rectify the mistake, so it will likely be rectified in his next pay packet at the end of the week. I've just sorted out our finances from the first time he did this at the start of last month, as the rectified pay the following fortnite mucks up our housing benefit claim. We're very lucky to have enough of a buffer to cover ourselves with careful budgeting until everything has tun through the system and been resolved, likely the end of December start of January judging by our last experience. So money is going to be tight until then, bills will be paid and I've already got the children's Christmas presents. But I'm not going to be able to buy adult Christmas presents to the usual standards and pay for everyone to have each of the photos.

Dm always buys her own school photos, she remembers how expensive they can be, and has already given me the money for the prints she wants. Mil on the hand has form for being an entitled CF, most of the ils do, and if asked if she wants to buy some would happily ask me to order them for her then never contribute towards them. We had this with dd's first school photos, mil asked us to order the sizes she wanted, the larger more expensive opptions for her and gmil but despite reminders the money never got to us, was happy to suck it up and not offer again, but couldn't afford to right now if we asked what she wanted.

So I have the option of doing normal Christmas presents and giving ils a copy of the joint school photo. Or giving all 3 framed by dd and a smaller presents; box or gmil's favorite chocolates, mil's favourite diseny princess socks, fil coin collecting pouches, Aunty and family a big tin of chocolates. Dh is being very unhelpful on what to do. He has a strained relationship with his mum at best. He doesn't really understand how tight the budget is as we don't need him to cancel his already paid for weekend away with his brother for their mutual hobby (a cue sport). I think either way I'll end up making the wrong decision.

So would would other mumsnetters do? All the photos as presents with a token gift or normal gift and just the one photo?

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Widowodiw · 11/11/2019 17:50

Well, if I didn’t have enough money tbh I wouldn’t do either. Your all adults you don’t need presents. As for the photos we aren’t really bothered by school photos like our parents were. I think this is because we take some many photos nowadays don’t we? I also think these school photographers take the piss with the cost of the packs that they put together. I don’t want 10 versions of each photo. I just want 1x Ds, 1xds and 1x both together. No pack offers that.

nedtherobbot · 11/11/2019 18:04

We do take so many photos now. We're lucky the photographer that the school uses doesn't have riged packs like some. You choose the size and numbers of prints you want to order and there's a discount for going over a certain number. I can just order one of each image in 6 x 4 without ending up with loads of extras or buy a CD with the licence if it's cheeper or a canvas for a crazy price. But my mum and mil and gmil are very bothered about them. Despite the number of photos we take it's rare to get such a good one of ds too.

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ShirleyPhallus · 11/11/2019 18:06

I have nothing helpful to add but just wanted to touch on this:

Or giving all 3 framed by dd and a smaller presents; box or gmil's favorite chocolates, mil's favourite diseny princess socks

Can we hear more about your MIL wanting socks with her favourite Disney princess on them.....?!

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nedtherobbot · 11/11/2019 18:08

It won't leave us without money, but I don't have enough to do both. I've budgeted for all our bills to be paid until the end of December and for a bit more than our usual food budget to be put aside. Plus most of Christmas Dinner is already in the freezer and I have fairly good size box of Christmas food stashed. I just need to use some of our Christmas savings to do photos if buying for everyone.

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nedtherobbot · 11/11/2019 18:11

Mil loves snow white. Gifts are usually something along this theam and I've managed to locate a pack of adult snow white socks that were going to be part of her present. She always wants dd's princess socks so they will be abel to match!

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Frith2013 · 11/11/2019 18:12

What a boring Christmas present to receive!

BackforGood · 11/11/2019 18:14

I used to put any school photos of the dc in the general parcel of Christmas presents to Aunties / Uncles / Grandparents. I couldn't bring myself to count it as a present. I mean - it's a photo.

But I refuse to pay the ridiculous prices school photographers charge on a regular basis.
I got my dcs' photos in Reception and I got one the one year all 3 of them were on a joint photo and not a lot of other ones.

I'm also a big fan of not getting presents for adults at Christmas, so would suggest that if money is tight.

However, if everyone is exchanging presents you can't count a photo of your dc as a present, no. Definitely only buy the joint one, not individual ones.

nedtherobbot · 11/11/2019 18:23

Frith, it's one of the few things I'm sure she'll be thrilled with. She went to diseny this year and didn't buy them for herself and has talked about how sad she is on missing out on them but won't order them online due to postage cost. My friend from the USA has picked up the pair she wanted, the same that she brought back for dd, and is bring them when she visits in a couple of weeks.

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FavouriteSoul · 11/11/2019 19:12

If MIL likes Disney princess socks, buy her a pair (but not official merchandise, from Poundland). And gift them all the photos in hand made frames BUT only if you can afford it.

BlueLadybird · 11/11/2019 19:44

I’d text/call MIL and say ‘Hi MIL, School photos are out and it’s a great one of DS. No obligation for you to get any but we’re pretty strapped for cash right now so if you want any we’ll need the cash up front.’

Then buy her the socks, chocolates, nothing, or whatever you like.

Cookit · 11/11/2019 19:51

Just get them all one photo - the photo of the two together. You don’t have to make a big deal about this. Finances are tight so they can all have one lovely photo and a tiny present and that should be fine. You’re talking about adults here.

Also your MIL loves Snow White - is this not incredibly weird??

Idratherplayherewithallthemadn · 11/11/2019 19:52

Omg op we've given photos or calenders for years.

Don't worry about it! Lovely gift.
People take gc for granted, some people will never have dc, and some will never have gc but desperately want some.

Pictures of said gc are precious.. Money is tight its best value gift you can give

TroysMammy · 11/11/2019 19:55

Except for the first school photo all the other ones of my niece are hideous and I've never put them up. I did say to my DSis when she mentioned school photos the other day that I have plenty of lovely photos of my niece not in her school uniform. I hope my DSis took the hint.

GloGirl · 11/11/2019 20:00

I always give a photo of some sort to the grandparents at Christmas! If they dont find my children adorable and charming who will? Grin

EdWinchester · 11/11/2019 20:04

I am not a fan of school photos, so that would be an awful present to me.

Much nicer to print a great photo taken on the beach or something imo.

And wtf with the mil that loves Snow White!

BoomyBooms · 11/11/2019 20:56

My DB & SIL gifted us a beautiful framed school photo for Xmas one year, we love it! It's lovely sentimental gift, more meaningful than tonnes of random crap at Xmas.

nedtherobbot · 11/11/2019 21:14

I'm certainly over thinking this. I know photos will be well received and that the budget accomidates buying them without trouble. There would be more dissapointment if they didn't get them then saw them hung up at ours when I couldn't get anymore. They are good photos certainly better than we ever manage to capture of the little whirl wind.

Not sure what to say about the snow white thing. It makes her easy to buy for. I have one of those strange princess dress lap blankets in progress for her birthday... Not my thing but she's asked for one since I crochet. I do find all the China figures creepy, but find most figures creepy. It's always easy to buy for her.

I have better things to worry about, but can't do anything about them, just wait. So nervous energy must be focusing else where.

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