What is 'too young'?

[username89097]

Is there a 'too young' to have kids?
And is there a 'too young' to settle in a relationship/get married?

I'd say it is more about 'stage of relationship' than 'age of mother'.

Married at 23 and buying our own home
Had children at 25, 27 and 29
Just right

Having had babies at ages 23, 28 and 36 my pregnancy at 36 was definitely harder than my previous ones in my 20’s recovery from the birth was longer too.

Looking back in terms of age I didn’t appreciate quiet how young I was at 23 . If I was going to pick a time to start having done it all now I would have started at around 26/27 and had my second at 30 and last at 34, but that obviously all my ideals and we all know life doesn’t really work like that.

@Lillygolightly
I had babies similarly at 24, 28 and 36.

The baby bit has been just as brutal as the others.
But physically after the birth I felt like I'd been hit by a bus for weeks after. Every bone and muscle hurt, I actually had a blood tests to establish if I was lacking in anything.

Nope, I'm just old. 😁

What SweetPetrichor said with bells on.

"I don't think there's an 'age' as such imo, but I'd say it was when you're financially stable, in a stable relationship, and with as much certainty as is ever possible that your future is fit for supporting a child."

Under 18 is always too young. No exceptions. Although there's always the one person who has triplets aged 14 then goes on to get three Oxbridge degrees and a career in investment banking.

18 - 23ish - depends on the individual. Some 21 year olds are very switched on, financially stable and in a great relationship. Most aren't.

25+ appears to be the best time for most people.

I don't think there is a "too young" but having got married myself at 21 I can say that I am a much different person now than I was at that age and I think you do grow and change a lot throughout your 20s. In hindsight I shouldn't have married at that age and no the marriage did not last.

I had DS at 22 and I wasn't financially secure. I wouldn't change it now but again it probably wasn't the best idea.

@KindergartenKop it’s normal in my culture to have children while studying so they don’t screw up your career. I did it myself. Obviously I didn’t do as well as I would have without them but not by much and I still managed to line up a great corporate job before finishing my degree. I had minimal help and it really wasn’t that bad. I definitely think university is the best time to do it (unless you are studying something like medicine).