*Lighthearted* What has DH done to piss you off today?

[Monkerina]

Reasonably lighthearted at least, please, I need to feel less pissed off!

Today DH unknowingly stepped on a nugget of cat shit and walked it all the way through the house to 3yo DS1's room. Once the poo culprit was identified, it was suddenly time for work and he swanned off cheerily, leaving me with shitty carpets to clean and 3.5yo and 7mo DS to entertain at the same time.

He also put his breakfast bowl and spoon in the clean dishwasher, somehow managing to sully every single clean item with weetabixy milk drops.

He's surely only fit for patio treatment, amirite? Anyone else joining him?

No court in the land would convict you.

I woke up with my husbands elbow firmly pressed into my face. Twat 😂

Mine has this habit of moving my pillows around when I get up with the baby so be basically cuddles them.

It was fine today because she slept all the way through so I didn't settle her then get back into bed, but he left the pillows in the 'cuddle' position rather than making the bed and it gives me the rage

I got up before my DP (as usual - he doesn’t start work till 11 at the moment ). When I went in to kiss him goodbye, he rolled over in his sleep and elbowed my head!

Honestly what are they all thinking!

Following carpetpoogate mine has just texted asking for permission to go to a pub quiz 🤔 guess I'm his mum now. And 3.5yo DS has taken agin Eamonn Holmes and is screeching and refusing to watch CBeebies whilst I try to put his early-rising, teething baby brother down for a nap. Today's got to get better at some point right?!

Technically nothing. But I had a dream that he helpfully arranged for the carpet fitters to come while I was at work, then I got home and he'd had the whole house done in the wrong carpet. Not even a "slightly wrong" carpet, but a brightly coloured, patchwork effect that I'd picked out for a small rug.

I woke up furious with him, because it's exactly the sort of thing he would do. Try to be helpful and get it sensationally wrong.

Sat on the bed to put his socks on - while I was making it. Why. What did he think I was doing? I always leave it when we get up to air it, the make it after breakfast. Same routine, every day. Why did he decide to sit on it today and stop me?

Mine leaves socks everywhere. And I mean EVERYWHERE! On the worktops in the kitchen, shoved down the back of the sofa, on the stairs EVERYHERE

Insisted I went to bed early as I was nodding on the sofa. I said 'I'll just finish the kitchen.' He said not to worry, he would do that.
When I got up this morning, guess what? He hadn't. Not that I was surprised.
Actually, though I moan now, he's really upped his game over the last 6 months. He's annoying me much less than he used to!

And, he's got a new job.

It's a good promotion and it's hard work. I am very proud of him and impressed but he started this week and makes it sound like he's President of the United Nations or something.

Nothing yet. But I'm just about to start work (we both wfh) and he will noisily interrupt me every time he wants attention, and wee with the door open, and get on noisy gym equipment at lunchtime. Wfh is seriously over rated!!

Nothing yet . Sure he will think of something though.
Don't have a patio but I do have a large shovel if it's any use to you 💐

Coughed and coughed and coughed and coughed and coughed and coughed and coughed. I know he can't help it. He has the most miserable cold. But he came in at gone midnight last night after a meal out with colleagues and clattered round the kitchen coughing for about an hour, thoroughly waking me up.

Tbh it's just the standing there. In front of drawers, the sink, the bin, the telly and the washing machine.

Breathed 😉

He has a cold and last night slept flat on his back right in the middle of the bed, snoring away, blissfully wrapped in the duvet while I fumed and shivered on the edge of the bed until I got fed up and went to sleep in DD's room. He had the nerve to ring me from work and tell me that he feels great because he's had "an amazing nights sleep". Fucker.

He also grounded DS last night for giving him attitude - no console, no going out, no TV, and no iPad. Basically giving me a stroppy, bored child to deal with later when he knows I've got a joiner coming out to hang the new doors in the front room and I need the DC entertained/out of the way. Fucker.

I texted him to say I'm making fajitas for dinner, would he like chicken or beef? He replied "I don't fancy fajitas" so I asked what he would like for dinner in that case as I'm fed up of deciding what to make only to have people say they don't want that. "I don't know, whatever you decide to make instead is fine". Fuuuuuuuucker.

Basically he's irking me today. I'm irked. He is irksome.

He's working away from home this week and rang me at 9.30 to say good morning. I was having a lovely lie in. Git.

I asked mine to boil potatoes for his shepherds pie ( I am veggie) and then take out 3 lumps so I can make a Spanish omelette tonight.

He took out the 3 lumps pre- cooking!
And then made his shepherds pie.

Looks like I'll be cooking my own potatoes.

He got out of bed second and didn't bother to make the whole bed, just his side.

He also rinsed his smoothie glass out into the sink but didn't rinse the sink so bit of smoothie were everywhere.

Mine has night terrors and kneed me in the back twice while gibbering nonsense sounds. This was at 3am and he slept through the whole thing. I have been away for a few weeks and am jet lagged so couldn’t get back to sleep so ended up in a 24 hour supermarket at 5.45am to buy essentials. Those ‘essentials’ included 3 doughnuts, one for each of the kids. I’d finished them before anyone woke up.

Lighthearted would not be a good I'd have used about poo left on the carpet !

Mine refused to suck a strepsil last night until I threatened to stick one up each nostril. His annoying tickly cough went from every 30 seconds to every hour.

Scrunched his wet towel up on top of the dry clean towels. He does it every morning. Leaves dirty socks in the living room every single night. Soaks every inch of the bathroom when he has a shower. Eats like an absolute pig.
I love these threads

Absolutely refusing to buy the car I want despite the fact that he will not drive it and I’m the one that does the school runs and all the running around. It makes not one jot of difference to him what I drive but because he doesn’t like it, and he’s paying, I don’t get a say. He thinks I should have a people carrier. Over my fucking dead body will I be driving a people carrier.

Same as every morning! Makes breakfast (pours cereal in bowls, adds milk) then thinks that all the morning stuff is done. Never mind the 3 DC that need to brush teeth, get dressed, have packed lunches, water bottles, snacks, coats, shoes, plus any forms/swimming kit/anything else Also puts shoes on as soon as he's dressed, thus tramping dirt through the house.

Then spent half an hour detailing how 11.5 hours of Saturday plus 3 hours of Sunday he (with the only car) will not be home with me & 3 younger DC as he'll be off at football with DS1 & expecting me to be fine with it. I'm not.

I too am irked. DP was away for a couple of days and I had DC on my own, and while that was hard work, it was SO much easier to keep everything tidy and I didn’t just WALK AWAY FROM A MESSY KITCHEN ONCE I’D FINISHED MAKING BREAKFAST.

Very thoughtfully washes up after he eats his dinner (later than the rest of us) but leaves the washing up sponge floating around a cold, grey sink full of water for me to deal with in the morning.
Oh, thanks love, I look forward to plunging my hands into a vile soup when I get the kids' breakfast.