If you’ve been signed off with anxiety..

[Godivehadenoughalready]

Can I ask what you said to your line manager and/or HR?

I think I need to take some time off but I am very nervous about what to say, and how it will be received. I also really don’t want a lot of questions as I’m a pretty private person at work and am dreading the intrusion, people knowing I’m struggling.

I just don’t know how to explain it or say that I might be off for 2 weeks.

I've not been in your situation, but I have been in your manager's situation.

If I was your manager and you told me 'I've been signed off with anxiety, it's difficult for me to talk about so I'd appreciate it if you didn't ask too many questions" I'd absolutely respect that.

If you gave me a a vague reason I'd try my best to help, which might accidentally involve asking difficult things.

I would also help you to keep it private from the rest of the team if that's what you wanted. Or in my managee's case they asked me to briefly tell the team, with no details, to prevent inaccurate gossip. Either way, I'd be led by you.

Good luck

When it was me I told my direct boss that I had been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and that I was about to start taking some medication and wanted a couple of days to let them start working as I'd been advised there may be some nasty side effects. No one else was informed of the reason for my absence as should be the case for you.

If you have a sick note you can just hand that in. It should give the reason for your absence if you're worried about having to chat to it to anyone.

Take the time you need op, anxiety is a horrible thing.

Thanks for your replies.

I’m worried it’s going to be seen very negatively but feel I’ve got little choice. It’s really hard 😥

I’ve been off a couple of times with anxiety/depression. Both times my employer was fairly good. Once a Dr has signed you off, that’s all there is to it really. It’s not something you have to justify. They should keep it private obviously. At the end of the day, we are all a combination of our mental and physical selves, and one in four of us will have mental health problem at some point in time. It is better for your company in the long run for you to be off, get better and come back well.

Can anyone help me understand how you feel with anxiety please.

What do you get anxiety about? One thing or everything?

My friend is signed off and I want to understand more to be more supportive. I never k ow e right things to say.

What can I do to help her?

I worry about things, stupid things but then I just push them to the back of my mind or take steps to sort the problem out. Is anxiety not being able to focus to do that?

Hope your feeling ok op.

Is anxiety the same as depression?

Anxiety is not the same as depression

Anxiety is not as easy to deal with as it sounds, anxious
It can range differently person to person, some mild and able to get on with going to work etc.
Chronic anxiety can floor you, with me I literally can’t stomach food, diarrhoea , dry heaving bad headaches, waking in2/3 times night that’s if I can manage to get off to sleep, just having to go to gp shopping or seeing someone I know makes it worse. I just want to stay in the house where I can be myself and not try to act I’m ok when I feel terrible with the symptoms
That’s with medication sometimes

No but the two are often linked or suffered Concurrently.
My anxiety when it flares up manifests itself in racing heart, feeling physically jumpy and sick. When it's really bad-panic attack stage I physically shake, have chest pains and can't breathe and I have had sort of tunnel vision before.
Depression to me just feels like everything is pointless and more effort than I am able to give. Its being really annoyed by the pile of washing on the chair but not having the energy to do anything about it and struggling to get out of bed. It's just feeling that everything is blackly hopeless, I am useless and I'll never feel any different.
I'm feeling very anxious at the moment-in fact I've just had to start taking Meds again. But I'm not depressed this time around which is a mercy.

I would suggest you see your GP and either get signed off or get a diagnosis

Otherwise your manager is in a difficult position. Likely wants to give you time off but needs something from a medical professional to confirm that you have received a diagnosis

beckyvardy

It's different for everyone. For me, when it's bad I sometimes get intrusive thoughts of terrible things happening (the nature of anxiety means that the intrusive thoughts are the things you dread most). My intrusive thoughts are (currently) very vivid imaginings of awful things happening during labour/birth/awful things happening to my baby/DH. When I can't shake the thoughts I end up crying, usually. I'm lucky in that I have only very rarely in my life experienced panic attacks.

When I'm well I can quite easily identify that kind of thought as unlikely/unhelpful and distract myself or focus on more positive/realistic things. When I'm not well I can't, though. It really is like being stuck in a nightmare and unable to wake up.

It's not the same as depression but quite often people have both. If you have problems with anxiety then doing basic day-to-day things (e.g. going to the supermarket) can be very hard, so you end up doing less and less. After a while, your mood can start to dip. Often people who are struggling with anxiety blame themselves and tell themselves they are silly/stupid/useless etc and that feeds into depression too.
On the flip side, people who have depression tend to have very negative views of themselves, the world in general, and what the future holds*. If you believe that you are stupid and useless and the world is dangerous and everything is going to go wrong, you often end up worrying.

Best thing for your friend is to ask her what is going on, how she's feeling, what it's like. She might not want to talk about it, of course. If she does, just listen to her. Maybe empathise a bit "that sounds really tough" etc. Try to resist the urge to "fix" it for her or to try to reassure her out of the anxiety "But you're brilliant at your job! Of course they're not trying to get rid of you!" might be a completely natural thing to want to say, but that kind of thought needs to come from within her for her to believe it.

*There's a lot more to depression than this, but it's a common thread.

OP, see your GP.

Ime GPs are usually pretty understanding and they've always asked me what I want written on the sick note.

You might want to discuss medication while you're there. There's a few different options for anxiety meds - beta blockers, low-dose anti depressants, or propranolol (a med you take just as and when the anxiety is bad, not necessarily every day).
They might also suggest you investigate talking therapies, which can be really helpful (especially if you click with the therapist. Don't be scared to request a different therapist if you want one).

Becky have you ever had a near miss when driving? You know that second where you hold your breath, your heart stutters and you get a rush of adrenaline? Imagine having that feeling all the time.

Thank you for the explanations. I really appreciate that.

I can be a bit more helpful to her now.

Can I ask one more question though please?

So it's not one specific Thing it's just in general?

For most work places you need a note from your GP to be off as sick for any real length of time. You need to check your work's policy to know how long you can be off without one.

However, it is definitely worth seeing your GP as you can start medication and be referred for other therapies. Medication can take some time to work, or some time to find the right drug for you.

So it's not one specific Thing it's just in general?

Depends on the person. If it's one specific thing, eg spiders, or social situations, we usually call that a phobia. If it's about absolutely anything and everything, it's Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD). There are many other forms available too.

Even if two people both have, say, GAD, they will experience it differently. Upbringing, culture, age, religion, job, family situation etc etc etc all feed in to a person's experience. Mental health problems really are different for everyone.

Thank you 🙏

Thanks everyone. Tableclothing and historysock describe things well.

I am seeing the GP tomorrow and will ask for a sick note but if anyone has ideas on what to say, rather than spelling out anxiety and depression, please advise. Stress is a bit vague, and mental health doesn’t sound right.

Hallo. I’ve posted before on this but I wondered if anyone had advice on how to phrase a sick note if I’m off work with anxiety/depression.

My work is very male oriented and competitive and I know they will be very negative about it. I’m looking for another job but don’t want to be pushed out before I find something. I am basically really struggling and stressed, cannot concentrate and am not sleeping. I just want some space and privacy for 2 weeks to get better mentally.

For what it’s worth, I’ve never had any sickness time off before in four years with my current employer, apart from the odd day here and there.

What can the GP write that won’t give me away or publicise the fact I’m struggling with my mental health? It’s mainly my home life that’s the issue but it’s affecting my confidence at work massively.

I was in this situation earlier this year but it was all due to work stress and my team leader. I just sent in my sick note online to my team leader who forwarded it to HR. I took two weeks off and then gave one weeks notice and left. I started some medication which made the anxiety horribly worse before it got better. Hope you feel better soon.

I didn't really get a choice what the GP wrote on the sick note. I was hoping he would write depression as that was what I felt was the problem. He wrote stress and anxiety.

To try to explain my anxiety - I left this horrible job three months ago but still wake in the night and the first thought in my head is this job and how I felt, my heart is racing and I struggle to go back to sleep. I worry about things that happened years ago and blame myself for things. I have intrusive thoughts, I sometimes can't motivate myself to do things yet some days I am hugely productive if having a good day. Sometimes just making a phone call is hard. It is horrible but I'm glad I am getting help for it after many years of struggling.